books help confidence

27 Books to Improve Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, and Self-Image

From the charismatic doctor to the energetic motivational speaker or the loving and friendly teacher, at each level and each age, people are more driven toward those who come across as self-reliant and confident.

Self-esteem, self-worth, and self-image are all counterparts of the umbrella term ‘self-love.’ They are constructs that denote the way we look at ourselves, perceive ourselves as individual entities, and portray our personalities to the world. Confidence is the key to a fulfilling life, and having high self-esteem is where it all begins.

Self-esteem develops from childhood. The way we interact, observe, and listen to others’ communication patterns can play a significant role in shaping how we see and feel about ourselves.

Building self-esteem and self-reliance is a matter of concern today, and thanks to the recent advancements in science and literature, we now have the right answers to it.

This article lists some of the best books available on self-esteem and related topics. The resources are practical and evidence based, and suggest effective ways we can implement the knowledge in our everyday lives.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will not only help you increase the compassion and kindness you show yourself but will also give you the tools to help your clients, students, or employees show more compassion to themselves.

This Article Contains

The 10 best books on self-esteem for adults, 3 good books that address low self-esteem, 3 self-esteem books for kids (incl. picture books), what books on self-esteem are recommended for teenage girls, 3 books on self-worth, 3 recommendations on self-image, 2 audiobook recommendations, a take-home message, frequently asked questions.

Carmen Jacob, a famous life coach and holistic counselor, presented a list of the best books on self-esteem that shouldn’t be missed. Here are the top 10 from her list.

1. The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field – Nathaniel Branden

The author has creatively presented the benefits of developing self-esteem based on six pillars. The book explains why self-esteem is an essential requirement for a healthy body, mind, and personality, and suggests practical ways for nurturing it.

The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem is a highly recommended book for mental health professionals, teachers, and parents who wish to empower themselves and others with a definite sense of self.

Find the book on Amazon .

2. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are – Brené Brown

The book pleasantly invites readers to know that they are more than what they think themselves to be. The author explains how normal it is to feel unworthy and ‘low’ at times.

Brown offers some meaningful and scientific strategies to accept our inner critic and use it to embrace our ‘imperfect’ life in the best possible way.

Find the book on Amazon  or find more self-acceptance books here .

3. What to Say When You Talk to Your Self – Shad Helmstetter

This accessible self-help guide is filled with cutting-edge information on how to practice positive self-talk . It provides practical tips on how to counter feelings of low self-worth and take charge of your happiness.

The book follows a smooth and straightforward approach and is relatable for readers of all ages.

4. Ten Days to Self-Esteem – David D. Burns

Ten Days to Self-Esteem by David Burns takes readers through a glorious journey of acknowledgment and self-discovery. The book talks about acceptance, compassion, and innovation as vital components to building a secure self-belief system within oneself.

The methods and examples mentioned here are individualized and embrace human fallibility. The book is practical, evidence backed, and effectively applicable in today’s context.

5. What’s Right With Me: Positive Ways to Celebrate Your Strengths, Build Self-Esteem, and Reach Your Potential – Carlene DeRoo and Carolyn DeRoo

The book is inspirational and helps readers cultivate a firm sense of self. It scientifically explains why positive thinking is the starting point to healthy self-esteem and talks about the different small or big lifestyle tweaks that can help us get there.

6. Awaken the Giant Within: How to Take Immediate Control of Your Mental, Emotional, Physical and Financial Destiny! – Tony Robbins

The book follows a step-by-step approach to becoming more self-dependent and in control of ourselves. For those struggling to find meaning in their lives, this book can be an eye-opening guide for increased self-love and acceptance.

7. The New Psycho-Cybernetics – Maxwell Maltz

This book by Dr. Maxwell Maltz is helpful for goal setting and executing vital life plans. He has frequently updated his work to include contemporary aspects of the resources.

As readers say, ‘from weight management to professional success,’ there is no aspect that is left untouched here.

It is a recommended read for professionals in demanding jobs or students who are about to start their work life.

8. The Power of Your Subconscious Mind – Joseph Murphy

This book follows an entirely new approach, blending parts of religion, culture, literature, and science to explain what happiness means and suggest ways to cultivate it within ourselves.

This enlightening book on self-love and self-power is an excellent read for people from all walks of life.

9. Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy – Steven C. Hayes

The process of ACT helps us differentiate between pain and suffering, and the book Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life focuses on this aspect of wellbeing. Author Steven Hayes has brought forth some of the most useful scientific techniques to overpower temporary struggles and look at the bigger picture.

This book is a revolutionary approach to dealing with depression, anxiety, and stress disorders. It helps readers learn how we can positively address our pains and discover our strengths within the suffering to enjoy a fulfilling life.

10. Healing Your Emotional Self: A Powerful Program to Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem, Quiet Your Inner Critic, and Overcome Your Shame – Beverly Engel

Healing Your Emotional Self addresses a wide range of early life experiences that profoundly affect a child’s self-esteem and suggests successful ways of dealing with them.

The book is insightful for parents, teachers, counselors, and anyone who deals with childhood and adolescent issues and wants to delve deep into the underlying causes of low self-esteem.

Dr. Berni Sewell, an experienced health scientist, energy healer, and established author, mentioned the following books in her articles on self-love and self-power. These books, as she suggests, are great reads for anyone who wishes to explore their true potential and make the most of their lives.

1. You Can Heal Your Life – Louise Hay

Author Louise Hay has shared some significant first-hand experiences, including her life situations, about how people can turn things to their favor by merely thinking and feeling positive about themselves.

2. The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living – Dalai Lama

The Art of Happiness is a collection of the Dalai Lama’s stories, meditations, and messages on the ways we can invite happiness back into our lives.

The book presents a series of one-on-one conversations the author had with different people at different points in life. It is a cornerstone book for endless inspiration, self-love, and meaningful existence – a must-read for all.

3. Matrix Energetics: The Science and Art of Transformation – Richard Bartlett

After experiencing a life-changing event, the author discovered the science of energy transformation, which, according to him, could be a quick and permanent heal for people struggling with self-esteem issues.

The book talks about his research and how readers can apply his rules to get rid of their insecurities and thrive. A different yet exciting approach to building self-esteem, you can find this book on Amazon .

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Recommended by The New York Times and other prestigious magazines and newspapers, here are some self-help books that aim to help parents and professionals raise confident and self-reliant kids.

1. It’s Okay to Be Different – Todd Parr

His book, It’s Okay To Be Different , is an easy-to-read, accessible, pictorially represented manual with stories and illustrations on how children can love and trust themselves.

The book encourages kids to build character strength, embrace diversity, and learn to accept their minds and bodies.

2. The Lion Inside – Rachel Bright

The primary aim of author Rachel Bright is to cultivate the habit of talking about what a child feels and what drives their actions or reactions.

With inspiring texts that promote self-esteem and confidence, The Lion Inside is a recommended read for kids aged 5–12 years.

3. I Am Enough – Grace Byers

Keeping humanity above everything, author and activist Grace Byers has brought us the most essential tips on how children can learn their purpose of living and use rational thinking to perceive life events.

Teenagers are often victims of low self-esteem. From having an attractive body to having an ideal relationship, adolescents carry a considerable burden of being ‘perfect.’

Thankfully, we have an affluence of books and resources that address low adolescent self-esteem and suggest scientific ways to overrule them.

The following list of books was advocated by Denise Witmer, a famous parenting coach and author, as some good reads for uplifting self-esteem in teenage girls.

1. Chocolate for a Teen’s Soul: Life-Changing Stories for Young Women About Growing Wise and Growing Strong – Kay Allenbaugh

From first love to first jobs and first heartbreak, Chocolate for a Teen’s Soul offers an energetic approach to looking at teenage troubles and preventing them from taking a toll on self-confidence .

2. The Real Rules for Girls – Mindy Morgenstern

The book addresses issues like parental discord, love life problems, menstrual and hormonal ups and downs, and emotion management.

3. Get Over It! How to Survive Break-ups, Back-Stabbing Friends, and Bad Haircuts –  Beth Mayall

From coping with stress to dealing with academic under-achievements and familial expectations, this book offers straightforward and practical steps that girls can follow to feel better about themselves.

Matt Valentine, a self-published and renowned self-help author, mentioned the following books as some of the best resources for enhancing a sense of self-worth .

1. The Magic of Thinking Big – David J. Schwartz

Author David J. Schwartz believes that unless we are ready to acknowledge our strengths and weaknesses, we can never break loose from the trap of under-confidence.

Written in accessible English and a conversational tone, this book is excellent for self-empowerment at the very core.

2. Think and Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill

Author Napoleon Hill has talked about building confidence and generating happiness in life by enhancing mental faculties. The book is all about developing a strong self-system that won’t be easy to break.

An insightful and motivating resource for all ages, this book is available in paperback and digital forms.

Find this book on Amazon .

3. The Power of Positive Thinking – Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

The Power of Positive Thinking has a modern approach and follows a personal tone. The author has beautifully explained the value of having our own space and how we can use it for the betterment of ourselves.

From goal setting to executing life plans, this book has everything you need to stand up on your feet again.

Find the book on Amazon or find more goal-setting books .

Self-image , or the way we perceive ourselves, is a significant component of our identity. The following books have been suggested as useful resources on improving self-image by eminent authors and researchers like Jon Kabat-Zinn, Jessica Smith, and Diane Ackerman.

1. Who Moved My Cheese? – Spencer Johnson

The book has components of realism, spirituality, positive interventions, and lifestyle modification tips, all of which aim to show readers how they can adapt to life more efficaciously.

With the quirky metaphor of cheese, the author has taken a deep dig into successfully driving ourselves to a happier life. A highly recommended read and a personal favorite self-help book, this can truly get the ball of self-motivation rolling.

2. Mindsight: Change Your Brain and Your Life – Daniel J. Siegel

He introduced the term ‘mindsight’ to refer to the integration of brain science and psychotherapeutic techniques. Through his writing, Siegel has conveyed how we can use inclusive approaches to address real-life problems and successfully come out of them.

The book comes with a selection of case studies from the author’s practice, and each example is followed by practical measures on how readers can implement the steps in their lives.

Siegel has taken into consideration the problems that come with a poor self-image, including social phobia and relationship distress, and has offered reliable ways to deal with them through mindsight.

3. Body Confidence: The Scientific Approach on How to Shine From Within – Dr. Katherine E. Iscoe

Dr. Katherine Iscoe’s book sheds light on cultivating positive body image and celebrates radical self-acceptance . The book is divided into three segments, each addressing a crucial aspect of the self-system.

The author has scooped out vital points on the emotional impacts of criticisms and bullying, and has offered state-of-the-art measures to minimize the harm. It is recommended for adolescents, women, and anyone who wishes to identify their strengths and look beyond short-term failures.

Recommended as top self-help audiobooks by The New York Times and the BABCP Magazine, here are some all-time favorite resources for bringing out the best in yourself.

1. Overcoming Low Self-Esteem –  Melanie Fennell

The book emphasizes the importance of self-care and self-recognition.

It runs through the different aspects of high self-esteem and guides listeners to learn and administer the rules on themselves.

2. Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone – Brené Brown

The author strongly points at the fact that if we are happy with ourselves and do not wait for others to approve or disapprove of our actions, we can call on our high self-esteem and courage.

The book navigates through all the mundane problems that can damage the self-system, including money, obesity, relationship abuse, and bullying. It has provided a clear roadmap to dealing with each of them for a better self-understanding. With a personal touch and a storytelling tone, this book can be the silver lining to anyone struggling to thrive.

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Self-esteem and confidence hold in all aspects of our lives. From academic achievements to social bonds, with the right self-system, we can flourish and seek happiness from within. As the saying goes, “ To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness .”

Knowing about self-reliance and self-esteem can prepare us for the journey and accelerate our success. The books and resources in this article can mark the beginning of building our inner potential and giving ourselves a realistic view of the true meaning of self-contentment.

Whether it’s related to goal setting or self-acknowledgment, the real power lies within us, and this is what most authors and researchers have tried to express in their works. To learn from our mistakes, utilize the learning for future actions, and respect ourselves before we expect others to respect us: that is the real power of self-esteem.

For more practical applications to improve your self-esteem , read our article detailing self-esteem worksheets and activities.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

The five areas of self-esteem, according to Nathaniel Branden’s theory, are (Moss & Maki, 1998);

• self-awareness,
• self-acceptance,
• self-responsibility,
• self-assertiveness, and
• self-transcendence.

These areas reflect different aspects of self-esteem and can be cultivated through various means, including self-reflection and personal growth activities.

Yes, self-esteem is related to self-image from a scientific perspective. Self-image refers to a person’s perception of themselves, while self-esteem refers to their overall evaluation of their worth or value as a person, and research has found that there is a strong correlation between the two constructs (Matsuba et al., 2012).

The four types of self-esteem are (Bosson et al., 2000);

• high explicit and high implicit self-esteem,
• high explicit and low implicit self-esteem,
• low explicit and high implicit self-esteem, and
• low explicit and low implicit self-esteem.
• Allenbaugh, K. (2000). Chocolate for a teen’s soul: Life-changing stories for young women about growing wise and growing strong. Fireside.
• Bartlett, R. (2009).  Matrix energetics: The science and art of transformation. Atria Paperback.
• Bosson, J. K., Swann, W. B., & Pennebaker, J. W. (2000). Implicit and explicit self-esteem: A review of conceptualizations, measures, and controversies. European Review of Social Psychology, 11(1) , 1-63.
• Branden, N. (1995). The six pillars of self-esteem: The definitive work on self-esteem by the leading pioneer in the field. Bantam.
• Brown, B. (2010). The gifts of imperfection: Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be and embrace who you are. Hazelden.
• Brown, B. (2017). Braving the wilderness: The quest for true belonging and the courage to stand alone.   Vermilion.
• Burns, D. D. (1999). Ten days to self-esteem. William Morrow.
• Byers, G. (2018). I am enough. Blazer + Bray.
• Dalai Lama. (2009). The art of happiness. Riverhead Books.
• DeRoo, C. (2006). What’s right with me: Positive ways to celebrate your strengths, build self-esteem, and reach your potential. New Harbinger.
• Engel, B. (2007). Healing your emotional self: A powerful program to help you raise your self-esteem, quiet your inner critic, and overcome your shame. John Wiley & Sons.
• Fennell, M. (2016). Overcoming low self-esteem: A self-help guide using cognitive behavioural techniques (2nd ed.). Constable & Robinson.
• Hay, L. L. (1984). You can heal your life. Hay House.
• Hayes, S. C., & Smith, S. (2005). Get out of your mind and into your life: The new acceptance and commitment therapy. New Harbinger.
• Helmstetter, S. (2017). What to say when you talk to your self. Park Avenue Press.
• Hill, N. (2009). Think and grow rich. Sanage.
• Iscoe, K. E. (2019). Body confidence: The scientific approach to how to shine from within. MyFiziq.
• Johnson, S. (1999). Who moved my cheese? Vermilion.
• Maltz, M. (Author), & Kennedy, D. S. (Ed.). (2002). The new psycho-cybernetics. Prentice Hall Press.
• Matsuba, R. K., Fassett, K. M., & Smith, J. J. (2012). The relationship between self-concept clarity and self-esteem. Self and Identity, 11(4) , 409-427.
• Mayall, B. (2000). Get over it! How to survive break-ups, back-stabbing friends, and bad haircuts. Scholastic Paperbacks.
• Morgenstern, M. (2000). The real rules for girls. San Val.
• Moss, W. L., & Maki, D. E. (1998). Nathaniel Branden’s self-esteem theory. Journal of Counseling & Development, 76(4) , 394-404.
• Murphy, J. (2011). The power of your subconscious mind. Martino.
• Parr, T. (2009). It’s okay to be different. Little Brown Books for Young Readers.
• Peale, N. V. (2003). The power of positive thinking: A practical guide to mastering the problems of everyday living. Touchstone.
• Robbins, T. (1992). Awaken the giant within: How to take immediate control of your mental, emotional, physical and financial destiny. Simon & Schuster.
• Schwartz, D. J. (1987). The magic of thinking big. Fireside.
• Siegel, D. J. (2012).  Mindsight: Change your brain and your life. Scribe.

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What our readers think.

awesome list!

Thanks to you for publishing such an amazing article. I have trouble finding good book recommendations in one place but you listed everything in this one article.

Thank you so much, from my heart.

Thank you for your lovely list. I realised I badly needed to work on my self worth but needed a guide through the many books on the subject. Thanks to you I have whittled many down to six. So far so good. Onward and upward.

I work with women out of jail and in recovery. I also have a nine year old granddaughter that I would like to help with self esteem

Thank you so much! This is exactly what I need.

Thanks for the list. Found so many book that are helpful Which i have added to my own reading list as well.

Thanks for putting this list together! Many useful books I’ve added to my reading list 🙂

Very good list! All of your book recommandtaions articles are amazing! I would also add Kristin Neff’s books here, but other than that the list is very good.

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18 Best Self-Confidence Books Reviewed and Ranked (2021)

We also have separate book guides on  self-esteem ,  social anxiety , and  body language .

There are 18 books in this guide. To help you choose, these are my top picks. – Top pick overall – Top pick self-esteem – Top pick success in life – Top pick dealing with people – Top picks specifically geared toward women

Top pick overall

1. The Confidence Gap

Author: Russ Harris

Of all the books on confidence I’ve reviewed, this is hands down the best one. Why? It has the opposite approach to traditional pep-speech books.

It’s science-based: It helps you apply ACT ( Acceptance and Commitment Therapy ) which is well supported in hundreds of studies to make people feel significantly more self-confident.

My only critique would be that the author condemns many other methods to develop confidence that might still have some value, like visualizations. But this is a minor complaint, and it’s hands down my top recommendation for this list.

Do get this book if…

1. You want to build your overall confidence and self-esteem. 2. You dislike peppy self-help.

Do NOT get this book if…

You want a book that focuses specifically on a certain area in life. (Well, I still think you should get this one, but there are other books you can read first). See my other top picks below.

4.6 stars on Amazon .

Top pick self-esteem

2. The Self Confidence Workbook

Author: Barbara Markway

GREAT book with advice that’s been thoroughly proven in studies to build up self-esteem.

Barbara Markway is a renowned psychiatrist in the field. Even though it’s a workbook it’s not dry but encouraging and positive.

Read my review of this book in my guide on self-esteem books .

Top pick success

3. The Magic of Thinking Big

Author: David J. Schwartz

Cult book on how to set up a system for daring to think bigger and feel motivated. It’s on how to overcome fear of failure, set up goals that help you grow, and how to think positively.

This is the previous generation of self-help (And was published in 1959): Less research-based and more bravado. If you have oversight of this, it’s still a great book.

You want a confidence book specifically to be more successful in life.

You want something up-to-date, using only well-researched methods. If so, get The Confidence Gap .

4.7 stars on Amazon .

4. Psycho-Cybernetics

Author: Maxwell Maltz

This book also belongs to the previous-generation self-confidence books that lacks many of the ideas you’ll see in newer books like The Confidence Gap.

However, compared to the other old classics (like The Magic of Thinking Big or Awaken the Giant Within) this one is a bit different.

It focuses on visualization exercises. It helps you visualize yourself in a more confident state.

Later studies have backed up that there’s some truth to this. And this is still, 40 years after it was written, a well-renowned book.

Verdict: Don’t read this book INSTEAD of The Confidence Gap or The Self Confidence Workbook . But if you want to, you can read it TOGETHER with those books.

4.8 stars on Amazon .

5. Awaken the Giant Within

Author: Tony Robbins

This is a classic on self-confidence. Still, much of it builds on The Magic of Thinking Big (that came out 33 years before this one).

Verdict: Read The Magic of Thinking Big first. If you want more, or if you’re a big Tony Robbins fan, read this book.

6. The Power of Self-Confidence

Author: Brian Tracy

Another cult classic on confidence. However, like the two books above, it belongs to a previous generation of self-help that is less science-based and more about pep talk.

Verdict: This is an amazing book. But if you feel too low, it just creates a disconnect. Instead, I’d recommend any of the top books on this list first.

4.5 stars on Amazon .

Top pick on dealing with people

7. How to Have Confidence and Power in Dealing with People

Author: Leslie T. Giblin

This book is from 1956 – so it’s a 50s view on society. However, basic human psychology doesn’t change so the principles are still surprisingly well-aged.

This book is focused specifically on confidence in interacting with people. However, it’s not written for people with social anxiety but rather for those who want to improve from already being okay, and especially in a business setting.

If you’re already OK off socially and want to be more confident in business settings.

You have social anxiety or nervousness around people that holds you back. Instead, see my book guide on social anxiety .

8. The Ultimate Secrets of Total Self-Confidence

Author: Robert Anthony (Not to be confused with Anthony Roberts, hehe)

Another one of the previous generation confidence books that’s not based on science. Much of what is taught in this book is great. But it has nothing to do with science.

It talks about personal magnetism as if it was some kind of magic force. Sure, there is something we can call personal magnetism, but it comes down to acting in a way socially that people respond favorably to, not magnetic fields or quantum physics.

Verdict: If you’re OK with giving the author a pass for these ideas and just pick up on the good stuff, this book will still be a valuable investment. But before you read it, there are better books you should read, like the Confidence Gap .

4.4 stars on Amazon .

Confidence through body language

9. Presence

Author: Amy Cuddy

This is a great book on confidence, but it’s a niche that won’t be for everyone. This one doesn’t focus on that general nervosity we can feel around new people or self-doubt. It’s more about how to be confident at certain challenges like holding a speech etc. And it’s focused on her research field on power posing.

Also, there are much more actionable books on the subject.

Other research has shown that if you’re self-conscious, the idea of focusing on your posture can make you MORE self-conscious.

You’ve already read other books on self-confidence, like the ones higher up in this guide.

1. You want advice on how to be more confident around new people. 2. You are held back by self-consciousness today. Instead, read The Self-Confidence Workbook .

Confidence books specifically for women

These are the books where the author talks specifically to women.

For women in their career

10. The Confidence Effect

Author: Grace Killelea

This book focuses on how women often feel less confident than men even if they are just as competent, which has been confirmed in many studies.

Be aware that it does contain a lot of self-promotion of her company that can be annoying at times. Overall, a great book.

Verdict: This is the best book on the topic of confidence in career for women. However, I still think The Self Confidence Workbook is a better read on self-doubt. But if you want something on career, you should definitely get this one, too, as it covers work-related issues that the workbook doesn’t.

11. Wire Your Brain for Confidence

Author: Louisa Jewell

This book actually wouldn’t have had to be marketed only toward women because the science behind it is universal.

Overall, this is a great book. It focuses on positive psychology. Personally, I still prefer The Confidence Gap over this one. The reason is that this book takes some liberties in how it interprets studies that are made in one area of life and translates it straight off to another area of life.

The Confidence Gap is more thorough.

You want a positive psychology confidence book specifically for women

You want something that covers self-confidence, and self-doubt more thoroughly. If so, rather go with The Confidence Gap .

4.2 stars on Amazon .

For women in the middle of their career

12. The Confidence Code

Authors: Katty Kay, Claire Shipman

This is a good book even though it’s clinical and can be a tough read. The main idea is that women have less self-confidence than men and that it’s 50% genetics and 50% in your control.

The book seems to fit women in mid-life best.

You’re a woman in mid-life who are interested in the theory behind confidence

You want a pure step-by-step guide. If so, get The Self Confidence Workbook .

For young girls

13. The Confidence Code for Girls

Author: Katty Kay

This book is specifically for girls in their tweens and teens. It has stellar reviews and is one of the best-ranked books during my research. Research-based.

Verdict: If you have a young daughter and want to help her improve her self-confidence, get this book.

Honorary mentions

14. the art of extraordinary confidence.

Author: Aziz Gazipura

This book starts off OK but just doesn’t deliver. It’s too rudimentary, like if he’d hired a freelancer to just finish the book.

Verdict: There’s for sure some valuable advice in this book, but there are much better books on the topic (Like the ones I recommend earlier in this guide)

15. Confidence Hacks

Author: Barrie Davenport

This is a list of 99 pieces of advice on how to be more confident. Because each tip is just a 200-word nugget, it doesn’t go in-depth into anything.

Verdict: If you really love lists and don’t want to commit to something more in-depth, sure, get this book. But be aware that it doesn’t have the same potency as the book at the beginning of this guide.

3.62 stars on Goodreads. Amazon .

16. You Are a Badass

Author: Jen Sincero

This book targets millennial women and encourages them to be more assertive and get what they want. It’s high on pep and low on well-researched strategies.

Verdict: If you dread workbooks and want something easy to consume with a sassy language, I think you can appreciate this book. However, if you do follow the principles of, say, the Confidence Gap , I’m certain that you’ll come out a more confident person at the other end.

Books to be cautious about

These are books that have little evidence of working.

17. Ultimate Confidence

Author: Marisa Peer

I know that a lot of people like this book, but it’s based on the idea that you can hypnotize yourself into confidence.

There’s just no evidence for that you can become permanently confident through hypnosis. Yes, she has great reviews, but she’s also written a book on how to hypnotize yourself into losing weight.

In-between the pseudo-science there’s some good advice. But if you want to be confident, there are much better books.

18. Instant Confidence

Author: Paul McKenna.

Another popular hypnosis book. The author claims that hypnosis will make you confident.

However, I can’t find any study that shows an effect beyond placebo.

But if you believe in it and you feel more confident (even if it’s just placebo) it has still helped you, so why not.

However, CBT and ACT are proven in hundreds of studies to work, so I’d go with that instead. (With for example The Confidence Gap or The Confidence Workbook)

Beyond the hypnosis part, the book does contain some valuable advice, but nothing you won’t find in any other self-help book.

This author has also written the books “I can make you rich”, “I can make you thin”, “I can make you happy” and “I can make you sleep”, which to me makes him less trustworthy. I prefer books written by experts that focus on a specific area.

Is there any book that you think I should review? Let me know in the comments below!

David Morin is the founder of SocialSelf. He's been writing about social skills since 2012. Follow on Twitter or read more .

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Create a Life You Love

17 Best Books for Self-Esteem, Self-Confidence, and Self-Worth

July 4, 2023 by Mick

Reading the best books on self-esteem provides new perspectives and practical strategies to build unbreakable confidence.

I used this knowledge to overcome self-doubt too.

Although books never substitute action, understanding the principles and tactics to improve self-confidence increases effectiveness.

The books that made it through the selection process provide a unique perspective. That’s why I categorized the best books on self-confidence to help you address your specific issue:

• Best overall book on self-esteem: The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem
• Best overall book to build confidence: The Confidence Gap
• Best self-confidence book for women: The Confidence Code
• Best workbook on confidence: The Self-Confidence Workbook
• Best for more self-compassion: Self-Compassion
• Best for vulnerability and courage: Daring Greatly
• Best book to overcome fear: Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway
• Best book to develop self-love: You Can Heal Your Life
• Best counterintuitive approach: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
• Best book for inner peace: The Art of Happiness
• Best for personal empowerment: You Are a Badass
• Best for positive self-talk: What to Say When You Talk to Your Self
• Best for personal freedom: The Four Agreements
• Best for self-discovery: The Happiness Project
• Best in non-verbal communication: Presence
• Best for creative confidence: Big Magic
• Best confidence book for introverts: Quiet

Do you prefer the audiobook version?

Read my comprehensive review of Audible .

Now, let’s dive in!

#1: The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

Book summary: The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem is a comprehensive guide that dives into the six essential elements for building and maintaining self-esteem. You’ll gain insights and exercises to enhance your self-worth, boost confidence, and create a fulfilling life.

Who’s this book for: Anyone looking to improve and strengthen their self-worth should read this book. It’s the best self-esteem book on this list to lay a solid foundation.

About the author: Nathaniel Branden, PhD, was a psychologist who dedicated his career to understanding and promoting the importance of self-esteem in personal development.

Get your copy here

#2: The Confidence Gap

Book summary: The Confidence Gap presents evidence-based techniques from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to help you overcome self-doubt and fear. ACT empowers you to live a more fulfilling life by accepting difficulties and challenges and developing a commitment to act in alignment with your values.

Who’s this book for: Anyone who seeks more self-confidence benefits from this book. You’ll learn practical and proven strategies to overcome self-doubt, develop self-belief, and conquer your fears.

About the authors: Russ Harris and Steven Hayes are psychologists and experts in ACT. They dedicated their careers to improving people’s mental well-being and helping them overcome psychological challenges.

#3: The Confidence Code

Book summary: The Confidence Code explores the psychology and science behind self-confidence. The book provides practical strategies and insights to help women build their confidence and excel in various aspects of life, including work and relationships.

Who’s this book for: Women who want to understand, develop, and explore the dynamics of confidence in different areas of life will love this book.

About the authors: Katty Kay and Claire Shipman are accomplished journalists who extensively researched women’s issues. In this book, they combine their experience and expertise to empower women.

#4: The Self-Confidence Workbook

Book summary: The Self Confidence Workbook provides an effective step-by-step approach to help you build confidence. You’ll gain practical exercises and techniques to identify and challenge self-doubt, develop self-compassion, and cultivate a strong sense of self-esteem.

Who’s this book for: The self-confidence workbook is great if you prefer an active learning style and seek a structured guide to improve your self-esteem.

About the author: Barbara Markway, PhD, is a psychologist with years of experience in clinical practice, specifically on confidence. Co-author Celia Ampel is a psychology writer and researcher.

#5: Self-Compassion

Book summary: Self-Compassion presents a transformative approach to self-care, guiding you to cultivate self-acceptance and embrace your imperfections with kindness. The author shows how self-compassion leads to greater resilience, well-being, and personal fulfillment through research-based practices and personal anecdotes.

Who’s this book for: Do you struggle with self-criticism? Then you’ll love this book to build a more compassionate relationship with yourself and improve your emotional well-being.

About the author: Kristin Neff, PhD, is a leading researcher and expert in self-compassion. She dedicated her work to promoting self-compassion as a powerful tool for healing and personal growth.

#6: Daring Greatly

Book summary: Daring Greatly explores the concept of vulnerability and encourages you to embrace it as a path to courage and fulfillment. The author’s research and personal stories highlight the power of being vulnerable to foster meaningful connections, creativity, and resilience.

Who’s this book for: Look no further if you want to develop the courage to be vulnerable. Embracing vulnerability unlocks authenticity, connects you more deeply with others, and makes you more resilient in uncertainty and shame.

About the author: Brené Brown, PhD, is a researcher, storyteller, and public speaker. Her work on vulnerability, courage, and shame led to significant insights into our emotions and connections.

#7: Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway

Book summary: Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway offers practical advice and empowering insights to, you guessed it, overcome your fears. This book provides tools to shift your perception, challenge self-limiting beliefs, and develop the courage to take action despite fear.

Who’s this book for: Fear keeps most people from achieving their dreams. And this book will help you overcome fear and hesitation to unlock new opportunities on your personal and professional journey.

About the author: Susan Jeffers, PhD, was a psychologist and self-help author. Her empowering message of facing fears and living a courageous life inspired millions of people worldwide.

#8: You Can Heal Your Life

Book summary: You Can Heal Your Life introduces positive affirmations and self-love as powerful tools to heal and transform yourself. It provides unique insights to let go of limiting beliefs and create a life filled with love, joy, and abundance.

Who’s this book for: This self-esteem book is a great choice if you seek self-healing, personal empowerment, and a deeper understanding of the mind-body connection for self-confidence.

About the author: Louise Hay was an author and motivational speaker known for her transformative work in the self-help field.

#9: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

Book summary: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck challenges conventional wisdom and encourages you to focus on what truly matters in life. The author offers thought-provoking ideas on embracing life’s uncertainties, defining your personal values, and finding meaning in a world obsessed with superficial success.

Who’s this book for: Do you want a refreshing and counterintuitive perspective on happiness, confidence, and authentic living? Then this book is for you. Although it’s not directly about building confidence, it provides unique insights that helped me develop more self-esteem. 

About the author: Mark Manson is a bestselling author and blogger known for his straightforward and unfiltered approach to personal development. His work encourages you to confront uncomfortable truths and live in alignment with your core values.

#10: The Art of Happiness

Book summary: The Art of Happiness combines the wisdom of the Dalai Lama with the insights of psychiatrist Howard Cutler to explore the keys to lasting happiness. In other words, you gain Eastern perspectives with Western reflections. Their discussions on compassion, mindfulness, and inner peace offer practical advice for finding confidence, joy, and fulfillment in everyday life.

Who’s this book for: You’ll love this book if you’re drawn to Eastern ideologies and want to incorporate its principles on compassion and mindfulness into your life. I loved this refreshing read on happiness and inner peace – providing perspectives to increase your self-esteem.

About the authors: The Dalai Lama is the spiritual leader of Tibet, widely respected for his teachings on compassion and peace. Howard Cutler, MD, is a psychiatrist who collaborated with the Dalai Lama to bring his teachings to a wider audience.

#11: You Are a Badass

Book summary: You Are a Badass is a motivational and humorous guide encouraging you to embrace your inner power and overcome self-doubt. You’ll learn practical strategies and transformative exercises to unlock your potential and create your desired outcomes.

Who’s this book for: This is the best book on self-confidence if you seek personal empowerment. The book offers a simple but effective way to transform your mindset, boost confidence, and pursue your goals.

About the author: Jen Sincero is a bestselling author and success coach known for her no-nonsense approach to personal development.

#12: What to Say When You Talk to Your Self

Book summary: What to Say When You Talk to Your Self explores the power of positive self-talk and its impact on success. You’ll learn how your internal dialogue shapes your beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors. And how you can reprogram your subconscious mind for positive change.

Who’s this book for: Struggling with negative self-talk? This book teaches you how to harness the power of positive self-talk to improve your self-esteem and unlock greater personal and professional success.

About the author: Shad Helmstetter, PhD, is a self-help author and behavioral researcher. He specialized in the study of self-talk and its influence on our behavior.

#13: The Four Agreements

Book summary: The Four Agreements present powerful principles to achieve greater personal freedom and happiness. These ideas stem from the ancient Toltecs, an indigenous civilization known for their wisdom, artistry, and spiritual teachings.

Who’s this book for: Are you looking for the best self-esteem book with a spiritual touch? Then you’ll love this option. Learn how to break free from self-limiting beliefs, create meaningful relationships, and live an authentic and fulfilling life.

About the author: Don Miguel Ruiz is an author and spiritual teacher. Drawing from his Toltec heritage, he shares their teachings and tools to help you transform yourself and live in alignment with your true self.

#14: The Happiness Project

Book summary: The Happiness Project is about the author’s year-long journey to explore various strategies to increase happiness. The book provides practical daily tips for finding joy, gratitude, and purpose.

Who’s this book for: Self-discovery leads to self-understanding. And greater self-awareness enables you to align your life with what matters most to you. So this option is the best book on self-esteem if you struggle with who you are and the direction for your life.

About the author: Gretchen Rubin is a bestselling author and happiness expert. Her unique blend of research and experiences made her a leading voice in positive psychology, focused on living a more meaningful existence.

#15: Presence

Book summary: Presence explores how embodying your personal power and adopting expansive body language can enhance confidence and influence. The author combines scientific research, personal stories, and practical advice to help you unleash your authentic self, overcome self-doubt, and succeed in challenging situations.

Who’s this book for: Your body language is a powerful tool to build confidence and increase your presence. And you’ll love this book to excel in high-pressure situations such as job interviews, public speaking, and social interactions.

About the author: Amy Cuddy is a social psychologist specializing in nonverbal behavior and its impact on emotions, thoughts, and behavior. She also gave one of the most viewed TED Talks .

#16: Big Magic

Book summary: Big Magic guides you to embrace creativity and live a more fulfilling and vibrant life. You’ll gain insight and practical advice to overcome your fears, tap into your creative potential, and pursue a life driven by curiosity and passion.

Who’s this book for: Many creatives struggle with confidence. And this is the best book on self-esteem if that sounds like you. Reading this book helps you overcome creative blocks and live a more expressive life.

About the author: Elizabeth Gilbert is best known for her bestselling memoir “Eat, Pray, Love.” Her captivating storytelling and insightful reflections empower you to embrace your creative journey fueled by curiosity, courage, and authenticity.

Book summary: Quiet explores the power and value of introversion in a society that favors extroverted traits. The book contains research and interviews that shed light on the strengths and contributions of introverts. You’ll also gain insights for deeper self-understanding and strategies to thrive in an extrovert-oriented world.

Who’s this book for: You may struggle with confidence as an introvert like I did. And it’s only when you accept and appreciate your strengths that your life will change. I wish I had read this book in my teenage years.

About the author: Susan Cain is an author, speaker, and advocate for introverts. Her work sparked global conversations about introversion and its value in various aspects of life, including work and relationships.

What’s next?

These are the best books on self-esteem and confidence today, providing fundamental insights and exercises. 

Reading these books leads to deeper self-understanding, a broader perspective, a healthier mindset, and practical tools for action.

Knowledge provides an excellent starting point. 

But you only build unbreakable confidence through action. So ensure you take action on the advice in these books. Start small. And take on bigger challenges and fears as you become more confident.

Here are additional resources to inspire consistent action:

• Best guided journals with prompts
• Course: Double Your Confidence & Self Esteem
• Audiobooks: Audible (get a free 30-day trial)

In addition, check out the best confidence building courses for adults .

And if you want more valuable insights and guidance to live a fulfilling and authentic life, then sign up for the weekly newsletter below to receive my best stuff straight into your inbox.

Mick is a personal growth enthusiast and was able to use it to transform his life. He now helps others pursue their dreams, create positive change, and build better lives through self-improvement.

20 BEST BOOKS ON CONFIDENCE TO SKYROCKET YOUR SELF-ESTEEM

Self-confidence is a key component of success. In fact, the lack of self-confidence is something many people point to when they feel like they aren’t succeeding in their relationships, career, or at life in general. It’s for this reason that I felt compelled to create this particular post on self confidence books.

Because let’s admit it.  At one time or another we’ve all blamed ourselves and our lack of confidence for why something didn’t go as planned in our life.

It could have been that date that didn’t go so well, the botched job interview, or even that business deal that fell through.  Whatever the case may be, most of the time it was a lack of confidence that was the culprit.

We say to ourselves, “I just don’t have enough confidence.” But that’s not true. 

It’s not true, because confidence is not something we have, rather, it is something we create. So, a better way to phrase our challenges with confidence would be, “I just can’t create enough confidence right now.” Here’s why…

CONFIDENCE IS A CHOICE

Confidence is a state of mind, a feeling, and a way of being that can be created at will. So, in a way, it’s a choice.

When you come to understand this, you’ll be able to turn on your confidence at a moment’s notice.  And when you know how to do this, you’ll start finding more of the success you seek.

Now I can tell you this truth over and over again until I am blue in the face, but, it will never be real to you until you’ve deeply ingrained this fact into your own mind.

And the best way to ingrain this fact into your own mind, is to become a student of confidence . Now you don’t have to sign up for college courses to become a student of confidence.

To become a student of confidence all you have to do is… read.  You must read and study books on the subject of confidence.

Simple right?  So where should you start?

Start with this list.  I’ve pulled together a list of the best books on building self-confidence that I’ve ever come across.  No doubt, there are hundreds of books on confidence, but let’s be honest, who (aside from Ph.D. students) has the time to read hundreds of books on a single topic?

Exactly, hardly anyone!

So, if you want to master confidence and improve your self-esteem,  just read a handful of the following books recommended on confidence and you should be good to go.  You don’t have to read hundreds of books on confidence to learn the fundamentals.  Trust me, this handful of books will do the trick.

Every book provides something different, yet, every single one also confirms what I just said…

Which is, that how confident you become is completely up to you, because confidence is all in your head . So, behold the 20 books you must read if you ever wish to master self-confidence:

BEST BOOKS ON CONFIDENCE

Note:  We’re reader-supported. If you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission.

1. Feel The Fear and Do it Anyway

‘Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway’ is a classic book by the late Dr. Susan Jeffers.  In this book, Susan Jeffers offers up solid advice for overcoming the paralysis and inaction that stems from being fearful and lacking confidence.  Susan Jeffers pulls her knowledge from many years of research, and lecturing on the topic of transforming fear, indecision, and even anger into power, action, and extreme confidence.

The book contains a handful of practical insights and exercises that you can immediately implement to help you come to the realization that confidence is something to be nurtured and cultivated, much like a muscle.

This book is both an eye-opener and a solid book to begin with on your journey towards building your confidence. So, if you’re in need a book that can deliver a solid dose of boldness, read this book.

2. How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

Fear, doubt, and worry can be debilitating.  Possessing just one of these problems can indeed stop the best of us from reaching the heights of success we seek.

How so?  Because fear and doubt kills self-confidence. And a lack of self-confidence kills action. And if success demands anything, it demands that we have enough self-confidence to take appropriate action.

That said, this book is comprised of many recipes Mr. Carnegie pulled together from night classes he would teach to adult students on how to overcome worry so they can get busy living.

‘How to Start Worrying and Start Living’ is a cure for anyone who wishes to eliminate the debilitating effects of fear and worry from their lives, so they fortify their confidence and get on with succeeding in their life.

3. Unstoppable Confidence

This book touches on NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) to help you get out of your comfort zone and master your self-confidence.    If you are unfamiliar with NLP, it is basically a scientific approach to communication, personal development, and psychotherapy that delivers practical ways in which you can change the way you think, view past events, and approach your life.

NLP is huge in sales world, as it is needed by many to fortify their minds against constant rejection.

Much of this book uses ideas and concepts that Tony Robbins suggests for improving self-confidence, and they’ll work for you too.  ‘Unstoppable Confidence’ can teach you how to harness confidence levels that will make you, well… unstoppable.

4. Think and Grow Rich

‘Think and Grow Rich’ is so much more than a confidence book, it is a success book.  However, the author, Napoleon Hill, understood that success requires a strong foundation built on self-confidence.

As such, the book provides a handful of potent insights and formulas that can help you gain the confidence you’ll need to start growing more successful, and yes even richer in your life.

This book is a must read for every person.  If you practice his self-confidence formula alone , you can dramatically improve your confidence in no time at all.

5. How to Talk to Anyone

Many people are confident in just about everything they do.  But for some people, when it comes to talking to people, they clam up, get anxious, and come across as less than self-assured.

If you’ve ever felt a lack of confidence when communicating with colleagues, strangers, or the opposite sex, this book can help you with crushing those feelings of uncertainty. Not only does this book educate on the nuances of confidence, but it gives you practical and effective tactics that you can employ immediately that will make you appear poised and self-assured, even if you’re not 100% there mentally. In other words, this book will help you fake it till you make it.

Having confidence when speaking with people is one of the most important skills you could acquire for successfully navigating your way to the top of your career.  So, if you know your confidence lacks in the ‘people department’ then you must read this book.

6. The Magic of Thinking Big

David Schwartz Ph.D . has created a masterful book with ‘The Magic of Thinking Big’ , which is why over 6 million copies of the book have been sold.

In this book, Dr. Schwartz touches on many key areas that we all need to improve on to start succeeding in life.  Much of the book revolves around improving how you think about situations, people, and your future.  It deals with how to improve you attitude and perspectives, which in turn will help you to start taking the action necessary to reach your BIG goals.

Chapters 3 ‘Build Confidence and Destroy Fear’, Chapter 10 ‘Get the Action Habit’, Chapter 11 ‘How to Turn Defeat into Victory’, and Chapter 13 ‘How to Think Like a Leader’ are the most effective chapters for building your self-confidence.

All in all, this is one of my favorite self confidence books, and its probably the one confidence building book you can’t afford to miss.

7. How to Develop Self-Confidence and Influence People by Public Speaking

Dale Carnegie has created the perfect toolset for helping people dial into their confidence at will.  This book contains multiple confidence boosting tips that will help you acquire poise, increase your memory, improve the delivery of your message, and appear more charming to everyone you interact with.

This book was created to teach people how to overcome their fears of public speaking; however, the strategies he provides to help you increase your confidence to speak in front of large audiences can also be applied towards overcoming other confidence issues in other areas of your life.

How you ask?  Because when you master public speaking, you simultaneously wipe out your timidity and gain the courage and assurance to deal with people.  In short, confidence gained in one department will help you gain the confidence you may need in others.

8. You Are a Badass

‘You Are a Badass’ by Jen Sincero, is not specifically geared towards improving confidence; however, it covers a wide range of self-improvement topics that when combined, can help you strengthen your over all sense of self, and with that, your confidence.

Within the book there is a chapter specifically for confidence, titled, ‘Fear Is For Suckers’.  This chapter provides some great perspectives on fear and confidence that can help you significantly boost your confidence.

9. Presence

Amy Cuddy is the famous TED talk professor who first acquainted us with power poses and using our physiology to increase our confidence levels.

Well, she helps deliver a similar message in this book, and she does it with detail and backs it all up with solid research.

When you read this book, be prepared to learn about the power of your personal story, how to overcome impostor syndrome, and how to utilize you posture to level up your confidence.

As a student of confidence, this is one book you won’t want to miss .

10. The Confidence Gap

This book is a great confidence book to compliment the others already mentioned.  This book does what it says, it fills the confidence gap.

How does it do this?  Well, it does this by giving the readers a different perspective on dealing with their confidence or lack thereof.  Russ Harris offers a novel solution to confidence by encouraging you to form a different relationship with your confidence, instead of trying to force yourself to overcome your confidence limitations.

In this book you will learn about the power of mindfulness and some techniques for keeping your negative thoughts and feelings at bay so your confidence levels can soar.

This book is certainly worth the read and it will truly help fill some of the confidence gaps we all face .

11. The Power of Self-Confidence

Brian Tracy is a seasoned sales/business guru who knows a thing or two about success.  Truth is, it is hard to lose with Brian Tracy in your corner.  He’s pushed out countless resources ranging from self-discipline, to time-management, to self-confidence.

And in just about all of his resources, you’ll hear him mention the importance of your inner-game, of your mindset and how you feel about yourself.

Without a doubt, this book will help you understand why it is so essential to have faith in your abilities and believe in yourself.

Read this book and build the unshakable confidence you know deep down in your heart you are capable of wielding.

12. The Art of Extraordinary Confidence

Comfort is the kiss of death to success.  And in this book, you will learn why.

As such, you’ll find plenty of admonishments in this book to step outside of your comfort zone, and in so doing, dramatically strengthen your confidence levels.

If you are okay with real-talk, truth, and zero punches being pulled, you will enjoy this book.  Beware though, this is not a PG book.  It will speak to you as an adult, so be prepared for a good push .

13. The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

This book will wake you up to what true confidence is all about.  Author, Nathaniel Branden provides firm answers to questions we all have related to our confidence and self-esteem.

If you’re looking for answers, you’ll find them here.  You’ll learn what self-esteem really is, you’ll learn why it is so important to cultivate it, how you can increase your own self-esteem levels, and what role our external environment (other people) plays in our confidence levels.

Without a doubt, you’ll be sure to find many ‘Aha!’ moments in this book, and a solid foundation to building up your self-esteem , and with it, your confidence.

Related: Become an Extrovert, Even If Shy

14. Unleash The Warrior Within

‘Unleash The Warrior Within’ is authored by former Navy SEAL Richard Machowicz.  And as you’d suspect, he provides tons of confidence boosting strategies that he acquired from his time in the military.

Richard has you break down your fears into smaller, bite sized components, making them much easier to attack.  He also spends time educating his readers on the importance of mindset.

As a fan of the warrior ethos , I enjoy how the author combats those areas of our lives that can hold us back and keep us from doing what we need to do most to achieve our goals.   If you want more confidence, read this book, you can’t go wrong.

15. Psycho-Cybernetics

Don’t let the name of this book scare you.  It may sound daunting and super scientific, but rest assured that the material contained within it will be easy to digest and better yet, easy to implement towards building up your self-confidence.

The author of the book, Maxwell Maltz holds a Ph.D. and lays out his years of his experience and observation on how powerful our self-image is when it comes to helping us achieve the results we are after. 

You’ll learn about the power of perception, self-esteem, and how large a role our own self-image can play in our ability to achieve. In addition to this, you’ll learn some powerful strategies you can employ to immediately and positively impact your confidence levels. 

So, If you’re looking for a time tested book on confidence that is based in science, this is a book everyone should read .

16.  The Power of Positive Thinking

I know what your thinking, what does positive thinking have to do with Confidence.  But here me out.  This book, with out a doubt belongs in this selection of the best books on confidence because of the wisdom provided chapter after chapter by the late great Norman Vincent Peale specifically for helping its readers lead a more positive and confident life.

Now, just as a heads up, the wisdom provided in this great book does have religious undertones too them; however, this is exactly where much of the power of this book comes in to play.  So, if you are not religious, or don’t care for biblical references you can skip this book and read all the others, BUT, I assure you, you’ll be cutting yourself short if you do so.  If you’ve read all the confidence books in the world, and yet you still feel like you are coming up short in the confidence department, well then you’ll definitely want to invest in this book.  It WILL help your conquer your confidence and self-esteem challenges and instill in you the faith to conquer your internal/external fears .

17.  Negative Self-Talk and How to Change It

This is a great book to add to your library of books that can help you boost your confidence levels.  The premise of the books revolves around what negative self-talk is, why you should work to minimize the amount of it you do, and how to go about doing so.

It really is a great tool/book to consider for helping you build your confidence because of the important role our self-talk plays in how we feel about ourselves.  Essentially, lots of negative self-talk leads to feeling less confident and less negative self-talk essentially leads to feeling more confident.

As such, this is a worthy book to own to help you get a handle on your negative inner voice, and as a result, positively improve your confidence levels.

18. The 5 Second Rule

Mel Robbins brings a whole new definition to confidence in this book . She’ll help dispel the myth the confidence is merely a lack of belief in yourself, but rather, it’s the willingness or unwillingness to try.

Without a doubt, you’ll walk away from this book realizing that confidence is related to action. And you’ll begin to realize that confidence doesn’t start with belief, but rather, confidence starts with action. And since Mel’s book is primarily about action, we could not deny adding her book to our invaluable list of books on confidence.

So, use this book to push yourself to be better than your excuses and bigger than your fears.

19. Daring Greatly

Brené Brown’s Daring Greatly is the wake up call we all need. She doesn’t pull any punches and definitely tells it like it is in this book. Which is why it made the cut for our no B.S. list of self-confidence books. The biggest take away you’ll get from this book is that it is okay to be vulnerable. Her book provides a great combination of solid research and casual storytelling that will help you ease into being more being more vulnerable. And the more vulnerable you allow yourself to be, the more confident you’ll become as you come to realize you can handle whatever it is life is happening to throw your way.

So, if you’re looking for a book to dare you to step outside of your comfort zone, to be bigger than your anxieties, and to get you living and leading more confidently, then this book is a must read .

20. Never Finished

This last book is not your typical confidence book. It doesn’t give you tips or strategies to specifically zero-in on your confidence. In fact, Goggins states it himself in the book, it’s not a self-help book. But, what this book does do, is it helps you reframe your thinking.

‘Never Finished’ provides insight after insight to help you see yourself in a different light. It also includes stories that demonstrate that you are more than you are, and that you can do more than you’ve done. All in all, the lessons within this book will improve your mental strength and ultimately help you become aware of your true potential.

So give this book a read if you’re serious about building up your confidence, because there’s nothing more confident than a mentally strong person who believes in their abilities and their limitless potential.

Bonus Confidence Resource

‘Go Fearless’ is a synthesis of the best confidence building strategies from many of the self confidence books just mentioned.  After going from outgoing and confident to feeling shy and withdrawn for many years, I set out to re-discover the confidence and fearlessness I had in my youth.  After learning how to bounce back into the outgoing and confident person I knew I was capable of being, I decided to share what I learned.

This resource does not waste your time with drawn out stories or background, it gives you exactly what you need to know, NOW, so you can get started on building your confidence ASAP.

If there were ever a shortcut to learning how to master self-confidence, this would be it.  It’s a confidence building tool, and a true call to action. And the best thing about it, is it’s free.

So, if you’re looking for a no B.S. guide to help you start living your life with confidence, go read this free resource and ‘ Become Fearless ’!  Your future self will thank you for it.

Check out this solid list of books I found.  If you’re looking for a few books to help you boost your confidence, these will help! TheSTRIVE.co Tweet This

Final Words on These Self Confidence Books

There you have it, the 20 best books you can read to get started on mastering the one thing that can make all the difference in how much success you’ll find in your life; confidence.

After you’ve read these books for self-confidence, you’ll realize that having a sense of confidence is nothing but a sense of power within yourself, a sense of certainty that you can pull off just about anything.

Read this collection of the best books on confidence and you’ll surely gain the understanding and awareness that you actually have power to create a more confident you at any moment in time.

Till you reach your aims,

PS – If you’ve enjoyed this collection of confidence books, then you’ll most likely also enjoy this piece on ‘The 7 Ways to Gain Instant Confidence’.

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10 STRATEGIES ON HOW TO BECOME FEARLESS AND CONFIDENT

If you’re searching for effective strategies on how to become fearless and confident in yourself then this article is for you. However, before we provide those strategies, it’s important to know that we all have choices to make in this life, and some of those choices are constant. We all must choose on a daily basis, between shirking opportunities for growth and expansion, or leaning in to face our challenges fearlessly with full acceptance of the outcome.

Choosing the former leads to stagnation, less freedom, less happiness and ultimately unfulfilled potential. While on the other hand, the latter leads to more joy, freedom, abundance, and potential fulfilled.

“THE SECRET TO HAPPINESS IS FREEDOM…AND THE SECRET TO FREEDOM IS COURAGE.” –  THUCYDIDES  –

Without a doubt, there are fears and doubts that keep the majority of people living out their lives in quiet desperation, only to go to their graves with their gifts, dreams, talents, and aspirations still left inside of them. In fact, the late Wayne Dyer once stated, “The number one regret of the dying is ‘I wish I had the courage to live the life I wanted rather than doing what others wanted of me.’”

Thus, it is for this line of reasoning that we decided to publish this resource, to provide you with actionable strategies that you can use to build confidence in yourself. The type of confidence that would allow for you to to live life fearlessly starting today.

With that being said, after researching numerous books, and experimenting with a variety of different tools, (meditation, affirmations, guided visualizations, hypnosis etc…) we discovered a handful of best-practices that you can immediately employ to start building confidence in yourself quickly.

We’re confident, that if you attempt to conquer your fears using the insights provided on this page with complete commitment, you will begin to experience noticeable progress in your self-belief, confidence, and your ability take more action.

In other words, you will become more confident, fearless, and thus more inclined to transform yourself into the type of action-taker your dreams require you to be.

So, if you’re ready to learn about the 10 best strategies for becoming fearless and confident in yourself starting today, let’s dive right in:

HOW TO BE FEARLESS AND CONFIDENT IN YOURSELF

1. BELIEVE (HAVE FAITH) IN YOURSELF

This first confidence-building strategy simply consists of having faith in yourself. We understand that this may seem difficult to do. But once we show you the why behind how this works, you may just become inclined to make your leap of faith.

This “why” that we’re referring to consists of a simple process. It’s only one process, but we aim to illustrate it in two different ways.  Thus, the two diagrams below are meant to inform you, as well as act as an incentive to encourage you to continue using the other strategies we will be providing to you. 

With that said, both of these diagrams are important to comprehend, but the diagram that is best to keep in mind as you utilize the other strategies we’ll be recommending, is this first one, Diagram 1 . 

We suggest that it is kept at the forefront of your mind, and used as a foundation as you strengthen your confidence muscles. We recommend this because of the substantial life enhancing effects that can result from you believing that you can become not just uber-confident, but fearless.

So, without further ado, here is the first diagram, your foundation, and your strong reason as to why you should become fearless.

DIAGRAM 1: 

This diagram (see on next page) is a model for life enhancement.  When we comprehend how this model impacts our life, we can equip ourselves with the conviction that is needed to jumpstart our intentions for facing our fears. 

The model demonstrates how you can actually decide to crush your fears, and take steps to continually suppress those fears, while at the same time setting yourself up for future success.

When you observe the model on the next page you will notice that it is cyclical.  You should also take note, that the model spirals in a direction that is toward a stronger, increasingly improved you, which naturally translates into a brighter future for you.  

You’ll notice when looking at this model (especially in comparison to the second diagram provided just after this one) the word ‘Increased’ . 

This entire model is impacted by the decision to increase our belief that we can become fearless, and an increase in our belief of ourselves.  As a result, a bigger brighter, more fulfilled future can ensue.  

The premise of the model is this: If you force yourself to have certainty about your abilities, an absolute belief that you can handle whatever it is you are undertaking, you will place in motion a positive life enhancing process. 

When you decide to increase your belief that you can do something, you will influence your potential for actually being able to do that thing well.

Having the sense that you have increased potential to accomplish something, you will in effect be more likely to take (increased) action to fulfill that potential. As you begin taking more action, and doing so with full faith in your potential and ability to execute flawlessly, you will begin to get better results.

Having these improved results will reinforce your belief in yourself, and in your abilities.  In turn, the whole process will restart anew, and every recurring time, it will be from an even stronger, more confident position.

In summary :   with a decision to believe in one’s self, one’s potential to execute will increase.  Consequently, one will be inclined to take even more action, whereby, one will inevitably see more improved results.  As time goes on, this process will compound all results.  Therefore, it is vital to begin from a position of belief, to get onto the path towards living fearlessly.

DIAGRAM 2: 

Diagram 2 is very similar to Diagram 1, just illustrated above.  This diagram was included primarily to provide additional context in relation to the power of belief.  Its purpose is to demonstrate what the opposite effects are, if we get started on the wrong foot.

This diagram, unlike Diagram 1, is on a negative spiraling path towards a diminishing life.   It is different in that it consists of a cycle of decrease.  In essence, when we allow for things, people, or our own negative opinion of ourselves to negatively impact our belief in ourselves and our abilities, we will inevitably experience a level of diminishment in our potential.

Through this feeling of diminished capabilities, we will in effect act less on the fulfillment of our goals.  Like most people, when something seems futile, we are less inclined to persevere.  As a perfect example of cause and effect, our lack of action (or our half-hearted action) leads to substandard results.

And the cycle goes on.  Those less than stellar results reinforce our lack of belief in ourselves (again), which as a result decreases our outlook on our potential even more so.  In turn, this ultimately reduces even further, our desire to act, yet again bringing even worse results, etc.

This phase can go on indefinitely to eventual physical, spiritual, and professional defeat. Something we do not want for you, or anyone.

The most critical aspect to take away from this strategy to build confidence in yourself (considering both diagrams), is that it is critical that we start all of our undertakings from a place of belief.

If you begin having any doubts as you implement any of our other strategies, or begin to feel your inner cynic start to come out, just come back to this first strategy and simply reacquaint yourself until you are ready to move forward with faith.

It is vitally important that you believe you can actually learn how to become more confident.  It is important to believe that you can do amazing things, because without belief, you can not, nor ever will, become a fearless version of your former self.

So, first things first, have faith in yourself!

“IF YOU MUST DOUBT SOMETHING, DOUBT YOUR LIMITS.” –  PRICE PRITCHETT  –

2. INTERNALIZE THESE 6 TRUTHS

This next confidence boosting strategy consists of six very important truths that when deeply understood, can assist you in the easing of your apprehensions. [1]  

We suggest you attempt to internalize these truths.  By doing so, you will be conditioning your mind to release the stress that you may have built up around your fears and apprehensions in the past. Here they are:

• Fear and angst never goes away fully, not as long as we are growing, stretching, and striving for more.  Fear, angst, and uneasiness then, is but a natural consequence of striving.
• To start feeling confident and good about ourselves, we have to take some type of definitive steps/actions to improve the situation or ourselves.
• The only way to get rid of the fear or angst of doing something is to go out and do that thing which which is causing us unease.
• Fear and doubt art things that is experienced by everyone.  To be human, is to fearful and doubtful. Fear and doubt are natural byproducts of growth; it’s a byproduct of placing ourselves in unfamiliar territory, outside of our comfort zones.   We are all human, and thus we all experience fear and doubt.
• Living with the regret and the feeling of helplessness the stems from not tackling your fears or seeking to suppress your doubts, is more frightening than having decided to face your fears head on.
• The more attention we give to our fears without doing something to combat them, the stronger they will grow, and the more paralyzed you’ll feel when you decide to conquer them.

Speaking these six truths out loud whenever fear begins to creep up in our mind, can do wonders for quelling any anxiousness we may be feeling.

It’s like preparing for a big game or battle against a worthy opponent.  The more you know about your opponent, the less frightening it is.  The less frightening the opponent appears, the more willing we are to face it.

3. PRACTICE THESE SIX ACTIONS TO BUILD CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF

There are six practical actions will be helpful for you to keep in your ‘back pocket’ so-to-speak, so they can be easily accessed when the time comes for proactively building confidence in yourself.

This step, also includes a diagram that conveys how taking action works toward curing our fears.

It is critical to know, that action builds confidence and cures fear.  As such, find a way to isolate your fears.  Once you do this, you can then begin to take constructive action to face those fears.  Taking action on the thing you fear most is highly effective.  If you don’t take action, your fears will grow.

Project (or force) your confidence.  Here are some ways to do this:

a. Force yourself to sit in the front row of your training classes, sit nearest the boss in meetings, put yourself out there, etc.

b. Speak up.  Participate.  Engage.

c. Make sure you make and keep eye contact with everyone with whom you speak.  Force yourself to not instantly look away. Establish your presence.

d. When you walk, walk with purpose. Consider walking 25% faster. [2]

e. Smile big and act as if you were confident.  Fake it till you make it.  

f.   Stand tall, and act like a person with pride.  People respond more positively to such a presence, which will up your confidence.

Take time to actively envision yourself successfully executing that thing which you fear.  Many times, our fears are tied up in our perception that we can’t or won’t be able to do something well.  A simple action that we can take to calm our nerves about a fear of our inability to do something is to imagine, over and over again, our doing that thing well, or perfectly.  Doing so will not only ensure you do that thing better, but you will have less angst leading up to the doing of that thing.

Take massive action to only allow positive thoughts in your mind.  Watching or reading the news, allowing ourselves to think negatively, being around gossipers, or participating in gossiping, will detract from your confidence, and thus incubate your fears.

Practice following what your conscience tells you is right.  In other words, listen to your gut.  By doing so, you will prevent a toxic guilt complex.  Trust your gut.  If something feels wrong, it probably is, so don’t do it.

Release your fear of other people, and of their judgements.  Remember that other people are just as human as you.  Also keep in mind, that people more often than not, really mean well.  And deep down inside, they are actually nice, and don’t have the negative judgements of us that we typically conjure up in our minds.

Be sure to review the ‘Take Action Diagram’ on the following pages, as it will help illuminate why taking action on your fears is helpful.

Once you have reviewed the diagram, consider coming back to the actions mentioned earlier, and pick any item, and decide to take action on it today.

TAKE ACTION DIAGRAM

We are fearful of those things that are outside our comfort zone. The unknown has always brought discomfort to even the greatest of us. This model objectively demonstrates how when we take actions/risks towards facing our fears, we eventually make progress towards overcoming those fears. [3]

Imagine yourself standing within the center of the model, which is your existing comfort zone.  As you take incremental risks, you move outward on this model, to higher level risks, acquiring new levels of confidence in the process.  This level of confidence then allows for you to keep moving (outward) towards that main fear, until you’ve faced it.  At this point, the discomfort of doing that fearful event again should be much less severe, as you have graduated into your newly attained comfort zone.

This model also demonstrates why even after we’ve accomplished a fear inducing goal, why we may continue to still have fears.  It’s important to note, that in most cases, the fear we are experiencing won’t be the same fear as before.  As we choose to stretch ourselves to accomplish bigger or more challenging goals, new fears will arise due to the uncertainty of accomplishing those goals. 

4. LEVERAGE THIS SELF-CONFIDENCE FORMULA

The following Self-Confidence Formula was derived from Napoleon Hill’s classic book, ‘Think and Grow Rich’ . [4]

We have found that it has the most optimal effect when it is read consistently, in its entirety, and aloud with deliberate energy every morning just after waking up. 

By reading this mantra daily as a ritual, noticeable changes to your confidence levels may be experienced.  As such, you will be positioning yourself to approach your fears with the heightened courage needed to conquer them.  Here it is:

1. I know that I have the ability to achieve the object of my Definite Purpose in life.  Therefore, I demand of myself persistent, continuous action towards its attainment, and I here and now promise to take such action.

2. I realize the dominating thoughts of my mind will eventually reproduce themselves in outward, physical action and gradually transform themselves into physical reality.  Therefore, I will concentrate my thoughts for 30 minutes daily upon the task of thinking of the person I intend to become, thereby creating in my mind a clear mental picture of that person.

3. I know through the principle of autosuggestion that any desire I persistently hold in my mind will eventually seek expression through some practical means of attaining the object.  Therefore, I will devote 10 minutes daily to demanding of myself the development of self-confidence.

4. I have clearly written down a description of my Definite Chief Aim in life.  I will never stop trying until I have developed sufficient self-confidence for its attainment.

5. I fully realize that no wealth or position can long endure unless built upon truth and justice.  Therefore, I will engage in no transaction that does not benefit all whom it affects.  I will succeed by attracting to myself the forces I wish to use, and the cooperation of other people.

I will induce others to serve me because of my willingness to serve others.  I will eliminate hatred, envy, jealousy, selfishness and cynicism by developing love for all humanity because I know that a negative attitude towards others can never bring me success.  I will cause others to believe in me, because I will believe in them, and in myself.  I will sign my name to this formula, commit it to memory and repeat it aloud once a day, with full faith that it will gradually influence my thoughts and actions so that I will become a self-reliant and successful person.

COMPANION RESOURCE: 

As part of this strategy, we’ve also included the following mantra, which was written by Walter D. Wintle . [5]  

This mantra is a great reminder of the power that thought has on our life outcomes.  We’ve included it because it is such a helpful reminder on the power belief and mindset can have on how we show up in life.

With constant review, it can strengthen your belief in your ability to will change, and to use your mind to defeat the challenges that lay before you.

MINDSET MANTRA

Related: Mantras For Success

5. BUILD CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF WITH AFFIRMATIONS

If you are not familiar with affirmations, they are essentially statements said to oneself, with conviction about a perceived truth.  They are a way of programming one’s mind into believing what you are telling it. 

Affirmations can be useful for strengthening our minds against a number of self-limiting beliefs.  They are especially affective for helping people manage a lack of confidence. And they are great to use if you have a strong sense of fear towards doing something.

If you want to learn more about what affirmations are, and how to make them work for you, we highly recommend you read the Psychology Today article, by Ronald Alexander Ph.D. titled: ‘5 Steps to Make Affirmations Work for You’.

The following phrases are some of the most powerful Fear Conquering affirmations you can use.  They are most impactful when read daily, out loud to yourself.  It is especially effective if you look into a mirror, directly into your eyes, when reciting these affirmations. This is known as the mirror technique, of course it’s not 100% necessary, especially if you are driving, etc.

For the sixth one, just fill in the blank with whichever issue you are having doubts about. Or fill it in with any issue that fills you with anxiety due to self-perceived feelings of inadequacies. 

For example; if you have doubts about your strength as a leader, recite the following: “I am a strong leader.” 

Similarly, if you fear you are not good public speaker, you can recite the following:  “I am a great public speaker.” 

And, if you fear you are not a good conversationalist, recite the following:  “I am a great conversationalist”. And so on and so forth.

You can also easily interchange the adjective of Great on this sixth affirmation with whichever you wish to be more of. For example, you can use good, powerful, successful, calm, peaceful, happy, etc. instead of Great.

• I AM FEARLESS.
• WHATEVER HAPPENS TO ME, I CAN HANDLE IT.
• I EXUDE CONFIDENCE.
• I AM POWERFUL, POSITIVE, AND ENERGETIC.
• I LOVE MYSELF, AS WELL AS OTHERS.
• I AM A GREAT__________________.

If you’re looking for a really thorough list of affirmations to build confidence in yourself, and more about affirmations in general, use these resources:

• Affirmations For Confidence
• What Are Affirmations?
• Do Affirmations Work?

With that said, this next section includes a helpful diagram that can help you track how affirmations are impacting your feelings of empowerment over time.  The exercise is optional, but it can help you observe and track progress.

PAIN TO EMPOWERMENT CONTINUUM DIAGRAM: 

This is a powerful diagram that the late Susan Jeffers, Ph.D. inspired via her book, ‘Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway’. [6]    It has served as a very useful way to track my progress on my feelings of confidence. 

With the knowledge that you can track how you feel about yourself, and how you perceive yourself in terms of handling your fears, you can gradually improve your situation.   That which gets measured, can improve. 

As such, this diagram is an excellent way to track your progress towards becoming more empowered via the affirmations you used, (or can be used to track your feelings of progress for the implementation of all mentioned strategies), towards building your confidence.  How you measure yourself is purely subjective and relative to your situation, but then again, so is fear.

An important thing to keep in mind, is that the secret to handling our lack of confidence, is our ability to move ourselves from a place of pain (see left side of diagram), to a place of feeling empowered (see right side of diagram).  When we are in a place of pain, we feel helpless, we feel depressed, have a feeling of paralysis (Can’t, Won’t, or Don’t want to do Anything), and are generally apathetic. 

However, when we are empowered, we feel we are capable of making decisions. We have more energy, we take more action, and we conduct ourselves from a place of passion.  Observe the diagram below.

When you’re feeling empowered, you’ll make better choices and have more energy. You’ll also take more action, and feel a stronger sense of passion and well being in your life.

PAIN TO EMPOWERMENT TRACKING

Consider tracking the impact the affirmations are having on you at the end of each week. Practice your affirmations diligently, and then measure how you feel in each area to if they are working.

Take inventory of your progress towards becoming a bit more confident and a lot more fearless for the next 66 days, using the ‘pain to empower’ diagram.  Simply add a check mark along the spectrum, pinpointing how you feel your empowerment levels rank on a scale from 1 – 8 at the end of every week  (1 being the worst, and nearest to pain, and 8 being the best and nearest to feelings of empowerment).   

Tracking like this can help to provide a sense of accomplishment. And that sense of accomplishment can help you push through the entire duration of the process.

Here is what that measurement and tracking process could look like:

Quantify Results to Make Measurable Progress:   Wherever you place your check mark on each of the four spectrums, you can use the location (1 -8) of that check mark as the number to enter in the boxes below.   By doing this, you put a number to your progress.  

In fact, at the end of each week, you can tally up your score for each spectrum (divide it by 4) and then enter it into the TOTAL SCORE box at the bottom.  By quantifying your improvement, you can make measurable progress over time.   For instance, the hypothetical total score on the next page is the total of each spectrum score, divided by 4.  i.e. 7+4+6+8 = 25   so then 25 ÷ 4 equals 6.25  

If you’re total score grows throughout the following weeks, keep doing what you’ve been doing, as a growing score signifies that you’re moving in the right direction.

Related: Affirmations For Success

6. INCREASE YOUR CONFIDENCE WITH VISUALIZATION

Cheryl Lossie, Ph.D., is a former lecturer of public speaking for Clemson University, and retired public-speaking lecturer who specialized in teaching some of the most fearless people on the planet, the U.S Special Forces, how to overcome their hesitancy of speaking in front of people, and how to do it well. 

When we interviewed Dr. Lossie about what she recommended to her students (the fearless Special Ops folks) for overcoming their fears of public speaking, she informed us that it was to simply practice visualization.

Her recommendation coincided well with much of our research and experiences for overcoming fears. In fact, it also aligned with some of Tony Robbins’ research on how to overcome fear as well.   As such, a great mental exercise to help you build confidence in yourself, is to simply practice visualization.

As a best practice to visualize effectively, it is recommended, that you sit in a quiet place, with no distractions. You’ll want to close your eyes, and then take 2 to 5 minutes to imagine yourself executing flawlessly (in addition rebounding flawlessly, if things do go as planned) that thing which you are so afraid of doing. 

For example:

• If afraid of public speaking, see yourself giving a flawless presentation.  Also, see yourself getting that standing ovation or that positive response you are seeking from your audience once you’ve finished wowing them.
• If it’s conducting an important staff-meeting, see yourself taking charge and crushing that meeting.  Imagine in detail exactly what you plan on saying, how you will say it, and think what you will say in response to other attendees at the meeting.
• If it’s presenting a sales presentation to a client, see yourself giving a perfect sales presentation.  Imagine also, every objection that might come your way, and see yourself handling those objections with grace and confidence.
• If it’s approaching that beautiful girl at the coffee shop, imagine yourself striking up a conversation confidently, and holding a great engaging conversation with the person.  Imagine everything that could go right.

You may be asking yourself, ‘Is building confidence really this easy?’ And the answer to that question is yes, it is that easy, so long as you put in the time to visualize your ideal outcomes.

With that said, let’s move on to our next confidence building strategy.

7. BUILD CONFIDENCE WITH ENCOURAGING QUOTES

Below you will find 20 power quotes that you can reference at your leisure.  Once you have read all of them, consider coming back to the ones that really speak to you.

The quote that moves you the most is the quote that will be most helpful to read when you need to take action on anything that you are resistant to do.

1. “Fear, the worst of all enemies, can be effectively cured by forced repetition of acts of courage.” – Napoleon Hill

2.  “Fearlessness isn’t a divine gift.  Fearlessness is a daily practice.” – Robin Sharma

3.   “There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” – Paulo Coelho

4.  “Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” – Les Brown

5.   “There is only one way to avoid criticism:  Do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” – Aristotle

6.   “A human becomes fearless by accepting his/her fears.  It is not a question of bravery.  It is simply seeing into the facts of life and realizing that these fears are natural.” – Osho

7.    “He who is not every day conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

8.   “Safe is Risky” – Seth Godin

9.    “Life is being on the wire, everything else is just waiting” – Karl Wallenda

10.    “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly ” – Robert F. Kennedy

11.    “Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far they can go.” – T.S. Eliot

12.    “Greatness lives on the edge of destruction” – Will Smith

13.  “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage” – Anais Nin

14.    “Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot: but make it hot by striking” – William B. Sprague

15.   “It is never too late to be what you might have been” – George Elliot

16.   “The most important thing to remember is this:  To be ready at any moment to give up what you are for what you might become. ” – D.E.B Dubois

17.    “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.  So throw off the bowlines.  Sail from the safe harbor.  Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore.  Dream.  Discover.” – Mark Twain

18.   “The only person who never makes mistakes is the person who never does anything” – Dennis Waitely

19.    “People who don’t take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year.  People who do take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year.” – Peter Drucker

20.   “It is only by risking our persons from one hour to another that we live at all” – William James

If you’re looking for additional quotes to boost your confidence and help you life life fearlessly, these collections will do the trick:

• 100 Best Quotes on Courage
• 70 Confidence-Boosting Quotes
• 35 Quote For Fearlessness
• 25 No Guts No Glory Quotes

8. BUILD CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF WITH THESE KEY QUESTIONS

The following four questions will bring new levels of clarity to every situation where a lack of confidence is involved.  It is suggested that you honestly ask these questions of yourself. 

Similarly, when faced with a future challenge or situation which induces anxiousness in you, ask yourselves these questions, and wait for your inside voice to answer the question for you.

After doing so, you should find that these questions have a calming effect on you, thus, gently banishing the fears that your mind has potentially built up around the task at hand. With that said, here are the questions:

Question 1:  What is really on the other side of this thing I am fearing at the moment?

The answer is always… NOTHING.

Question 2:  If I knew that I could handle anything that came my way, what would I possibly have to fear?

The answers is… NOTHING.

Question 3:  If the worst possible outcome related to doing this thing that is making me so afraid, actually happened, would I be able to handle the outcome?

The answer is…YES.

Question 4:  If I let this fear get the best of me, and allow it to keep me from doing that which  am afraid to accomplish, will I, on my deathbed, regret that I had not made the decision to do that thing which I so feared?

The answer is… IT IS UP TO YOU .

Related: Books For Confidence

9. DIGEST THESE CONFIDENCE-BUILDING TED TALK VIDEOS

To help you increase your confidence while simultaneously minimizing fear and its shrewd ability to limit our lives, we’ve curated four classic Ted Talks you should watch.  Our hope is that you’ll watch them and learn some new tactics that you can use to build your confidence and overcome your fears rapidly.

Here are the videos:

VIDEO 1:  AMY CUDDY

This is an extremely inspirational video by Social Psychologist Amy Cuddy.  She provides amazing insight into how research is starting to suggest that we are influenced by our own non-verbal communication to ourselves. 

In short, she reveals how our non-verbal’s (like body language) can influence how we think and feel about ourselves. Put another way, she demonstrates how you can manipulate your body to build confidence in yourself.

All in all, it’s full of great information to help you build confidence so you can become fearless.   Her last suggestion is what is most important.  “Fake it till you Become it”.  

VIDEO 2:  TIM FERRISS

Author of ‘Tools of Titans’ and productivity guru Tim Ferrids gives a nice intellectual breakdown on how he learned to deconstruct his fears so he can eventually conquer them.  If you watch the video till the end, he eventually ties all of his examples together to help you understand how you can overcome fear. 

His last two messages are by far the most important.  “Fear is your friend.” and “What is the worst that could happen?”

VIDEO 3:  JOE KOWAN

An entertaining and uplifting video that details how singer-songwriter  Joe Kowan eventually learned how to overcome his fear of being on stage.  Joe does this by ritually singing a stage fright song that he created before every event he does. 

It’s very powerful and it is a must watch for those who need to build confidence for getting on stage or in front of large groups of people.  Click on the image above to learn how to fearless and confident through learning.

VIDEO 4:  JIA JANG

Author of ‘Rejection Proof’, Jia Jiang, provides a very funny, informative, and helpful video for overcoming our fears.  He starts slow, but his message really picks up steam half way through.  By the end of the video, you will have laughed a dozen times and you will most certainly have gained some powerful insights for overcoming your fears and dealing with rejection. 

Jia Jiang’s last statement really knocks it out of the park, when he admonishes that we embrace our fears, because it is in doing so, that we are bound to discover our biggest opportunities.

10. FIND YOUR LIGHT

Why are we so afraid to do what we truly want in this life?  Why are we always letting other people’s opinions drive the decisions we make? 

Too many of us tuck our dreams and true interests away in some small corner at the first sign of disapproval from others. We don’t follow our own heart, we don’t we follow our light.  Why?

Robert Greene, said it so well in his book ‘Mastery’, as he pinpoints exactly what happens to so many people. In fact, it is what happens to all of us when we don’t follow our true inclinations.  He states the following:

“Conforming to social norms, you will listen more to others than to your own voice.  You may choose a career path based on what peers and parents tell you, or on what seems lucrative.  If you lose contact with your inner calling, you can have some success in life, but eventually your lack of true desire catches up with you.  Your work becomes mechanical.  You come to live for leisure and immediate pleasures.” [7]

So, if you are afraid to do what you truly want in this life, don’t be.  You only have one life to live, and none of us are getting out of here alive anyway.

If you are always letting other people’s opinions drive the decisions you make, or cause you to doubt yourself, with respect all due respect, stop!  Your opinions and interests matter, what interests you is important .

No more tucking your dreams and true interests away, no more hiding your talents because others may disapprove of them.  If you want to live a confident and fearless life, you have to follow your dreams .

This is the last act, because it requires the most self-examination and courage to act on your insights; however, it also harnesses the most potential to help you become confident, act boldly, and live fearlessly.  

Thus, to help you follow you fire, your light, your dreams, you first need to know exactly what it is that YOU want .  Thus, this strategy is an exercise to help you discover what your calling is, so you can follow it.

Once you’ve completed the self-discovery process, focus on bringing it to life by making plans to live it.

FIND YOUR CALLING EXERCISE

Below is a tool to help you find your light, your fire, or whatever you want to call it.

Ultimately, it is a questionnaire that will help you bring more clarity to your life. Improved clarity leads to confidence, and confidence leads to action, and action eventually turns into results.

Give it a look here: Find Your Light Guide

IMPLEMENTATION

By answering all of the questions in the guide provided, and giving each one your sincere and thorough consideration, you’ll discover a deeper awareness of who you are, what makes you happy, and what you should be doing with your life. All of these things will help you build confidence in yourself.

When every decision you make, every action you take is aligned with the fulfillment of the life objective you discover from this exercise, you will, without a doubt, have the confidence to truly live fearlessly.

BUILDING THE CONFIDENCE TO LIVE LIFE FEARLESSLY

A final word of caution. There is nothing more crushing in your pursuit of becoming your absolute best or in deciding to become who you truly want to be, then by having someone within your inner circle question your intentions and doubt your possibilities. 

“THERE IS NOTHING ENLIGHTENED ABOUT SHRINKING SO THAT OTHER PEOPLE WILL NOT FEEL INSECURE AROUND YOU.  WE ARE ALL MEANT TO SHINE.”    –  MARIANNE WILLIAMSON  –

As you’ve probably experienced, fear and doubt can spread swiftly like a virus.  As such, you must take proper precautions to make yourself immune to its infection. 

A good starting point, in making yourself immune, is to understand that doubters are simply afraid.  They are afraid of not living up to their potential, afraid that you may outshine them.  These individuals, will claw and scrape, and try to hurt you, to keep you fearful of life, fearful of your very best .

Often times, they don’t do this consciously. It’s their subconscious insecurities that compel them to lash out. And they lash out at you because they have yet to find the courage to face their fears and pursue their potential as you do.

If possible, remove these doubters from your life.  Remove, as best as you can, anyone who doubts your potential. Remove anyone who doubts your skills, your abilities, your choices, your greatness. 

If you can’t completely remove these people from your life, then distance yourself from them.  Spend as little time around them as possible, so as to minimize their negative influences on you. 

If distancing yourself from them is not an option, then you must create a mental firewall to negate their negativity, to negate their doubts.  A simple way to do this, is to convince yourself that their judgement no longer holds the weight that it once had.

Begin at once, to see yourself as a lion, and ‘them’ as the sheep (because that’s what they are). Reinforce your mental firewall with the following thought….

“A LION DOESN’T CONCERN HIMSELF WITH THE OPINIONS OF THE SHEEP.”    –  ANONYMOUS  –

A final word of encouragement. Congratulations, you now know how to be fearless and confident. You are truly equipped with the tools to become as confident as you want to be.  The choice to embrace your new found confidence and live life fearlessly is now solely up to you.

We encourage you to decide to be confident today, to make the decision to believe that you can handle whatever this world throws at you.  If you make this simple decision, and practice our recommended strategies, you will in effect be choosing to be fearless, and as a result, you will be. 

If the fears and doubts begin to creep back in, remember that you can rely on the power of belief and the power of pursuit, to drive your fears away.

As you move forward to build confidence in yourself, towards taking on new and greater challenges, we are sure everything in life will begin to change for you. 

Believe that you can do whatever it is that you wish to do.  Have faith in yourself, have faith in your vision, believe that you deserve the best, because my friend, you do. 

STRIVE To Go Fearless!

[1] Susan Jeffers Ph.D., Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway (New York: Ballantine Books, 2007), 22.

[2] David J. Schwartz Ph.D., The Magic of Thinking Big (New York: Prentice Hall, 1965), 52.

[3] Susan Jeffers, Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway (New York: Ballantine Books, 2007), 36.

[4] Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich (Connecticut: THE RALSTON SOCIETY, 1938), 57,58.

[5] Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich (Connecticut: THE RALSTON SOCIETY, 1938), 59, 60.

[6] Susan Jeffers Ph.D., Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway (New York: Ballantine Books, 2007), 26.

[7] Robert Greene, Mastery (New York: Penguin Group, 2012), 13,14.

COPYRIGHT © TheSTRIVE, 2023.  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

THE SELF-CONFIDENCE FORMULA

Self Confidence is everything.  In fact, if you don’t have it, your chances of finding serious success in any endeavor is going to be limited.

Now, we are not saying you can’t succeed without confidence.  But, we are saying that it will be difficult to gain massive success without it.  And massive success is the key word.

Don’t believe us? Try naming one extremely successful person who isn’t self-confident.

Exactly.  We couldn’t come up with a name either.

What is Confidence?

Now, confidence isn’t the same as charisma. Too many people get the two mixed up. Charisma is when someone has a compelling attractiveness about them, a charm if you will, that allows them to typically inspire devotion in others. However, confidence on the other hand, is the deep knowing that you can do something. It is a calmness of mind that stems from having trust in your ability to do a certain thing well.

Of course people succeed all the time without having the charisma of Winston Churchill, Neil Patrick Harris , or Matthew McConaughey, but succeeding without confidence is a completely different story.

“One of the key factors of legendary success is to learn how to generate your own self-confidence.” – Robin Sharma

Without Confidence You Won’t Do This….

Here’s why.  When you lack self-confidence, you essentially don’t believe in yourself.  And when you don’t believe in yourself, you won’t take action .

Needless to say, the less action you take, the less likely you’ll be to run into opportunity.  And without opportunity, you can’t really find success.

Why?  Because success is never something that is given.  Success is something that is always earned.

And success keeps her distance from those who don’t take action.

You can’t seize your moment, or take risks on those slivers of opportunity that rarely present themselves, if you are not taking action.

In short, we can’t succeed, we won’t succeed, without first having self-confidence.

If success requires anything…. above all else it requires action, and action requires self-confidence.

Related: Lacking Self Belief? Read This

Can You Teach Yourself Confidence?

The great news is, you can teach yourself how to be more confident. You can increase your confidence levels because confidence, much like a muscle, can be strengthened by use. And if you can teach yourself confidence, you can take more action. And if take more action, you can be become about as successful as you want to be.

More confidence will lead to more action, and more action will lead to more success.

Related: How to Become an Extrovert

The Key to More Action

With that being said, we want to give you a powerful tool that will help you become more confident.  We want to give you a key to taking more action , and from that action, the attainment of more success.  This key, is called the self-confidence formula.

This self confidence formula is a simple tool that various members of our team still use daily to gain and maintain the confidence needed to crush our days.

This tool has been a big part of our morning routine for years now, and it has helped us strengthen our belief in our ability to do…. well, just about anything!

This formula that we use stems from Napoleon Hill’s classic book, ‘Think and Grow Rich’.   If you haven’t read the book yet, then we highly recommend you read it [ Click Here to Download for Free ]. 

Of course, you don’t have to read the book before putting this effective confidence formula to work for you.

The formula is essentially a declaration that you read to yourself. It contains a handful of hidden affirmations (auto-suggestion) that will gradually work on your subconscious minds.

It is suggested that you read it aloud, with an open mind, and with faith that it can help fortify your confidence. It will require some faith on your part, but I can assure you, if you believe in it, it will work.

Related: Think and Grow Rich Quotes

So without further ado, below is your new highly effective confidence tool that you will be sure to benefit from. Here you go:

• I know that I have the ability to achieve the object of my Definite Purpose in life. Therefore, I demand of myself persistent, continuous action towards its attainment, and I here and now promise to take such action.
• I realize the dominating thoughts of my mind will eventually reproduce themselves in outward, physical action and gradually transform themselves into physical reality. Therefore, I will concentrate my thoughts for 30 minutes daily upon the task of thinking of the person I intend to become, thereby creating in my mind a clear mental picture of that person.
• I know through the principle of autosuggestion that any desire I persistently hold in my mind will eventually seek expression through some practical means of attaining the object. Therefore, I will devote 10 minutes daily to demanding of myself the development of self-confidence.
• I have clearly written down a description of my Definite Chief Aim in life. I will never stop trying until I have developed sufficient self-confidence for its attainment.
• I fully realize that no wealth or position can long endure unless built upon truth and justice. Therefore, I will engage in no transaction that does not benefit all whom it affects. I will succeed by attracting to myself the forces I wish to use, and the cooperation of other people. I will induce others to serve me because of my willingness to serve others.  I will eliminate hatred, envy, jealousy, selfishness and cynicism by developing love for all humanity because I know that a negative attitude towards others can never bring me success.  I will cause others to believe in me, because I will believe in them, and in myself.  I will sign my name to this formula, commit it to memory and repeat it aloud once a day, with full faith that it will gradually influence my thoughts and actions so that I will become a self-reliant and successful person.

Related: Self-Confidence Affirmations

Final Thoughts

There you have it!  A powerful and simple way to increase your confidence, and it’s free and available for you to use whenever you want.

Please don’t underestimate the power of this self-confidence formula.

Trust us when we say, it has the ability to level up your life.  We promise you. But, you’ll have to have a little faith and apply it habitually.

“What could we accomplish if we knew we could not fail?” – Elanor Roosevelt

To do so, consider reading this formula daily so that you make it habit to build your confidence .  The changes it will make in how you feel will amaze you. But ever more amazing, will be how other begin to notice the shift in your presence.

Moreover, you’ll impress yourself by how much more daring you’ll be in your own life.  Your new-found willingness to take more action, will undoubtedly open new doors for you.

It’s time to unleash that extremely confident titan residing deep down inside of you. Use this confidence formula to awaken that giant from its slumber! Your successful future-self, will thank you for it!

Till next time,

PS –  If you enjoyed this resource and found value in it, then you’ll enjoy this confidence booster and this list of great reads .

10 BEST WAYS TO STOP NEGATIVE SELF-TALK

When you woke up this morning, stumbled over to the mirror, and had a good long gander, what was the first thing you said to yourself? Did you give yourself a solid pep talk, remind yourself how awesome you are and think about all the ways you were going to crush it today? Probably not. You let that trash-talking peanut gallery in your head make you feel like you’re inadequate. Enough! If you’re going to take on the world and conquer it, you’ve got to know how to stop negative self-talk.

Negative self-talk is a symptom of something greater than just a lack of self-confidence. It can stem from years of not feeling support, an unending string of what we perceive to be failure, and an inability to see our potential. The roots of pervasive negativity can go all the way back to our childhood and manifest because we have unfinished business there, or it can be because we never developed a sense of resilience.

Overcoming negative self-talk isn’t merely an exercise in changing our mindset (although, that is a vital component for transformation), but a process which we have to be open to, so we can realize that on the other side of “I can’t” is an infinite world of “I absolutely can!”

You know that ol’ adage, “If we don’t respect ourselves, how can we expect anyone else to respect us?” The same goes for negative self-talk. We can’t lean on others to believe in us if we’re sitting in the back row doing an audit on our life instead of realizing that we are exceptional. So let’s dive in and learn some strategies to change our inner conversations and overcome negative self-talk for good.

HOW TO STOP NEGATIVE SELF-TALK

1. Call Your Critic By Name

Don’t roll your eyes, hear me out. You have been throwing shade at yourself for so long, you probably don’t even recognize when you’re being negative. That inner critic has latched onto you like a parasite and it’s time to set it free.

Give that critic a name, something funny. And every time you hear or catch yourself thinking something negative or critical, talk to your inner critic as if it were a person. Let it know it’s gunning for a break-up, and it’s just a matter of time.

If you feel comfortable enough, share the name of your inner critic with your friends and family so when they recognize you being negative, they can keep you accountable.

2. Talk it Out to Overcome Negative Self-Talk

Keeping with the theme of reaching out to friends and family, overcoming negative self-talk is a journey. It doesn’t happen overnight. And chances are, the ones closest to you (including your boss) have suffered alongside you. They are just as invested in your becoming a happier, more positive person as you are.

So when you feel yourself slipping into the doldrums, shoot a text to a trusted confidant and run those thoughts by them. If you’re mid-rant, telling yourself how useless you are, wouldn’t it be liberating to have someone chime in to tell you how smart, hardworking and kind you are?

Of course. It’s going to take a few battles to win the war, don’t be afraid to enlist the help of trusty troops.

3. If You Can’t Get Positive, Go Neutral

There is no pill for overcoming negative self-talk (though some may disagree). It takes work. Placing pressure on yourself to be all rainbows and sunshine right out of the gate only sets you up for failure, putting you in a headspace where negativity begets negativity.

Take baby steps. Start with very simple language changes. Swap out sentences like, “I can’t do this” or “this will never,” with phrases like, “I just need more time” and “maybe this can.”

This may seem trivial and ridiculous, but we’re talking about the power of language. Think about how destructive your language has been to you and your life. If you’re not ready to fully commit to complete transformation , let’s at least crack the door open, and explore some possibilities.

4. Stay in the Moment

Whew! This is a tough one, especially when one of your favourite things to do (subconsciously) is to focus on the absolute worst case scenario of everything in life. But unless you’ve discovered time travel, you have absolutely no idea what is going to happen.

Stop focusing on the “what if” and get your head in the game by being comfortable with the “right now.”

5. Get Off the Guilt Trip

Avid negative self-talkers love to pack their bags and head out on the most epic guilt trips. Guilt tripping lets you take inventory of every single minute thing that you didn’t get done, and then you get to revel in your failure to complete things. What about focusing on all the things you accomplished instead?

If you want to overcome negative self-talk, take 15 minutes out of your day every day and write down everything you accomplished. No detail is too small. From brushing your teeth, to closing a sale, to doing a load of laundry. You’re getting stuff done; you’re just too focused on what you feel like you should be doing.

6. Stop Pretending to Read Minds

Unless you’ve been side-gigging as a psychic, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on in someone else’s head. Read that again. If they haven’t told you, you have no idea what someone else is thinking.

So why are you creating negative dialogues about what they might be thinking about you? You need to stop attaching meaning to everything someone says to you, and stop fabricating stories that say bad things about you.

7. Surround Yourself With Positive People

Sure, opposites attract, but rarely do individuals who regularly engage in negative self-talk attract happy, positive people, and there’s good reason for that; happy people like to surround themselves with other happy people. If you exist in a circle of negativity outside of yourself, what hope do you have of making a transformation?

Make some social adjustments. If you’ve got family members who are enabling you or engage in negative self-talk, take a step back. Tell them you love them, but you need to make some changes for your mental well being.

8. Shift Your Perspective to Stop Negative Self-Talk

Pffft! Easier said than done, right? Sure, but totally worth a try. Take an inventory of your fears, your concerns, your challenges. Write them out, and read them back to yourself. Now write down why you think you’re incapable of overcoming these things.

Are they really so difficult? Are you asking yourself to climb Everest with no equipment next weekend? Are you being asked to solve world hunger by 2023? How dire are these issues you’re facing? You can absolutely push through whatever is holding you back from unleashing your potential. 

9. Simplify Your Social Media Influences

Don’t panic, I’m not telling you to get off social media…completely. What I am asking you to do is to take a deep dive on who and what you are letting influence your inner dialogue on the social media landscape.

Are you following positive people and brands? Do you spend hours and hours disappearing down social media rabbit holes, only to come up for air feeling even less adequate than when you swiped into the app? Clear the decks! If you’re not following accounts that make you feel like a rock star, or share positive narratives, you do not need them in your life right now.

10. Become Someone Else’s Hype Person

Helping others makes us feel good. It gets those endorphins pumping. But it also has a sneaky way of making us feel better about ourselves, and we tend to hold our chins a little higher. Consider taking on a mentorship role to someone in your life.

It could be a friend starting a business or a colleague who needs some support in getting that next promotion. Engaging in supportive dialogue with someone we care about can retrain our brains into quieting our own inner critics.

Final Thoughts on Negative Self-Talk

Negative self-talk is akin to cancer. It can permeate every aspect of our life, impacting our career aspirations, family and friend dynamics, and relationships. The great news is, it’s not a permanent state of being, it’s a choice.

Like everything in life, anything worth having requires time, effort and dedication, but once you cross that threshold into living a more positive existence , everything gets easier from there on out. So, if you’re ready to overcome negative self-talk for good, put these tips to good use daily.

PS – If you enjoyed this article on how to stop negative self-talk, then you’ll enjoy this read on how changing your mindset can can change your life, and you may even find value in these powerful affirmations for confidence .

100 INSPIRING COURAGE QUOTES TO HELP YOU FEEL COURAGEOUS

If you’re searching for some inspiring courage quotes then you’ll love this page. Before we dive into them however, know this…

We all need to look within and dig deep now and again, to remember that we have what it takes to live the life of our dreams. If that’s you, looking for that little nudge of encouragement, or help remembering that you can rise to the occasion, then you’ve come to the right place.

If you’re searching for quotes about courage, we’ve got them here. We’ve curated some of the most encouraging words on the importance of being brave, courageous, and fearless from some of the world’s greatest minds. Our hope is that they’ll give you the courage to unleash that inner bravery that will help you live your best life . So, without further ado, if you’re ready to dive into some of the most powerful courage quotes of all-time then let’s dive in: 

100 Courage Quotes to Help You Unleash Your Inner Lion

1. “Fortune favors the bold.” – Virgil

2. “Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” – Andre Gide

3. “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.” – Anais Nin

4. “Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be.” – George A. Sheehan”

5. “To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily. To not dare is to lose oneself.” – Soren Kierkegaard

6.  “Courage is being scared to death…and saddling up anyway.” – John Wayne

7. “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” – Winston Churchill

8. “He who is brave is free.” – Seneca

9. “Messenger boy: The Thessalonian you’re fighting, he’s the biggest man I’ve ever seen.  I wouldn’t want to fight him. Achilles:  That is why no one will remember your name.” – Troy

10. “Courage is fear holding on a minute longer” – George S. Patton

11. “ If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life.” – Marcus Garvey

12. “Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.” – Babe Ruth

13. “There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.” – Buddha

14. “He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.” – Muhammad Ali

15. “In any given moment, we have two options: To step forward into growth or to step back into safety.” – Abraham Maslow

16. “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” – E.E. Cummings

17. “Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.” – C.S. Lewis

18. “Courage is knowing what not to fear.” – Plato

19. “All our dreams can come true , if we have the courage to pursue them.” – Walt Disney

20. “The desire for safety stands against every great and noble enterprise.” – Tacitus

21. “It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.” – J.K. Rowling

22 . “Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace.” – Amelia Earhart

23. “Just as courage is the danger of life, so is fear its safeguard.” – Leonardo Da Vinci

24 . “The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.” – Coco Chanel

25. “Courage is a love affair with the unknown.” – Osho

26. “From caring comes courage.” – Lao Tzu

27. “He is a man of courage who does not run away, but remains at his post and fights against the enemy.” – Socrates

28. “Most of us have far more courage than we ever dreamed we possessed.” – Dale Carnegie

29. “You will never do anything in this world without courage.  It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.” – Aristotle

30.  “The secret to happiness is freedom…  And the secret to freedom is courage.” – Thucydides

31. “Courage is like love; it must have hope for nourishment.” – Napoleon Bonaparte

32. “Freedom is a system based on courage.” – Charles Peguy

33. “Courage is action, not talk.” – Jeff Rich

34. “Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius, and a lot of courage, to move in the opposite direction.” – Albert Einstein

35.  “Valor grows by daring; fear by holding back.” – Publilius Syrus

36. “If you could get up the courage to begin, you have the courage to succeed.” – David Viscott

37. “I have a lot of things to prove to myself. One is that I can live my life fearlessly.” – Oprah Winfrey

38. “Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.” – Seneca

39. “Courage conquers all things: it even gives strength to the body.” – Ovid

40. “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.” – Nelson Mandela

41.   “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.  If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it.  Go out and get busy.” – Dale Carnegie

42.  “Courage is on display every day, and only the courageous wring the most out of life.” – Zig Ziglar

43. “You can’t test courage cautiously.” – Annie Dillard

44. “Courage is doing what you are afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you are scared.” – Eddie Rickenbacker

45. “What you are afraid to do is a clear indication of the next thing you need to do.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

46. “People don’t follow titles, they follow courage.” – William Wells Brown

47. “Without courage, wisdom bears no fruit.” – Baltasar Gracian

48. “Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness.” – Bertrand Russell

49. “Trust the still, small voice that says, “ this might work and I’ll try it.” – Diane Mariechild

50. “The brave may not live forever, but the cautious don’t live at all.” – Ashley L

Halfway There

You’re more than halfway through these courage quotes, great job! We hope they are providing you with the inspiration and courage you’ll need to go after the life you want.

If you’re not 100% fired up yet, well, keep reading until you feel 100% belief in yourself. You got this, let’s go!

51. “The greatest test of courage on the earth is to bear defeat without losing heart.” – R.G. Ingersoll

52. “Creativity takes courage.” – Henri Matisse

53. “Fear is a reaction. Courage is a decision.” – Winston S. Churchill

54. “Do not be afraid I am with you.” – Isaiah 43:5

55.  “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

56. “Great people do things before they’re ready. They do things before they know they can do it.” – Amy Poehler

57. “Sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of courage and I promise you something great will come of it.” – We Bought A Zoo

58. “Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

59. “Courage is like a muscle. We strengthen it by use.” – Ruth Gordo

60. “One man with courage is a majority.” – Thomas Jefferson

61. “Life is too short to not be fearless for what you want .” – Nate Lee Morales

62. You can choose courage, or you can choose comfort, but you cannot choose both.” – Brene Brown

63. “Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quite voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.”

64. “Anything is possible if you’ve got enough nerve.” – J.K. Rowling

65.  “Courage is resistance to fear, master of fear, not absence of fear.” – Mark Twain

66. “The best way out is always through.” – Robert Frost

67. “I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflections.” – Thomas Paine

68. “Fight hard when you are down; die hard—determine at least to do—and you won’t die at all.” – James H. West

69. “Never forget that no military leader has ever become great without audacity.” – Karl Von Clausewitz

70. “The devil whispers, “You can’t withstand the storm.” The Warrior replied, “I am the storm.” – Unknown

71. “To uncover your true potential, you must first find your own limits and then you have to have the courage to blow past them.” – Picabo Street

72. “Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” – George Addair

73. “Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.” – Maggie Kuhn

74. “We must build dikes of courage to hold back the flood of fear.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

75. “Live Dangerously and you live right.” – Goethe

76. “Life is being on the wire, everything else is just waiting.” – Karl Wallenda

77. “Courage is Grace Under Pressure” – Ernest Hemingway

78. “Success doesn’t come to you, you go to it.” – T. Scott Mcleod

79. “Glory gives herself only to those who have always dreamed of her.” – Charles de Gaul

80. “Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” – Goethe

81. “Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” – Raymond Lindquist

82. “Sometimes you don’t realize your own strength until you come face to face with your greatest weakness.” – Susan Gale

83. “It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” – Theodore Roosevelt

84. “Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.” – Dale Carnegie

85. “Be Fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire.” – Courage Quote

86. “Never say never, because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion.” – Michael Jordan

87. “Courage is looking fear right in the eye and saying, “Get the hell out of my way, I’ve got things to do.” – Unknown

88. “Sometimes the biggest act of courage is a small one.” – Lauren Raffo

89. “Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” – Winston Churchill

90.   “Fate loves the fearless.” – James Russell Lowell

91. “One man scorned and covered with scars still strove with his last ounce of courage to reach the unreachable stars; and the world was better for this.” – Don Quixote

92. “Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live .” – Dorothy Thompson

93. “Have the courage to act instead of react.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

94. “He who has courage and faith will never perish in misery!” – Anne Frank

95. “The only person who never makes mistakes is the person who never does anything.” – Dennis Waitely

96 . “Cowards die many deaths before their deaths, the valiant never taste of death but once.” – William Shakespeare

97. “Courage is contagious. When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are often stiffened.” – Billy Graham

98. “Courage is the standing army of the soul, which keeps it from conquest, pillage, and slavery.” – Henry Van Dyke

99. “To be successful we must do things that unsuccessful people do not want to do. Those things require levels of courage.” – R. Harpe

100.  “Courage is the ladder on which all other virtues mount.” – Clare Booth Luce

Bonus Quote on Courage

We have one last addition to these courage quotes that we’d like to add.  It is a courage quote that every student of success must never forget.  Here it is, straight from the mouth of the  ‘Dean of Personal Development’…

“All You Need Is The Plan, The Roadmap, And The Courage To Press On To Your Destination.” – earl nightingale –

Final Words On Courage

There you have it friends, the best of the best when it comes to courage quotes.  Did you enjoy them?  If so, please share using any of the social share buttons below…  Spread the fire!  Also, if you enjoyed these courage quotes, you’ll probably really enjoy our popular No Guts, No Glory Quotes.

With that being said, we hope you’ll leverage these courageous thoughts and words of wisdom to start living the empowered and successful life you were meant to live.  

Till next time, 

PS – If you enjoyed these courage quotes, then you’ll likely enjoy this courage enhancing + confidence boosting resource: Go Fearless

50+ SELF-ESTEEM QUOTES TO INSPIRE YOU TO REACH FOR THE STARS

Having high self-esteem and confidence is critical to living a high quality life, and these quotes about self-esteem and confidence can help.  Without a strong sense of self and confidence in one’s abilities, life can be a struggle.  Low self-esteem can impact your professional success, your relationship success, and whether or not your reach for the stars and the best life has to offer. Consequently, having a low self-esteem and lacking confidence can greatly impact how your life turns out in general.

“Beauty Begins The Moment You Decide To Be Yourself.” – coco chanel –

So, considering how important having a high-self esteem is to living life to the fullest, we’ve pulled together these handful of quotes about self-esteem and confidence for you to use the next time you start doubting yourself and your self-worth.

Please use them to remind yourself that you are more capable and powerful then you know. Leverage them as encouragement to reach for the stars and unleash your potential into the world. So, without further ado, enjoy these top inspiring quotes about self-esteem and confidence :

BEST SELF-ESTEEM QUOTES FOR LOW-CONFIDENCE

1.   “Give what you have. To someone, it may be better than you dare to think.”  –  Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

2.   “As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.”  –  Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

3.   “The greatest discovery of my generation, is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitude of mind. ”  –  William James

4.  “Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.”  –  Maxwell Maltz

5.   “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”  –  Ralph Waldo Emerson

6.  “The only thing that’s keeping you from getting what you want is the story you keep telling yourself.”  –  Tony Robbins

7.  “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”  –  Buddha

8.   “To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.”  –  Denis Waitley

9.   “If you don’t love yourself, nobody will. Not only that, you won’t be good at loving anyone else. Loving starts with the self.”  –  Wayne Dyer

10.   “It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.”  –  Sir Edmund Hillary

11.  “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.”  –  Brené Brown

12.   “When you have confidence, you have a lot of fun.  And when you have fun, you can do amazing things.”  –  Joe Namath

13.   “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”  –  Ralph Waldo Emerson

14.   “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” – Dale Carnegie

15.   “Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”  –  Helen Keller

16.    “All confidence is acquired, developed.  No one is born with confidence.” – David J. Schwartz

17.   “Self-esteem is made up primarily of two things: feeling lovable and feeling capable.” – Jack Canfield

18.   “Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.”  –  T. Harv Eker

19.   “Confidence is a habit that can be developed by acting as if you already had the confidence you desire to have. ”  –  Brian Tracy

20.   “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.”  –  William James

21.   “Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”  –  Lucille Ball

22.   “Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.”  –  Norman Vincent Peale

23.   “Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.” – Kurt Cobain

24.   “The strongest single factor in prosperity consciousness is self-esteem: believing you can do it, believing you deserve it, believing you will get it.”  –  Jerry Gillies

25.   “The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone.”  –  Ayn Rand

26.   “Respect yourself and others will respect you.”  –  Confucius

27.   “Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment .”  –  Thomas Carlyle

28.   “Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.”  –  Judy Garland

29.   “You either walk inside your story and own it or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness.” – Brené Brown

30.   “Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth .”  – Anonymous

31.  “Confidence is not “they will like me”.  Confidence is “I’ll be fine if they don’t.”  –  Anonymous

32.   “Look well into thyself;  there is a source of strength which will always spring up if thou wilt always look.”  –  Marcus Aurelius 

33.   “In my mind, not just this year, always, I am always the best.  And I am always going to say that.”  –  Cristiano Ronaldo

34.   “If you are not in the process of becoming the person you want to be, you are automatically engaged in becoming the person you don’t want to be.”  –  Dale Carnegie

35. “Someone else’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality.” – Les Brown

36. “To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness.” – Robert Morley

37. “My self-esteem is high because I honor who I am.” – Louise Hay

38. “You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” – Louise Hay

39. “Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

40. “The only thing that matters in life, is your own opinion about yourself.” – Osho

41. “Only make decisions that support your self-image, self-esteem, and self-worth.” – Oprah Winfrey

42. “To love yourself right now, just as you are, is to give yourself heaven. Don’t wait until you die. If you wait, you die now. If you love, you live now.” – Alan Cohen

43. “One’s dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” – Michael J. Fox

44. “Accept yourself, love yourself, and keep moving forward.” – Roy Bennett

45. “Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye.” – Helen Keller

46. “Your chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself.” – Robert Collier

47. “The most delightful surprise in life is to suddenly recognize your own worth.” – Maxwell Maltz

48. “Watch your thoughts . Every thought accepted as true is sent by your brain to your solar plexus — your abdominal brain — and is brought into your world as a reality.” – Joseph Murphy

49. “I used to hate feeling embarrassed, but then I realized nobody’s watching and nobody gives a damn.” – Barbara Corcoran

50. “Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice.” – Steve Jobs

51. “The self-image is the key to human personality and human behavior. Change the self-image and you change the personality and the behavior.” – Maxwell Maltz

Bonus Quote on Self-Esteem

Bonus: Alright, here’s our last and final self-esteem quote. We believe it packs a punch, and can be used as a catalyst to dive into conquering your confidence challenges for good. Enjoy:

“No One Will Believe In You Until You Believe In You.” – ROBIN SHARMA –

One of our main goals here at The STRIVE is to help you believe that you have what it takes to be who you want to be, do what you want to do, so you can leverage that belief to strive to live the life you’ve always imagined for yourself.

And that’s where these self-esteem quotes come in, and what we love about them so much. Because quotes have the ability to uplift and inspire the reader.  And in the case of these quotes about self-esteem and confidence in particular, we hope they succeeded in encouraging you to believe in yourself . But most importantly, we hope these quotes help you realize deep down, that you do have a lot to offer this world, and that you have what it takes to shoot for the stars.

With that being said, we believe in you, but what matters most is that you believe in you , and that is a feat that is entirely up to you.

So, till you reach your aims,

PS – If you enjoyed these self-esteem quotes, then you’ll love these trust yourself quotes !

35+ FEARLESS QUOTES TO HELP YOU BE FEARLESS AND LIVE BOLDLY

Being fearless is not about never being afraid. It’s about feeling the fear, and diving in anyway. Fearlessness is oftentimes about being scared to death, but still saddling up to take on whatever beast or challenge that lies ahead of you. And because sometimes, filling our minds with a few strong quotes related to being fearless can embolden us to do what we must, we’re publishing these handful of fearless quotes for you.

So, if you’re seeking some inspiring words to help you be more fearless, then this page is for you. We’ve rounded up the most powerful fearless quotes to give you the courage to stand tall, take more risks, and never back down.

With that being said, if you’re ready for some encouraging words to help you become fearless, let’s dive in:

BEST FEARLESS QUOTES

1. “To avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.” – Elbert Hubbard

2. “The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.” – Moliere

3.  “I’m not afraid of dying, I’m afraid of not trying.” – Jay Z

4.  “The important thing is not being afraid to take a chance. Remember, the greatest failure is to not try. Once you find something you love to do, be the best at doing it.” – Debbi Fields

5. “When there is no peril in the fight there is no glory in the triumph.” – Pierre Cornielle

6. “If you never want to be criticized, for goodness’ sake don’t do anything new.” – Jeff Bezos

7. “Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there’s something inside you that’s greater than any obstacle.” –  C.D. Larson

8.  “One finds limits by pushing them.” – Herbert Simon

9.  “Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action.” – Benjamin Disraeli

10. “The arch enemy of mankind, is FEAR.” – Napoleon Hill

11. “There are risks and costs to action. But they are far less than the long range risks of comfortable inaction.” – JFK

12.   “Without dreams, there can be no courage. And without courage, there can be no action.” – Wim Wenders

13. “Go for it now. The future is promised to no one.” – Wayne Dyer

14. “There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” – Paulo Coelho

15. “Fear, much like resistance, is nothing but the human motive of aversion.” – The STRIVE

16. “Failure is an option here.  If things are not failing, you are not innovating enough.” – Cher

17. “The beautiful thing about fear is that when you run to it.. it runs away.” – Robin Sharma

18.  “Fear kills more dreams that failure ever will.” – Anonymous

19.  “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.” – Mary Anne Radmache

Related: Fearless Motivation Quotes

20.  “Your largest fear, carries you greatest growth.” – James Allen

21.  “If something is important enough, even if the odds are against you, you should still do it.” – Elon Musk

22.  “Don’t let the fear of what could happen make nothing happen.” – Anonymous

23.  “A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.” –  William G.T. Shedd

24.  “Cultivate a fearless approach to life, attack everything with boldness and energy.” – Robert Greene

25. “To escape fear, you have to go through it, not around it.” –  Richie Norton

26.  “Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.” –  Ralph Waldo Emerson

27. “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.” – Mark Twain

28. “Freedom lies in being bold.” – Robert Frost

29. “Before you can become a millionaire, you must learn to think like one. You must learn how to motivate yourself to counter fear with courage.” – Thomas J. Stanley

30. “Fate loves the fearless.” – James Russell Lowell

31. “The more you are motivated by love; The more fearless and free your action will be.” – Dalai Lama

32. “Once you become fearless, life becomes limitless.” – Anonymous

33. “Don’t be pushed around by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart.” – Roy T. Bennet

34. “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” – Woody Allen

35. “Limits, like fears, are often just an illusion.” – Michael Jordan

36. “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.” – Anais Nin

37.  “There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” – Paulo Coelho

38. “The most effective way to do it, is to do it.” – Amelia Earhart

39. “Fearlessness is the first requisite of spirituality. Cowards can never be moral.” – Mahatma Gandhi

40. “There is no illusion greater that fear.” – Lao Tzu

41. “Regret is the heritage of people who choose to live a fear-driven life.” – Taneka Rubin

42. “The eagle has no fear of adversity. We need to be like the eagle and have a fearless spirit of a conqueror!” – Joyce Meyer

43. “Being fearless isn’t being 100% not fearful, it’s being terrified but you jump anyway.” – Taylor Swift

44. “FEAR has two meanings: ‘Forget Everything And Run’ or ‘Face Everything And Rise.’ The choice is yours.” – Zig Ziglar

45. “We grow fearless by walking into our fears.” – Robin Sharma

46. “To many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” – Les Brown

47. “Let fear be a counselor and not a jailer.” – Tony Robbins

48. “Fears, even the most basic ones, can totally destroy your ambitions. Fear, if left unchecked, can destroy our lives. Fear is one of the many enemies lurking inside of us.” – Jim Rohn

49. “The key to success is to start before you’re ready.” – Marie Forleo

50. “Life begins where fear ends.” – Osho

51. “Courage above all things, is the first quality of a warrior.” – Karl von Clausewitz

52. “Fears are a kind of prison that confines you within a limited range of action. The less you fear, the more power you will have and the more fully you will live.” – 50 cent

53. “Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive – the risk to be alive and express what we really are.”  –  Don Miguel Ruiz

54 . “Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” – Jack Canfield

55. “Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers, but to be fearless in facing them.” – Rabindranath Tagor

Bonus Fearless Quote

Bonus: Alright, here is one last bonus quote that we think deserves special attention. We hope it inspires you as much as it inspires us. Here you go:

“Fear Doesn’t Go Away. The Warrior And The Artist Live By The Same Code Of Necessity, Which Dictates That The Battle Must Be Fought Anew Every Day.” – Steven Pressfield –

Final Thougths

There you have it friends, some of the best fearless quotes to help you conquer the timidity that would keep you from living your greatest life.

May these handful of fearless quotes serve you well, as you strive to reach your goals and unleash your potential

Till you reach your aims, Go Fearless , and…

If you’ve ever asked yourself, “How do I start believing in myself again?” then this article is for you. We know everyone falls into a rut sometimes where we don’t have as much belief in ourselves as we used to. We know everyone, from time to time experiences those days where our self-confidence somehow gets thrown out the door, leaving us feeling uncertain and unsure of ourselves. The good news is, we have a few great tips to help you find out how to start believing in yourself again.

There is no doubt that lacking self belief can leave you struggling to find your way through life with little hope for significant change. In short, not believing in yourself can make the future look bleak. Fortunately, you can find your way back to a more confident and assured you, if you try. And you can do it today!

So, what happens when you start believing in yourself? Well, you’ll start having more hope for starters. And with more hope, you’ll be more inclined to take action. And with every action you take to build yourself up, and create a better future for yourself, your confidence and belief in yourself will grow.

So, let’s get you started on this journey of reclaiming your self, and with it, your future. Just follow these seven steps. They’ll show you how you can start believing in yourself again, and help you feel like you’re on top of the world again.

7 Best Ways to Start Believing in Yourself Again

1. Practice Loving Yourself

Believe it or not, self-love leads to self belief. It’s extremely difficult to gain faith in yourself if you don’t love the person that you are on the inside. You have to find confidence in yourself. [1] This means loving the person you see in the mirror every single day for all of their good and bad qualities.

So, ignore any of those small pesky voices that try to put you down or say that you are less than you are. Keep your chin up, and never forget that you have a purpose and that your life matters.

But ultimately the, main thing to take away from this step, is to realize that you are unique, invaluable, and loved by others. And if others can love you, you can love you. That said, once you find a way to truly love yourself, you can then take the first step towards believing in yourself.

2. Realize All Personal Failure Is Not Your Fault

The affairs of the world has made many people feel as if they were lost in a tornado. People’s lives have been turned upside down both professionally and personally. Some people have lost their jobs, while others their house, family, etc…

Hardship and failure abounds, but in all reality, often times failure is not your fault. Some of the most prepared and successful people fail. [2]

So, figure out the difference between the times failure might have been your fault and the times when everything was out of your control. Do this, and you’ll slowly begin to see your worth. You’ll realize that you can move forward once you understand failure happens.

You may even come to the realization that failure can be a stepping stone to something greater. And that it can in fact be exactly what you need to get you to your next level in life.

3. Treat Yourself The Way You Treat Others

It is easier to start believing in yourself when you begin treating yourself the way you treat others. Think about it, you wouldn’t usually tell others they are worthless and a failure, right? No, of course you wouldn’t because you believe in those people you respect and love around you. You are patient with them. And you’re willing to lend a hand and help them up when life is tough.

So, do the same for yourself. Give yourself the opportunity to talk and be open just as you do those around you. The way you treat yourself is a direct link to your feelings. If you give yourself positive affirmations, you’ll feel happy and lifted up.

However, on the flipside, if you continually tell yourself that you’re worthless, you’ll feel sad and slightly depressed. So be sure you take care of yourself the way you would take care of your best friend. [3]

4. Feed Your Spirit

It’s important to feed your spirit and mind with positive things. Be careful what you watch on television and what you read each day. Feed your mind with interesting and positive topics.

Ask respected colleagues about the great things they’ve done in their life. Ask them how self belief lead them to become the person they are today.

Seek out inspiration in quotes and documentaries. Read about topics that will help you figure out your next steps in life. Read about facing your fears and being confident.

All of these things may seem small, but they will make a difference to your mind and spirit. And if you do them long enough and often enough, you’ll essentially be able to rewire your brain to be confident , which will in turn help you believe in yourself more.

5. Take A Step Forward

When life knocks you down, get up and don’t look back. It’s crucial that you practice self love by moving forward. You may feel like giving up or just staying down in the dirt.

But you don’t want to stay down too long, because you will eventually begin to doubt yourself if you stay down long enough. So pull yourself up by your bootstraps and move forward.

Don’t think about looking back because you may get stuck staring at the past. You’ll start to wonder about things you could have done differently. [4]

If you want to start believing in yourself again, you’ll have to live in the present and look towards the future. So, consider brainstorming the best possible outcomes in your life, and then start taking steps in the direction towards your desired outcome. And it doesn’t matter how small the step is either, just take one step one at a time.

If you to this, one day you’ll notice how far you’ve come, and those days will be a distant memory.

6. Know You Choose Your Reactions

Start believing in yourself by knowing you are in charge of your reality. You do this by deciding how you react to good or bad news. Now, we understand that you might not be able to change the things happening to you, but you can change the way you react to them.

Yes, you might be angry and confused when you lose your job or a loved one passes away. But there is nothing you can do to change those types of outcomes. The only thing you can do is control the way you handle the situation.

You determine the positive outcomes of negative things because of the way you react. Those lacking self belief get stuck in the negative outcomes. They don’t try to find a way out because they’re scared to face their own reality. It might be tough, but you can face anything with a positive mind .

7. Accept That You Are Not Perfect

It’s hard for many people to understand that they aren’t perfect. Social media makes it seem like so many people are leading these amazing lives. We think we must be positive and happy or we are worthless. This isn’t true.

Sometimes there are positive people that have tough lives. This is because they accept the pain. They know life is going to be tough at times. They know they endless optimism won’t make life easier, but it will help them handle the harder things and move forward. It’s okay to accept the pain and anguish in life.

The trick is to be honest about it. The trick is to forgive yourself for the pain in your life. Understand that sometimes you are going to be negative, and that’s okay. As long as it does not take over your self worth, you can feel the pain at times. Embrace the imperfect times then let them go.

Related: Believe In Yourself Quotes

Bonus Tip To Help You Start Believing In Yourself

This last tip is related to correcting the issue by taking back control of your mind with force. A lot of the times, we don’t believe in ourselves because of alot of negative self-talk that we have going on in our minds. But, that negative chatter can be silenced with affirmations, especially if they are affirmations for help you improve your confidence.

So, if you’ve tried all the steps above, and you still find yourself wondering “How do I start believing in myself?” then you absolutely should give affirmations a try. Use these confidence affirmations , they’re a good place to start.

Self belief is something that isn’t created overnight. You might work years on yourself to boost your confidence and self worth. Just know that you are unique and the effort put forth will be worth the fight.

Give yourself the love you deserve by taking it a day at a time. It’s time to be your own best friend. And you can start by taking the first step and give yourself a few compliments today. Without a doubt, if you do this one little thing, you’ll start feeling better and you’ll usher in a more self-trusting and positive chapter in your life.

PS – If you enjoyed this post on how to start believing in yourself, then you’ll love this article on dealing with self-doubt .

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Need More Confidence? Here Are 8 Bestselling Books to Get You There. Self-esteem can be hard to come by and even harder to maintain. Try these authors' words of wisdom.

By Hayden Field • Dec 21, 2021

Rate this statement on a scale of one (disagree strongly) to five (agree strongly): "I see myself as someone who has high self-esteem."

If five wasn't your go-to answer, you're not alone. In a study of more than 985,000 people in 48 nations, researchers found that, on average, men consistently report higher self-esteem than women in every single country. What's more, the confidence gap was wider in Westernized countries (United States, United Kingdom, Canada), while it was narrower in southeast nations, such as the Philippines, Malaysia, Indonesia and Thailand.

Confidence is famously elusive, but there's a bright side to that: People have spent countless hours on research and self-improvement books meant to help others move past self-esteem shortcomings. Here are eight to consider.

You Are a Badass (Jen Sincero)

What We Love: In the first paragraph of her book, Sincero writes, "What little I knew about the self-help/spiritual world I found to be unforgivably cheesy… At the same time, there was all this stuff about my life that I desperately wanted to change and, had I been able to bulldoze through my holier-than-thouism, I could have really used some help around here." If this hits home, give You Are A Badass -- written by a #1 New York Times bestselling author and success coach -- a try. In three parts, Sincero's book outlines "How You Got This Way," "How to Embrace Your Inner Badass," How to Tap Into the Motherlode" and, finally, "How to Get Over Your B.S. Already." In chapters with titles like "Love The One You Is" and "Your Brain Is Your Bitch," she dives into concepts like self-perception, spirituality, healthy views of money, meditation and purpose, all via accessible language and actionable how-tos.

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "Stop what you are doing and get this book… This was the last book I read in 2017. The timing of it was perfect, because it helped me to formulate my goals and resolutions for 2018. This book helped me come up with my theme for the year: Love yourself.' Another says, "Her writing style does not feel like a self-help book at all. It's like having real-talk with a self-loving, educated girlfriend.'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $9.59 on Amazon

The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are (Bren é Brown)

What We Love: There's a reason why a speech by Brené Brown ranks in the top five most popular TED Talks of all time. She's a research professor and bestselling author, and this book contains guidance for living "wholeheartedly" -- something Brown equates to living your life from a place of worthiness. Through the book's ten guideposts -- with titles like "Cultivating Authenticity: Letting Go of What People Think" and "Cultivating Creativity: "Letting Go of Comparison" -- Brown aims to teach readers to view themselves as "enough," to let go of productivity as self-worth and to move away from self-doubt and the need to feel constantly in control.

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "I initially avoided this book out of concern that it was one of many under-evidenced self-help titles. Changing my mind on reading this was undoubtedly one of the best decisions I have ever made, and I am a much better person for it… I think I can guarantee that something in this book will profoundly change you.' Another says, "The author talks a lot about how making a major change in your life isn't something you wake up and do one day, it's something you practice every single day. And most will struggle with it, but without the struggle, we lose out on so much. I will have far fewer regrets on my deathbed having read this book.'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $8.70 on Amazon

The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance -- What Women Should Know (Katty Kay and Claire Shipman)

What We Love: In this book, broadcast journalists Katty Kay (BBC and NBC News) and Claire Shipman (ABC's Good Morning America) draw practical advice from their own life experiences, as well as those of other prominent women in media, business and politics. They combine these ideas with research in genetics, behavior, cognition and gender to arrive at self-esteem advice for women of all ages. "The newest research shows that we can literally change our brains in ways that affect our thoughts and behavior at any age," the authors write. "A substantial part of the confidence code is… our choice. With diligent effort, we can all choose to expand our confidence. But we will get there only if we stop trying to be perfect and start being prepared to fail."

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "I was expecting a touchy-feely book about how girls should have more confidence and drop everything to pursue your dreams, but I was incredibly pleasantly surprised in how scientific this book is.' Another says, "This book mentioned so many things that I used to do myself... I could see how I'm stacking the deck against myself without even knowing it. I read it before a salary negotiation, and as a result, I upped my initial asking number (and they gave it to me)!'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $14.89 on Amazon

The Happiness Project: Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun (Gretchen Rubin)

What We Love: There's a reason why this book topped The New York Times' Best Sellers list -- and why its author, Gretchen Rubin, has had her works translated into more than 30 languages. Rubin's writing and analytics put her at the forefront of research on habits, human nature and happiness. The latter was sparked by a simple question she asked herself on a rainy afternoon on a city bus: "What do I want from life, anyway?" In this book, Rubin outlines her own resolutions for the year she spent working on her own "happiness project." She focused on a different area each month, like vitality and boosting energy for January -- this meant goals like an earlier bedtime, better exercise and simply acting more energetic. Rubin's angle here isn't telling readers to do something -- rather, it's to share her own experience in hopes of inspiring readers to think differently about their own happiness.

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "The quirkiness of this twelve-month plan for a focus on happiness distinguishes it from other self-help books. It allows for a plan that can be modified to fit any individual.' Another says, "A realistic, genuinely practical (but not easy), lifelong approach to making the constant adjustments we know we need to be our best selves.'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $9.00 on Amazon

The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field (Nathaniel Branden)

What We Love: This 1994 book is an oldie but goodie. In it, Nathaniel Branden -- a pioneer in the self-esteem movement -- answers four questions: What is self-esteem? Why is it important? What can we do to raise our levels of self-esteem? And what role do others play in influencing our self-esteem? He also addresses six self-esteem cornerstones in turn: the practices of living consciously, self-acceptance, self-responsibility, self-assertiveness, purposefulness and integrity. Branden outlines steps for success in each of these areas, and he cautions that the task of sustaining them falls on each individual. "No one -- not our parents, nor our friends, nor our lover, nor our psychotherapist, nor our support group -- can "give' us self-esteem," he writes . "If and when we fully grasp this, that is an act of "waking up.'"

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "As someone who is pretty self-aware but only just now dabbling into my deeper issues (self-esteem being my core struggle), I found this book to be supremely helpful. It offered me a ton of "Aha!' moments on how I relate to myself and others. It put into perspective that self-esteem isn't the prize at the end of treatment or work -- it's the actual work you do.' Another says, "I'm a psychotherapist, and I have gotten a lot out of this book personally and have recommended it to a lot of my clients.'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $10.57 on Amazon

Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be (Rachel Hollis)

What We Love: Rachel Hollis may have started out as a Hollywood party planner, but she switched gears when she founded The Chic Site, an online platform focused on helping women improve their lives in the form of small, actionable steps. Her book takes the same approach when it comes to diving into the mindsets that get in the way of self-esteem and how to turn them around. Hollis begins each chapter with a specific lie she once believed about herself, then analyzes it and provides tools for like-minded women to stop believing it. One chapter begins with the lie, "I'll start tomorrow," followed by the ways Hollis found the motivation to always keep promises she makes to herself.

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "I honestly believe this book can help every woman grow. Personally, it has helped me focus on the one person who is the last to get my attention and effort: myself… She writes as if she's your bestie giving advice and sometimes tough love over a VLC (vodka la croix).' Another says, "This book rocked my world. I feel as though I've been picked up, thrown upside down and shaken around with all of the thoughts running through my brain since I started reading.'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $13.79 on Amazon

Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun and Be Your Own Person (Shonda Rimes)

What We Love: Shonda Rimes may have had three shows on television, but she didn't have it all -- especially when it came to confidence. Six words from her sister at a 2013 Thanksgiving dinner changed her life: "You never say yes to anything." Rimes realized she consistently said no to public appearances, interviews and events for one simple reason: fear. Self-esteem, unhappiness with weight and social anxiety all prompted her to decline any invitation that scared her in the least. And although it terrified her, she decided to change that in the hopes that embracing new things would lead closer to happiness. In this book, Rimes chronicles the year she spent saying yes to every single thing that scared her -- and inspires readers to do the same.

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "She's funny. Like laughing out loud in public funny. Like people changing seats on the bus because you're smiling and snickering to yourself funny. Like spitting up coffee and pastry on the Kindle screen funny… In addition to being funny, she's pitch-perfect in her capacity to convey authenticity, vulnerability and confidence all within the same paragraph.' Another says, "I felt overwhelmed by my responsibilities: work, school, mom, wife, trying to be everything to everyone… By the end of the first chapter, I was ready to start saying yes to more things in life.'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $5.05 on Amazon

Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life (Gary John Bishop)

What We Love: If you're stuck in your head when it comes to self-confidence and you respond well to tough love, look no further than Gary John Bishop's book. "Here's what you've forgotten: You're a fu*king miracle of a being," he writes. The author also serves up a fresh wake-up call for those who believe they're not in control of all aspects of their life, transparently reminding the reader that other people and circumstances aren't what's standing in their way -- it's their own negative self-talk. In that vein, Bishop also provides strategies to boost self-esteem, as well as "assertions" for readers to repeat until they believe -- for example, "I am not my thoughts; I am what I do."

What Readers Say: One reviewer writes, "With the help of Gary's words, I realize that I am my hero and, ultimately, this is really good news for me. I was so busy waiting for things to get better that I wasn't in action about living a happy life… I feel like I am finally awake after an extended nap.' Another says, "One of the best books I've read. He doesn't just talk about changing your life but he lays out clear steps to make it happen. Must read!'

Best Place to Buy: Currently listed at $11.54 on Amazon

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33 Of The Best Books On Self-Confidence

Do you have that nagging feeling that you just don't measure up?

You don't feel as capable as you'd like in your job, in relationships, or in social settings. Or maybe there's something about your appearance that holds you back from feeling completely comfortable in your own skin.

A lack of self-confidence feels like a disability — as though you don't have all the tools you need to succeed in life.

In fact, research has shown that those who are self-confident earn more money and are more successful in all aspects of their lives.

It's good to know that low self-confidence doesn't have to remain a barrier to your success and happiness. You can develop a strong confidence in yourself and your abilities by changing some mindsets and behaviors.

You might not know exactly what mindsets and behaviors to change or how to go about changing them.

Fortunately, you have access to dozens of excellent confidence building books to guide you.

33 Of The Best Self-Confidence Books

1. the confidence code: the science and art of self-assurance—what women should know, by katty kay and claire shipman.

This self-help book on confidence helps women understand the importance of being confident and improving self-esteem , and teaches readers how to achieve it.

The authors make a compelling argument that men remain ahead of the game in the business world due to their higher confidence than women.

You learn how to prove your qualifications and self-worth and close the power gap in the professional world.

Readers love the relatable and inspiring advice given in this book, along with the friendly tone of authors who understand the struggle.

2. The Power of Self-Confidence: Become Unstoppable, Irresistible, and Unafraid in Every Area of Your Life, by Brian Tracy

Self-confidence is one of the main reasons that some people are more powerful and successful than others.

The amount of self-confidence you have determines the goals that you set for yourself, the amount of determination you have to achieve your goals, and your willingness to persist in the face of obstacles.

Brian Tracy teaches you how to develop a strong sense of self-confidence in every area of your life.

Related: 24 Of The Best Relationship Books Ever

Learning how to think like a top performer with this step-by-step guide allows you to build and maintain an unprecedented level of self-esteem.

Readers find this book to be a powerful tool to uncover what you want out of life and rediscover the powers you already have within you to achieve those things.

3. The Confidence Gap: A Guide to Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt, by Russ Harris

If you don't believe you have what it takes to overcome a challenge, there's a big chance that you won't attempt to take it on. This can lead to missing out on things in life such as relationships, jobs, and leadership opportunities.

Russ Harris teaches you how to build a new relationship with your fears by learning to accept and live with them rather than fight them.

Readers develop a new attitude towards themselves, acknowledging that people don't define their thoughts.

Once you can extricate yourself from your anxieties and regrets to be more mindful, you can live a life of confidence knowing you can achieve what you set your mind to.

4. Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It, by Kamal Ravikant

This powerful, quick read gets straight to the point as the author gives advice without adding unnecessary fluff.

If you battle with negative thoughts and struggle with mental health issues, reading this book can help you change your mindset.

The author provides useful advice to teach you to change the negative thought loop in your head to something positive.

Readers have found this book to be transformative in their journey to self-confidence.

5. The Ultimate Secrets of Total Self-Confidence, by Robert Anthony

Dr. Robert Anthony uncovers the secrets and lessons he has taught in seminars that have impacted the lives of executive businessmen, professional athletes, and more.

The lessons in this book teach you how having complete self-confidence can make you flourish.

You learn about effective communication, using your creativity to your advantage, effective methods for setting goals, and the benefits of being unique.

If you are searching to increase your self-confidence in all areas of your life, this might be the book for you.

6. The Self-Love Experiment: Fifteen Principles for Becoming More Kind, Compassionate, and Accepting of Yourself by Shannon Kaiser

Do you find that self-sabotage holds you back from facing your fears and reaching your goals?

If you are one of the many who believes they are not worthy of achieving their dreams, this is the right book for you.

Kaiser addresses self-love and the importance of accepting yourself first in this book, which she learned through her experience recovering from eating disorders, overcoming drug addictions, corporate burnout, and suffering from depression.

Learn to get rid of your thoughts that are based on fear and start to love your life with new daily habits and perspectives.

7. Confidence Hacks: 99 Small Actions to Massively Boost Your Confidence, by Barrie Davenport

Confidence is something that anyone can learn. The practical tips that Davenport offers in this book are accessible to anyone and can easily be implemented in your life.

Readers appreciate that the actions that the author teaches are small, but they add up to big changes that lead to a strong sense of self-confidence.

Learn how to visualize confidence, reframe rejections to be positive, and develop more confidence in social situations.

8. Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior, by Mark Goulston

Learn practical insights to overcome self-defeating behavior so you can achieve the love, success, and fulfillment that you want out of life.

Using stories and insights compiled from two decades of psychiatric clinical practice, Dr. Mark Goulstonteaches effective, actionable steps to transform your self-defeating behavior to life-enhancing actions.

9. Not Nice: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty… And Start Speaking Up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, And Unapologetically Being Yourself, by Aziz Gazipura

You may pride yourself on being nice, but how far is that getting you?

Often, one's niceness prevents them from speaking up and really going for what they want, Dr. Gazipura teaches readers how to stand up for what they believe, how to set firm boundaries, how to say no, and more actions that will help you get ahead, despite your nice tendencies.

If you are used to keeping your head down, learn to rise up and make your voice influential.

10. Get Smart!: How to Think and Act Like the Most Successful and Highest-Paid People in Every Field, by Brian Tracy

Do you want to learn how to get ahead using the methods that the most successful people today have used?

If you're like most people, you are not using 98% of your mental abilities and not even coming close to your full potential.

Related: 16 Confidence Building Activities To Improve Your Life

Author Brian Tracy teaches simple, yet powerful, ways to use your natural cognitive talents and abilities and make huge leaps toward success.

Learn to reach your potential by using your powerful mental resources to get results and reap the rewards that other successful people enjoy.

11. Self Confidence: Unleash Your Hidden Potential and Breakthrough Your Limitations of Confidence (Self Confidence Books, Self Esteem Workbook, Confidence), by Bill Andrews

Having self-confidence will help you reach your full potential and come out ahead in all of your endeavors.

Most importantly, self-confidence will make you feel terrific and leave any kind of situation with a sense of control.

Leave behind your life of stress, frustration, insecurity, and fear. Andrews teaches readers to build their confidence in order to achieve success in all areas of your life. Learn to gain control of your life and start making things happen.

12. The Art of Extraordinary Confidence: Your Ultimate Path To Love, Wealth, and Freedom, by Dr. Aziz Gazipura

This is a valuable book for anyone who is trying to achieve their dreams in life but doesn't think they are possible.

Learn how to get over anything that is blocking you from taking the necessary action and practical solutions that problems you may face.

Dr. Gazipura shows you how to take ownership of your life and responsibility for your actions in order to achieve your goals. Using humor and engaging stories, this book sets you up in the right direction for success.

13. Overcoming Shyness: Break Out of Your Shell and Express Your True Self, by Erik Myers

If you suffer from social anxiety, this practical guide helps you overcome this hurdle with new mindsets and lifestyle changes.

Readers learn to use their imagination to their benefit and learn about their true self.

This book is written in a conversational tone to deliver practical tips to help readers overcome real-life situations.

The author teaches readers to be outgoing and transform their thinking and actions to create a life of confidence.

14. How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships, by Leil Lowndes

Those who are skilled in the art of dealing with other people are successful and respected.

Leil Lowndes teaches 92 effective techniques to make an impactful first impression, master small talk, speak with confidence, work a room, and the art of feeding other people's egos.

Readers have found this book to be a valuable tool for communication and conversations.

15. How To Win Friends and Influence People, by Dale Carnegie

People find this to be a life-changing book and it has certainly stood the test of time.

Dale Carnegie believed that 15% of success stems from professional knowledge and 85% comes from one's ability to communicate their ideas, to take leadership roles, and to instill enthusiasm in others.

Carnegie uses techniques for treating people in a way that makes them feel appreciated, and he shares these skills with readers.

You learn to win people over through his anecdotes of historical figures, business leaders, and even everyday people.

16. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change, by Stephen Covey

This inspiring book teaches you lessons about the habits of some of the most successful people.

Dr. Covey makes these lessons easily applicable to anyone's personal and professional life.

The practical advice and challenges you read in this book help you shift your thinking and light the spark inside of you that continues to tell you that you can do better.

17. The Fine Art of Small Talk: How to Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills–and Leave a Positive Impression!, by Debra Fine

Do you have trouble making small talk?

Using the techniques and strategies that Debra Fine teaches in this book helps you step away from the outside of a room during social situations and feel comfortable in any type of social interaction.

Readers love how this book prepares people with any type of social anxiety to face the world with confidence.

18. The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism, by Olivia Fox Cabane

It turns out that researchers have found a way to control people's levels of charisma.

Olivia Fox Cabane draws from a variety of sciences to reveal unique knowledge about how charisma works.

She teaches readers how to have charisma through the use of stories, scientific facts, and practical tools.

19. The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over, by Jack Schafer

This might be the right book for you if you have trouble reading people and want to be able to quickly infer how others perceive you.

Former FBI behavior analyst, Jack Schafer, reveals his strategies on getting people to like you and turning strangers into instant friends.

Readers appreciate the lessons offered by Schafer on making a good first impression, building and maintaining relationships, and understanding the behavior of other people.

20. You Are a Badass®: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life, by Jen Sincero

You Are a Badass offers you the opportunity to take a look at your life through a fresh lens.

Sincero uses a frank tone to help you find your passion and live the life that you want to live, while providing you with laughs along the way.

Related: 57 Confidence Boosting Quotes

You are motivated to get rid of any lingering excuses that are holding you back in life and realize that you deserve a better and more satisfying life than what you have now.

21. Wire Your Brain for Confidence: The Science of Conquering Self-Doubt, by Louisa Jewell

Dramatic change is often a rare occurrence in people's lives, and when these defining moments do come up, it is common to doubt yourself.

This guide helps you to understand your brain and find ways to build confidence in order to face any challenges in life with a sense of command.

This book is written in a scientific, yet relatable, way and it offers exercises to practice as you go.

22. How to Be an Imperfectionist: The New Way to Self-Acceptance, Fearless Living, and Freedom from Perfectionism, by Stephen Guise

Perfectionism is a limiting mindset that prevents people from thinking outside of the box, doing experiments that might fail, and simply coloring outside of the lines.

Stephen Guise uses this book to apply behavior modification directly to the constant need for perfection, which results in a better method for change.

Imperfectionists don't have perfect lives — they’re just happier, healthier, and make more working progress on things that really matter.

23. Building Confidence: Get Motivated, Overcome Social Fear, Be Assertive, and Empower Your Life For Success, by Barrie Davenport

If you are trying to build your confidence, reading this skillfully written and empathic guide is a significant first step to success.

The research, unique perspectives, and action tasks that are included in this book quickly help readers overcome their obstacles to achieving a full level of confidence.

Readers appreciate Davenport's ability to be relatable and her willingness to simplify complicated thoughts and ideas.

24. The Self Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Overcoming Self-Doubt and Improving Self-Esteem, by Barbara Markway and Celia Ampel

Use the tools and strategies provided in this workbook to realize your best self and overcome self-doubt.

The real-life, evidence-based strategies described by the authors help you improve your self-esteem, relationships, work, and even your health.

Readers appreciate the interactive exercises and the clear five-step program that the authors detail in this workbook.

25. Do It Scared, by Scott Allan

Do It Scared challenges you to face the fears that are holding you back in life.

Scott Allan meets the reader in the trenches of real and often debilitating fears that everyone faces.

You learn the strategies that are needed to win the war against your fears and guidance in the pursuit of your dreams once they have been overcome.

26. Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, by Carol Dweck

How would your life change if you could break through your limiting thoughts and embrace any challenges that come your way as an opportunity for growth?

Dweck teaches her readers that by adopting a growth mindset, these things can be accomplished.

You learn how a simple adjustment in your mindset can uncover a love of learning and a sense of resilience that fosters accomplishment in all areas of your life.

27. Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, by Angela Duckworth

The concept presented in Grit is applicable to men, women, children, and adults.

You learn that the secret to success is not talent, rather it is effort — a combination of passion and persistence.

The key is to develop a true interest in your work so you are willing to put forth the effort to fix and learn from your mistakes and not lose sight of your long-term goal.

28. Confidence Creator, by Heather Monahan

Anyone can build the confidence that they need to attain their personal and professional goals.

Determine what is holding you back in your life with Monahan's techniques for becoming your best self.

Readers enjoy the honesty and realistic solutions that are provided in this book.

29. Daily Self-Discipline, by Martin Meadows

Improve your life by setting effective goals and applying the self-discipline that is needed to see these goals through to success.

Meadows teaches readers how to grow the willpower they need to control negative temptations and push through obstacles, no matter how uncomfortable they become.

She highlights the small, everyday changes that you can make for improvement, rather than one single life-changing event, which makes this book relatable to all people.

30. Girl, Wash Your Face, by Rachel Hollis

This highly-anticipated book debunks the lies that women tend to believe that make them feel unworthy.

Written with honesty and humor, Hollis shows readers how to live a passionate life full of confidence and the unrelenting will to carry on in the face of adversity.

Readers finish this book equipped with the tools that they need to reach their goals and live their best lives.

31. The Confidence Game: Why We Fall for It . . . Every Time, by Maria Konnikova

This collection of fascinating stories shows readers what all cons have in common and examines the relationship between conmen and their victims.

If you feel like your sense of truth has ever been able to be manipulated, Konnikova gives you some insight as to why this may have happened.

32. The Confidence Effect: Every Woman's Guide to the Attitude That Attracts Success, by Grace Killelea

The truth about the employment gap between men and women likely lies in the disparity in confidence that often exists between the two sexes.

This practical book is a must-read for women in the working world, as Killelea offers advice on how to increase your confidence and get ahead in your professional life.

33. Creative Confidence: Unleashing the Creative Potential Within Us All, by Tom Kelley

This entertaining narrative shows readers that everyone has the capacity to be creative, and this creativity allows people the ability to be innovative in their personal and professional lives.

This may be a good book for you if you feel like your creative skills are lacking or you feel like you are in a creative rut.

Final Thoughts

Self-confidence is something that everyone must build on their own, but using the tools that are laid out in these books can give you the guidance and support you need.

Don't accept low confidence as a life sentence. Take action by learning new skills to improve your happiness, success, and income.

Did you find any value from this list of the best confidence books? I hope you'll use confidence building books to create a more positive and inspirational for you?Would you like to help others?It would be really great if you could help me share these books on your preferred social media platform.

25 insightful self-help books that will help you grow in all aspects of your life

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• Self-help books aim to improve an aspect of our lives.
• They might be business books, psychology reads, or memoirs.
• We used Goodreads to rank the best self-help books to read in 2022.

Books can serve so many different purposes, from entertainment to education, but self-help books are designed to help us improve a specific aspect of our lives. Though the very idea of "self-help" books used to conjure mental images of cheesy lectures and impractical advice, the best self-help books actually offer a new perspective for readers to explore habit building, emotional growth, or gain a deeper understanding of the world. 

Goodreads is the largest platform in the world for readers to rate and review books, so we turned to Goodreads reviewers to rank the best self-help books to read in 2022. From classics like " How to Win Friends and Influence People " to Susan Cain's " Quiet ," these self-help books include business books, memoirs, philosophy reads, and so much more. 

25 of the best self-help books, according to Goodreads

"the subtle art of not giving a f*ck" by mark manson.

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $11.60

Mark Manson is a popular blogger who aimed to defy the norm of "positivity" in self-help books by acknowledging that, sometimes, life sucks! In his book, Manson encourages readers to recognize what is worth caring about and adjusting our perspectives based on our goals. 

"Atomic Habits" by James Clear

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $11.98

" Atomic Habits " is a practical self-help book that helps readers change bad habits and develop good ones. With an abundance of practical examples, any reader can develop a system of change with James Clear's suggestions and motivational writing.

"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $10.99

With over 700,000 ratings and averaging at 4.21 stars, " How to Win Friends and Influence People " is the best self-help book according to Goodreads members. Selling over 15 million copies since its original publication in 1936, Dale Carnegie's book includes his tried-and-true principles to help readers in their personal and professional lives. There are six principles to help people like you, 12 to help people understand your way of thinking, and nine to encourage change in others.

"The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen R. Covey

Available at Amazon , from $12.53

With over 15 million copies sold since its first publication in 1989, this self-help book uses 7 fundamental habits that guide readers toward an independent, successful, and fulfilling life. Using psychological principles, this book begs to be opened over and over again, refreshing readers with life mantras that will lead them to greatness.

"The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business" by Charles Duhigg

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $10.95

After studying patterns across a variety of success stories, Charles Duhigg presents why habits exist — and what we can do to change them. He argues the key to reaching any of our goals lies with understanding how habits are formed and uses researched principles to help readers change habits in order to transform their lives.

"The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up" by Marie Kondo

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $8.58

With a book and Netflix series that changed how we organize and stay tidy, Marie Kondo is a professional organizing consultant who presents the KonMari method of organizing. In " The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up ," Kondo introduces readers to her approach to cleaning, including the idea of only keeping items that "spark joy".

"You Are A Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life" by Jen Sincero

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $8.45

This best-selling self-help book uses anecdotes and exercises to help readers break down the mental barriers that are keeping them from achieving their goals. It's an inspirational, motivational, and funny read that aims to instill self-confidence and leave readers feeling refreshed and ready to accomplish anything.

"The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $7.74

In this spiritual self-help book, Don Miguel Ruiz pulls from Toltec wisdom to present four principles that, when applied in harmony with each other, can offer new experiences and happiness in our lives. This book challenges readers to apply four simple truths to their lives: Be impeccable with your word, don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best.

"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $7.51

" The Power of Now " is a spiritual self-help book that proclaims living in "the now" is the ultimate path to happiness. More a practical guide than a traditional narrative, Tolle aims to inspire readers to become conscious of the thoughts and challenges that prevent us from living in the present moment.

"Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" by Susan Cain

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $13.89

Introverts have been widely overlooked in American society. In this psychology book dubbed a favorite self-help read by Goodreads reviewers, Susan Cain uses stories from successful introverts to explain how invaluable introverts are to our community and help introverts value themselves more. To learn more about this book, check out our review of "Quiet."

"The Gifts of Imperfection" by Brené Brown

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $8.47

Brené Brown's 2010 self-help bestseller is still a favorite amongst Goodreads reviewers for the revelations and impacts her reflections have had on their lives. In this book, Brown explores the psychology behind releasing our expectations of living a "perfect" life and offers 10 benchmarks readers can follow to embrace a more authentic life.

"Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead" by Brené Brown

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $9.99

Based on 12 years of research, " Daring Greatly " is a self-help book that encourages readers to embrace vulnerability as a strength, not a weakness. With personal anecdotes and plenty of examples, this book demonstrates how vulnerability can open new avenues to courage, connection, and creativity.

"Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World" by Cal Newport

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $14.99

" Deep Work " is a self-help book about productivity that aims to help readers understand how to reach a "deep work" state where we can focus on a mentally demanding task without distraction — a skill that has become harder and harder to master in an increasingly distracted world. Cal Newport argues the importance of deep work and presents four rules readers can follow to transform their productivity habits and reach more focused success.

"The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $7.57

" The 5 Love Languages " is a self-help book whose concepts have permeated many relationships as its popularity grows. In this book, Dr. Gary Chapman proposes that there are five main ways in which people give and receive love. By understanding your and your partner's love language, you can enrich your relationship by showing love more effectively. 

"Who Moved My Cheese" by Dr. Spencer Johnson

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $10.17

First published in 1998, " Who Moved My Cheese ?" is a self-help book in the form of a motivational fable of four characters who live in a maze, looking for cheese. Representing anything we may want in life, the cheese is constantly moving and only when one character successfully navigates change to reach the cheese does the reader discover how to navigate change in their own lives.

"The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $11

Written after the hit movie of the same name in 2006, " The Secret " is a self-help book that outlines the law of attraction, a concept Rhonda Byrne claims can change or redirect a person's entire life. With this concept, Byrne encourages readers to find the power within themselves to apply "The Secret" to every aspect of life and achieve nearly anything.

"Thinking, Fast and Slow" by Daniel Kahneman

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $11.29

This psychology book has helped readers understand the way we think by separating our thought processes into two systems: one that is intuitive and one that is deliberate. By knowing how these two systems work separately and together, we can better understand how we make choices and think about thinking. To learn more about this book, check out our review of "Thinking, Fast and Slow."

Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert T. Kiyosaki

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $7.18

Though " Rich Dad, Poor Dad " is usually seen as a business or finance read , Goodreads reviewers love it as a self-help book as well for its lessons on how to make your money work for you. Author Robert T. Kiyosaki grew up with two dads — his own and his best friend's dad — who shaped his views on money and investing in very different ways. In this book, Kiyosaki explains different financial theories to change how many readers view finances.

"The Happiness Project: Or Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun" by Gretchen Rubin

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $11.19

When Gretchen Rubin realized she wasn't focusing on the things in her life that truly mattered, she decided to dedicate a year to her "happiness project." This autobiographical self-help book is a 12-month chronicle of her journey as she tried new things, focused on improving herself, and embraced happiness while encouraging others to take time and do the same. 

"Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear" by Elizabeth Gilbert

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $9.38

In a self-help book that aims to inspire creativity, Elizabeth Gilbert offers an honest look at the creative process — with all of its challenges and unrealistic expectations. This book reminds readers that creativity isn't linear or clean and we can be any degree of an artist, writer, or musician that satisfies our soul.

"Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor E. Frankl

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $11.99

" Man's Search for Meaning " is a memoir that begins with psychologist Viktor E. Frankl's experiences in Auschwitz during World War II and how he coped with suffering in order to not just survive it, but move forward with purpose. With psychological, philosophical, and sociological influences, this moving read offers self-help advice through the author's inspirational personal account of searching for a guiding meaning in life. It's also a book that therapists recommend to read if you want to build more empathy .

"The 4-Hour Workweek" by Timothy Ferriss

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $13.39

Aiming to help readers escape the confines of a 9-5 job, " The 4-Hour Workweek " encourages a restructuring of our lifestyle to find fulfillment now rather than once we retire. Born of the author's three-week break from his company, this self-help book is modeled after his series of lectures on entrepreneurship given at Princeton University.

"Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity" by David Allen

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $10.29

While many self-help productivity books encourage readers to work harder, " Getting Things Done " proposes that our productivity is directly linked to our ability to relax, as we can only reach our greatest potential when our minds are clear and organized. This book offers core principles, tricks, and advice to help readers streamline their effectiveness, overcome challenging situations, and avoid the burnout that often comes with an overwhelming workload. 

"Mindset: The New Psychology of Success" by Carol S. Dweck

Available at Amazon  and Bookshop , from $8.55

Dr. Carol Dweck is a psychologist who, after decades of research, has discovered just how powerful and affecting our mindset can be in every aspect of our lives. In this book, she demonstrates how we can influence our success by adopting a growth mindset — and how changing the mindset of a community or organization can inspire incredible success. 

"Outliers: The Story of Success" by Malcolm Gladwell

Available at Amazon and Bookshop , from $15.94

In this personal development read, Malcolm Gladwell highlights successful "outliers," the best and brightest of our society — from the Beatles to Bill Gates — and what makes them so successful. Gladwell presents the histories of our heroes, their rise to excellence, and how their beginnings carefully positioned them for success. 

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Last Updated: January 23, 2024

Top 13 Best Confidence Books Ever Written

Looking for a selection of the best confidence books ever written? Here are 13 of them!

Danny Newman

Trying to find the best confidence books out there? I hope this post helps!

Only 13% of Britons feel “very confident” about themselves and their personalities nowadays.

…What about you?

Are you a confident person? Or could your self-esteem , like mine, use a boost at times?

If your answer’s the latter, this post might help.

I’ve compiled a list of the best confidence books you can read to develop a more positive self-image.

There are books to build confidence in men and women, students and professionals, adults and kids, and everyone in between.

Read on for an ultimate list of books on building self-confidence.

Heads up, this post contains affiliate links.

Here we go, then: 13 of the best books on self-confidence I could find.

Interested in books to build confidence? You might also like these…

• 100 Makes Life Easier Ideas
• 10 Tips to Grow Through What You Go Through
• 100 Quotes on Believing in Yourself
• 10 Tips on How to Encourage Someone
• 150 Encouraging Words for Friends
• 100 Great Quotes About Missing Friends
• 10 0 Quotes About Smiling Through Pain
• 100 Unforgettable Quotes about Happy Vibes

1. The Gifts of Imperfection (Brené Brown)

Let’s face it: There’s a lot of pressure on all of us to look and act a certain way.

Many of us create unrealistic expectations for ourselves (or have them placed on us by others) when it comes to relationships, financial success, or other personal goals.

Brené Brown’s book is a breath of fresh air for anyone who struggles to become what they’re “supposed” to be.

As a seasoned professor, public speaker, and bestselling author, Brown offers unparalleled insight into what she calls “wholehearted” living.

Brown guides the reader through 10 guideposts with titles that include:

“Cultivating Creativity and Letting Go of Comparisons”

“Cultivating Authenticity and Letting Go of What Others Think.”

By learning to live from a place of worthiness, you can gradually learn that it’s okay not to be in control (or wildly productive) every second of the day.

2. The Self-Love Workbook (Shainna Ali, PhD.)

In America, 1 in 4 young adults admit they don’t like themselves “most or all of the time.”

If you’re in this demographic who struggles not only with confidence but also self-worth, add this book to your reading list.

As its name suggests, The Self-Love Workbook is more than a passive read.

Dr. Ali provides readers with actionable steps they can take to work through feelings of low self-esteem (or even self-hatred).

It’s full of not only thought-provoking advice but also interactive exercises and prompts for self-reflection.

Ultimately, this workbook aims to make you more aware of your own unique strengths and needs.

By the end, you’ll have a whole new (and much healthier) perspective of yourself.

The best self-confidence book for someone hoping to build their self-esteem could be this one from Nathaniel Branden…

3. The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem (Nathaniel Branden)

You’ll find this title on every list of the best confidence books, and it’s not hard to understand why.

It’s one of the premier texts that dives into research studies and clinical findings related to human behaviour.

Through its pages, Branden offers invaluable insight into cultivating healthy relationships and achieving personal happiness.

He also discusses psychological health (and how it relates to self-esteem and confidence) in a down-to-earth, easy-to-understand way.

Readers walk away with a deeper understanding of themselves, as well as the ability to recognise and value their own self-worth.

There are also sections dedicated to parents, teachers, and counsellors whose goal is to help others build self-esteem.

4. You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Live an Awesome Life (Jen Sincero)

If you find traditional self-help advice to be, well, a little cheesy, this could be the best self-confidence book on our list for you.

Sincero is a New York Times bestselling author and life coach who stays away from the cheesy prose and keeps it (very) real.

For example, you’ll find sections in the book entitled:

“How to Embrace Your Inner Badass”

“How to Get Over Your B.S. Already” and

“Your Brain Is Your Bitch.”

There’s also an eye-opening discussion that helps you understand how you became the person you are today.

Along the way, you’ll analyse your views on money, spirituality, self-image, purpose, and meditation, among other topics.

Sincero’s writing is easy to read with plenty of actionable how-to’s.

As one reader put it, “It’s like having ‘real’ talk with a self-loving, well-educated girlfriend.”

By all accounts, books on building self-confidence don’t get much better than this one from David Burns.

5. Ten Days to Self-Esteem (David D. Burns)

Looking for the best confidence books that yield fast results?

While your journey of self-development will never truly end, you can jumpstart the process with this insightful read by David Burns.

This book is ideal for anyone struggling with productivity on a day-to-day basis.

It’s also helpful for those who tend to be hard on themselves and what they’ve accomplished (or failed to accomplish) in their lives so far.

After helping the reader to acknowledge where they’re at, the book takes them on an inspiring journey of self-discovery.

The main pillars of the text are acceptance, compassion, and innovation, along with evidence-backed ways to use these tools to build a strong self-belief system.

6. The Confidence Gap: A Guide to Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt (Russ Harris)

Have you ever missed out on a major opportunity because you doubted your own abilities?

Would you like to make sure that never happens again?

If so, The Confidence Gap could be one of the best books to build confidence in yourself.

Harris tackles common scenarios ranging from public speaking and corporate leadership all the way to dating and personal relationships.

First, he helps readers understand and accept their own fears.

Then, using mindfulness techniques as well as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), he helps the reader come up with actionable solutions for things like shyness, doubts, and insecurities.

Looking for books on confidence about self-talk? Check out this one from Shad Helmstetter.

7. What to Say When You Talk to Yourself (Shad Helmstetter)

We all have an “inner voice” we use to speak to ourselves.

The tone of your inner voice depends on many factors, specifically the way you were raised (and the way your parents spoke to you).

If putdowns, nagging, and criticism were common in the environment where you grew up, you might unknowingly have adopted those habits when you talk to yourself.

If you often think things like, “I’m such an idiot,” or “I’ll never be able to do that,” add this book to your self-confidence reading list.

Dr. Helmstetter helps readers identify those deeply ingrained patterns of negative self-talk.

The goal is to help you be more aware of and disciplined in the way you think about yourself.

It also helps the reader to see how any thoughts (negative or positive) translate into actions and behaviours.

8. The Happiness Project (Gretchen Rubin)

Looking for a different slant on those build self-esteem books?

Rather than being told what to do, see what New York Times bestselling author Gretchen Ruben did to focus on personal happiness.

Follow Ruben through her year-long journey, where she focused on different goals for each month of her ‘happiness’ project.

For example, she set the goal of feeling more energetic in January, then took actionable steps like going to bed earlier and doing meaningful exercise.

Although this looks different from your traditional self-help book, it offers readers plenty of food for thought.

It allows each reader to pause, reflect, and create their own plan for happiness and self-improvement — with plenty of unique and interesting ideas along the way.

Next up, we have one of the best-known books to build confidence from the infamous motivational speaker, Tony Robbins…

9. Awaken the Giant Within: How to Take Immediate Control of Your Mental, Emotional, Physical and Financial Destiny! (Tony Robbins)

Could any discussion of confidence be complete without mentioning motivational speaker and self-help guru Tony Robbins?

If you’re struggling to “find” (or accept) yourself, get your hands on this tried and true classic.

Robbins believes that the key to a healthy self is learning to master our emotions — the good and the bad.

Through the pages of his book, readers learn to understand and accept themselves, where they’ve been, and where they’re going.

If you want to become more self-reliant and truly take control of your life, this book can help you get there.

Robbins outlines an easy-to-follow, step-by-step guide to help readers learn to love themselves and find real meaning in their lives.

10. Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life (Steven C. Hayes and Spencer Smith)

Do you struggle to let go of bad things that happened in the past?

Do you carry around the burdens of your younger self?

If this sounds like you, check out this inspiring workbook.

In the beginning, you’ll learn to differentiate between the unavoidable pains of being human and avoidable pain that comes from negative thoughts or a “lack of mental toughness.”

The book helps readers to learn and accept the fact that we can’t avoid all negative experiences.

In fact, we can use them to grow, become more mindful, and find the motivation to achieve our goals.

If you feel stuck in the past and unable to move forward, this is the title you’ve been looking for.

Still hunting for build self-esteem books? Here’s one on self-love you might like.

11. The Self-Love Experiment (Shannon Kaiser)

Are you the type of person who struggles to put yourself first?

If you’re trying to find the balance between self-care and your other responsibilities, try reading The Self-Love Experiment .

The great thing about this book is you can use the outline and advice to achieve any personal goal.

Whether it’s finding true love, landing a promotion at work, getting out of debt, or overcoming addiction, Kaiser gently helps readers uncover their strengths and value themselves.

The book gives readers a simple plan that focuses on relatability and compassion — specifically, towards yourself.

As you work through each section, you’ll gain a new perspective and take strides towards changing your attitude and habits.

12. Soul Without Shame: A Guide to Liberating Yourself from the Judge Within (Byron Brown)

This book is ideal for anyone who struggles to find something nice to say about themselves.

Brown guides readers on a journey of self-discovery that helps them to understand how and why they judge themselves so harshly.

In this book, you’ll learn the mechanisms behind this unhealthy habit, as well as why it’s so hard to change.

It helps you gain awareness of your inner “judge” that always seems to put you down.

Then comes the good part — actionable steps you can take to make your internal monologue positive, pleasant, and helpful.

There are also sections to help you recover and heal from years (or maybe even a lifetime) of low self-esteem.

Last but not least, we have a straight-talking confidence book from Gary John Bishop.

13. Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life (Gary John Bishop)

Are you the type who responds best to tough love?

If so, buy this book from Gary John Bishop that has served as a serious wake-up call for millions of readers.

As the title shows, the author isn’t afraid to tell it like it is!

The thing that’s standing in your path isn’t other people, your past mistakes, or less-than-ideal circumstances.

Rather, it’s negative self-talk that’s standing between the person you are now and the person you want to be.

If you’re ready to be the hero of your own life story, this book will give you the (figurative) kick you need to get there.

It will help you take control of your life and get out of the negative mindset so many of us find ourselves stuck in.

As one reader put it, “I feel like I am finally awake after an extended nap!”

Get Your Hands on the Best Confidence Books Today

Even the most confident person struggle with self-doubt sometimes.

No matter where you fall on the spectrum, these books to build confidence are sure to fill you with inspiration!

Remember, the best self-confidence book for you is the one that addresses your unique personality and needs.

Bookmark this list and refer back to it anytime you’re facing a crisis of confidence. You’re sure to find just the title you need to get back on track.

Now that you know the best confidence books, what’s next?

Stay right here and keep the motivation flowing with more advice to help you achieve your goals and ambitions.

These affirmations for reducing anxiety could be the perfect place to start.

The 12 Best Self-Improvement Books

It is the tried and tested, timeless models from which we have most to learn..

Posted December 30, 2021 | Reviewed by Abigail Fagan

• We have much to learn from ancient models of self-improvement that have survived the test of time.
• These texts contain timeless wisdom that remains relevant across the centuries and in different cultural contexts.
• Ancient wisdom traditions place more emphasis on virtues, humility, purpose, and altruism.

It is easy to dismiss self-help books and those who read them. But not only do we need serious self-help, we must also take self-help more seriously. Valued at $11 billion worldwide, self-help is a major global industry. It both reflects and generates many of our prevailing ideas about the self and about the cultures in which we live. The self-help industry not only seeks to shape the way in which we think, feel and behave, but also provides many of the core metaphors on which we rely to talk about our inner lives. Many of those metaphors, not least that of the mind as a computer that might require reprogramming, are at best unhelpful.

Critics of self-help believe that its current popularity is part of an all-pervasive neoliberal imperative to maximize efficiency. They see it as a sinister plot to direct all responsibility for our wellbeing back upon ourselves. Self-help, they feel, casts all our problems as personal, and our failures as owing to a lack of willpower and resilience , when they are in fact caused by the politics of capitalism. While this may be true of some self-help, the idea of self-improvement has a long and rich history, extending back to ancient wisdom traditions. The wish to improve ourselves is bound up with our need for self-knowledge, for mastery and for transformation. It is a timeless desire and an essential part of what makes us human.

And some self-improvement literature really can help us to become better people. I mean better not in a competitive but in an ethical sense: the improved self is more able to direct attention outwards, towards projects, other people, and the communities of which we are a part.

1. Marcus Aurelius, Meditations. The Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius (121–180 CE) believed that all suffering is in our minds. Suffering is caused not by external events but by our reactions to those events — by faulty judgments and unrealistic expectations. Given that most external events are beyond our control, Aurelius argues in his Meditations that it is pointless to worry about them. Our evaluations of these events, by contrast, are completely within our control. It follows that all our mental energies should be directed inwards, with a view to controlling our minds. The key to a happy life, then, lies in adjusting our expectations, because “Only a madman looks for figs in winter.”

2. David D. Burns, Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy (1980). The science underpinning David Burns’s Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy may no longer be cutting -edge, but its core message remains a powerfully relevant one. A more down-to-earth version of Stoicism, it is based on the premises of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Feeling Good illustrates how our feelings are shaped by our thoughts, and contains some great techniques for training our minds to question negative thinking about ourselves and others.

3. Russ Harris, The Happiness Trap (2007). We are, of course, not purely rational creatures. Sometimes our attempts to control our thoughts can become counterproductive. In The Happiness Trap , the Australian psychologist Russ Harris explains the principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). He invites us not to try to control our negative thoughts or uncomfortable feelings, but simply to de-fuse with them, to accept them, and then to let them go. That way we have more energy to commit to value-based action.

4. Lao-Tzu, Tao te Ching (ca. 4th century BCE). Spiritual self-cultivation through the art of letting go is the central theme of Lao-Tzu’s Tao te ching (The Classic of the Way and Virtue). In Daoism, letting go centers on the idea of offering no resistance to the natural order of things. It promotes a sophisticated form of submitting our will to cosmic forces, by accepting what is and loosening our attachments to our desires and expectations of specific outcomes. The Tao suggests that we can improve ourselves by returning to a simpler, more authentic and intuitive way of life. A key concept is wu wei – “non-action” or “effortless action.” Wu wei can perhaps best be described as a spiritual state marked by acceptance of what is and the absence of selfish desire. It is also a subtle but highly effective mode of soft power.

5. Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now: A Guide Book to Spiritual Enlightenment (1998). We are not our thoughts, argues Eckhart Tolle in his bestselling The Power of Now . Most of our thoughts, Tolle writes, revolve around the past or the future. Our past furnishes us with an identity , while the future holds “the promise of salvation.” Both are illusions because the present moment is all we ever really have. We therefore need to learn to be present as “watchers” of our minds, witnessing our thought patterns rather than identifying with them. That way, we can relearn to live truly in the now.

6. Matthieu Ricard, Altruism: The Science and Psychology of Kindness (2013). In many theologies and wisdom traditions, altruism is the highest moral and spiritual value. More recently, psychologists have shown that altruistic acts not only benefit the recipient but also lead those who perform them to be happier. Moreover, practicing altruism, the French Buddhist monk Matthieu Ricard argues, is the key not just to our personal happiness but also to solving our most pressing social, economic and environmental problems. Altruism enables us “to connect harmoniously the challenges of the economy in the short term, quality of life in the mean term, and our future environment in the long term.”

7. Henry David Thoreau, Walden (1854). The American transcendentalist philosopher Henry David Thoreau famously withdrew to a cabin in the woods near Walden Pond, in Concord, Massachusetts, where he sought to live simply and “deliberately.” It was there that he developed the intriguing notion of “life cost” — the perfect antidote to unthinking materialism and the toxic Protestant work ethic to which so many of us are still enslaved. Most of us find it normal to trade our life time against goods, believing that productivity and success are secular signs of grace. Thoreau saw paid work as a necessary evil to which we should dedicate as little time as possible. His aim was not to work a single minute more than was necessary to cover his most basic living expenses, and to spend all his remaining time doing what he truly cherished.

8. Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning: The Classic Tribute to Hope from the Holocaust (1946). According to the Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Victor Frankl, our most important task in life is to furnish it with meaning. Indeed, we must find meaning even in our suffering. In his deeply moving book, Frankl observes that those who managed to do this when they were interned in Nazi concentration camps had a much higher chance of survival. If there is a powerful “why” that drives us, he writes, we can tolerate almost any “how.” While meaning making can take many forms, including loving, creating and contributing to the well-being of others, Frankl insists on one limitation: meaning has to be situated in the world rather than in our own psyches. Our life’s purpose cannot just be the desire to become our best possible self, for the self is a very poor site for meaning.

9. Dante Alighieri, The Divine Comedy (1308–21). This fourteenth-century poem chronicles the gradual overcoming of the middle-aged and burned-out Dante’s spiritual weariness. Guided by his mentor Virgil, he journeys from Hell to Paradise, where he is eventually reunited with his beloved Beatrice. The epic can be read as a cautionary Christian tale or as an extended revenge fantasy in which many of Dante’s personal enemies get their gruesome comeuppance. But we can also read it as an archetypal story of spiritual growth and self-overcoming. The doubting Dante is systematically re-educated by his many encounters in Hell, Purgatory and Heaven. The inhabitants of Hell show him how not to live his life, and the costs of their bad choices. In the end, purged of his own weaknesses, Dante reaches a higher spiritual plane and glimpses the divine.

10. Anonymous, The Epic of Gilgamesh. Almost all forms of self-improvement resemble a quest narrative or a heroic journey. Such narratives entail the hero(ine) venturing into the unknown — a dark wood, an underground kingdom or the belly of a beast. There they encounter obstacles and often have to engage in battle with an enemy or a temptation. Having overcome these challenges, they return from their adventures transformed and ready to share with others what they have learned, the true function of the hero(ine) being to help others. The oldest surviving narrative of this kind recounts how the formerly selfish Mesopotamian king Gilgamesh returns from the wilderness into which he ventured, bearing the plant of eternal life. Rather than eating it himself, he shares his boon with his people.

11. Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936). Written during the Great Depression , How to Win Friends and Influence People is still in print for a reason, teeming with sensible and practical tips for making the best of human relations. Key to Carnegie’s method is the art of mentalizing — stepping into the shoes of others and trying to see the world from their point of view. Very few of us master this art, because it requires the ability to imagine what lies beyond our own cognitive maps. As Carnegie argues, however, this beyond is not exactly complex: Human beings are above all defined by their unquenchable thirst for attention, sympathy and respect. For others to like us, we simply have to find ways of giving them what they most need.

12. Angela Duckworth, Grit: Why Passion and Resilience are the Secrets to Success (2017). According to psychologist Angela Duckworth, grit tops talent every time. That is music to the ears of anyone inclined to identify with Aesop’s plodding tortoise rather than the effortlessly speedy hare. “Our potential is one thing. What we do with it is quite another,” Duckworth writes. Grit is a drive to improve both our skills and our performance by consistent effort. Gritty people are always eager to learn and are driven by an enduring passion. They learn from their mistakes, have direction, and live more coherent lives.

A slightly shorter version of this post appears in The Guardian .

I discuss these and many other texts in greater depth in The Art of Self-Improvement: Ten Timeless Truths .

Anna Katharina Schaffner, Ph.D. is a burnout and executive coach and the author of Exhausted: An A-Z for the Weary .

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The 7 Best Self-Help Books to Change Your Life

Find yourself in one of these versatile, mind-changing reads

Mary K. Tatum is a licensed mental health counselor and psychotherapist and has worked in the field of psychology for over 15 years, with seven years in the private practice setting.

Amy Morin, LCSW, is a psychotherapist and international bestselling author. Her books, including "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," have been translated into more than 40 languages. Her TEDx talk,  "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is one of the most viewed talks of all time.

Emily is a board-certified science editor who has worked with top digital publishing brands like Voices for Biodiversity, Study.com, GoodTherapy, Vox, and Verywell.

Until proven otherwise, it’s safe to assume that—as the saying goes—nobody’s perfect. That means we have room for at least some improvement in our lives . And no, we’re not talking about getting a higher-paying job or a new haircut: we’re referring to inner improvement . This involves working on managing some of our less-than-desirable habits and traits—things like being unable to trust other people, having difficulties with interpersonal communication, or lacking self-confidence. 

That’s where self-help books can come in handy. It’s basically like someone has thought extensively about the general challenge you’re facing, and then walks you through steps to help you figure it out—or at least think about it more clearly. To be clear: self-help books are not a replacement for working with mental health professionals. If you’re dealing with a mental illness, seek out a credentialed person you can speak with in person (or over a video call). But for situations without a clinical element, a self-help book can make a difference.

To help you narrow down your options, here are the best self-help books according to the experts.

"A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose" by Eckhart Tolle

Can be helpful to reivist certain passages, as needed

Discusses how to effectively process and find meaning in suffering

A lot of overlap with content found in the author's previous book

Many consider Eckhart Tolle one of the great thought leaders our time. Prior to " A New Earth ," Tolle wrote "The Power of Now," a best seller and must-read. The reason "A New Earth" makes this list is quite simple: it goes beyond teaching how to live in the moment and helps readers learn how to turn their suffering into peace. All types of suffering are addressed in the book, from anger and grief to jealousy and anxiety.

Tolle talks a lot about the ego and how to separate ourselves from it. His examples and recommended exercises are not just hocus pocus; they really work and are something anyone can do. Whether your suffering is rooted in jealousy, anger, grief, sadness, anxiety, or depression , Tolle will help you see life from varied perspectives, awakening you to your life’s purpose.

This book is great as a reference point, too. Those who pick up a copy will read it front to back then revisit Tolle's words over and over again. Others will keep it by their nightstands and flip to a chapter when they’re feeling some excess baggage creep in and could use some words of wisdom.

Price at time of publication: $18

"You Are a Badass" by Jen Sincero

Engaging exercises

Accessible writing style

Not the most empathetic towards people with depression

Contains some microaggressions and fat shaming

Far too often, fear gets the best of us. Jen Sincero helps readers go beyond that fear in her New York Times best seller " You Are a Badass ." What sets this self-help book apart from the others are the engaging end-of-chapter exercises.

Instead of casting the book aside and letting it collect dust after you read the last page, you'll be inspired to go back and reflect on the previous exercises you responded to. The exercises also drive home the points Sincero makes through her writing. When you feel a dip in your confidence, going back to your entries will put a positive spin on your day and remind you why you should show yourself more self-love . Also make sure to check out Sincero's follow-up book, "You Are a Badass at Making Money."

Price at time of publication: $8

Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD, psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry.

Some self-help books include daily therapeutic activities and provide comfort and guidance to individuals who are suffering. I recommend individuals meet with a psychiatrist and therapist, and concurrently utilize self-help books to expedite their healing.

"The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens" by Sean Covey

Text is broken up using cartoons and quotes

Could be beneficial for both teens and parents

Updated in 2014, but still can feel outdated

Unnecessary references to dieting and losing weight

Many have read, or at least have heard about, "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen Covey. Covey's son Sean followed in his footsteps, making a spinoff version for teenagers that uses the same principles to help young adults master formative areas of their lives.

To make this self-help book age-appropriate and downright fun to read, Covey breaks up the text with cartoons, quotes, brainstorming ideas, and stories from real teens to bring the book together. " The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens " covers   topics like  body image , friendships, relationships, goal-setting, peer pressure, bullying, internet safety, and so much more. Gift this book to your teenage son, daughter, niece, nephew, or grandchild. It's the perfect keepsake to pass down to future generations of teens too.

"What Are You Hungry For?" by Deepak Chopra

Helps readers understand their reasons for certain types of eating

More than simply a guide to healthy eating

Even though it’s not a traditional weight loss book, that component being included at all might turn some people off

Can feel like any other book on weight loss and our relationship with food

Deepak Chopra is the self-help guru of our time, and any one of his books could be recommended for various reasons. " What Are You Hungry For? " will help you see your relationship with food in an entirely new light.

While this self-help book could be considered a guide to help with weight loss, it’s really so much more. Chopra does talk about losing weight and also gives a pretty regimented recommendation on what to eat. But he also digs deeper into the reasoning behind our desire to seek this transformation, and fulfillment is at the center of this argument.

Since change isn’t easy for most, the book offers a lot of intention-setting tips to help readers determine the motives behind their goals. Attaching an emotion to the things you want in life, health-related or otherwise, makes it easier to stay the course when the going gets tough.

Price at time of publication: $16

"Declutter Your Mind" by S.J. Scott

Tackles negative thinking patterns—something a lot of people struggle with

Includes helpful, actionable exercises

May not feel as applicable to people who aren’t self-employed

Writing can feel self-promotional at times

The subtitle of this book provides great insight into the heart of the book: How to stop worrying, relieve anxiety and eliminate negative thinking. " Declutter Your Mind " is a book that is very hands-on with its reader and full of various exercises to engage your mindset. You will learn the causes of mental clutter, how to change negative thoughts to positive ones, strategies to help with rocky relationships, how to identify what’s important to you, the importance of meditation, how to goal set, and much more.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed with stress, worry, or anxiety, this powerful book will do its part in offering various techniques, tips, and tricks to cope with an overactive mind. Reviewers consistently note how much they enjoy the actionable exercises in the book and that the co-authors offer more than a sermon on the importance of living mindfully and in the moment.

Price at time of publication: $15

"Big Magic: Create Living Beyond Fear" by Elizabeth Gilbert

Great for creative people (or those who want to be more creative)

Accessible and conversational writing style makes it easy to read

Gilbert’s “tough love” approach doesn't always translate

Reads more as a memoir than a self-help book in parts

For one reason or another, some were turned off by Elizabeth Gilbert’s best-selling "Eat Pray Love". But don’t let that turn you away from reading her other material, in particular, " Big Magic ". If you’re an artist or creator of any type and have struggled with a blockage that prevents you from pursuing your calling to its fullest, you’ll want to give this a read.

From creating new habits (and ridding yourself of old ones) to overcoming fear and surrounding yourself with like-minded individuals, Gilbert hits the nail on the head as she dissects the obstacles a creative person may face in pursuing their dreams. Her honest, conversational, no-BS tone will light a fire in your soul and help you be upfront with yourself about what you want from life. A highlight of this book is the usage of real-life examples from regular men and women across the country who have endured in their creative feats.

Price at time of publication: $21

"The Wisdom of Sundays" by Oprah Winfrey

Full of what Oprah Winfrey considers “life-changing insights”

It’s like sitting in on a conversation between Oprah and major thought leaders

Print can be small and hard to read at times

Oprah is the queen of interviewing spiritual gurus, world leaders, therapists, doctors, and other thought leaders. " The Wisdom of Sundays " takes the best-of-the-best from these conversations and combines them into one uplifting read.

The book has 240 pages full of snippets from what Oprah refers to as "life-changing insights". Authors in The Wisdom of Sundays include   Shonda Rimes, Cheryl Strayed, Tony Robbins, Thich Nhat Hahn, Wayne Dyer, and so many more. Take your time with each individual page to make sure you don't skim over any of the wonderful and thought-provoking insights inside.

Price at time of publication: $28

Final Verdict

This one’s tricky, because a self-help book that one person hated could be the one that changed another person’s life. Having said that, if you’re new to the genre, you probably want to stick with a book with a broader appeal, like "Declutter Your Mind" ( view on Amazon ). While not everyone is looking to mold a highly effective teen, everyone does have something that makes them anxious, and this book provides a manageable way of identifying and addressing some of the ones that are holding you back. 

What to Look for in a Self-Help Book

Selecting a self-help book is, for the most part, a highly personal decision (with the exception  being cases when a book is so popular you feel the need to read it, even if you wouldn’t have done so on your own). Given that this genre is not one-size-fits-all—and that people respond to a wide range of styles, topics, and tones—finding the right self-help books for yourself can be a process of trial and error. But, to help guide you through that process, here are a few general things to look for when purchasing a self-help book:

Writing style and tone:

First, think about what kind of book that is likely to be the most helpful in your current situation, as well as the kind you’d actually like to read. These two categories don’t necessarily overlap. For example, you may think you want a clinical-sounding, research-backed guide through a particular condition or situation, but in reality, would find it so boring that you’d never pick it up. And a self-help book just sitting on the shelf isn’t helping anyone.

If you think you’d respond well to something funny, or that it would help hold your interest, look for a self-help book that injects humor into its pages. (And yes, highly qualified experts with fancy degrees can also be hilarious.)

Something your therapist recommends:

If you are working with some type of therapist or counselor , ask them for recommendations for self-help books. Not only are they probably very familiar with this genre, but they also have gotten to know you during your sessions, and may have a good idea of the type of book that you’d benefit from the most.

In addition to tone, self-help books also come in several different formats. “Some individuals fare better with more structure and guidance, while others excel with more creative and fluid feedback,” Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD , psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry explains. “Some people enjoy reading about concepts, while others prefer completing daily tasks and worksheets.”

Frequently Asked Questions

Like many things in life, what you get out of self-help books depends on the time and effort you put into not only reading them, but also doing the work. And no, that doesn’t necessarily include actual worksheets: the “work” also involves taking what you’ve read, sitting with it, processing it, and figuring out how you can use it in your own life (if applicable). 

“Self-help books can, in truth, be very helpful if an individual puts forth the effort to integrate the information learned from the book into their daily life,” Summer R. Thompson , DNP, PMHNP-BC, a mental health nurse practitioner at Community Psychiatry explains.

When someone finds the right self-help book and puts the time into reading it and doing the work, it can have a number of benefits. One is that they can “provide a concrete blueprint for an individual who has identified an issue in their life to navigate addressing it in a healthy manner on their own,” Thompson explains.   

In addition to providing a general blueprint for how a person can approach some of their biggest challenges, self-help books can add structure to individuals’ day-to-day life. “They can motivate individuals to try different strategies and venture into uncomfortable territory,” says Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD , psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry .

Beyond that, Magavi notes that self-help books can lead to more fluid and healthy communication at work and at home, and many allow individuals to remain introspective and practice self-compassion. “It helps individuals identify ways in which they can respond to inevitable stress in a more positive way, and reiterates the fact that they have the power to write their own story and determine their own emotional experience,” she explains.

What the Experts Say

“Self-help books have helped many men and women initiate the often-daunting task of processing their thoughts and assessing their insecurities and weaknesses. Self-help books allow individuals to try different techniques and find what works the best for them to assuage anxiety and confront tumultuous times with grace.” — Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD , psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry . 

“When looking at self-help books, it is important to look for books that provide clear and attainable goals in the context of the issue you are addressing. If a book makes recommendations that you do not feel are achievable in the context of your life, the book will likely not be very helpful to you and end up collecting dust rather than being an effective self-improvement tool.” — Summer R. Thompson , DNP, PMHNP-BC, mental health nurse practitioner at Community Psychiatry

Why Trust Verywell Mind?

Erinne Magee is a freelance writer covering health, wellness and lifestyle topics. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, and more.

Additional reporting by Elizabeth Yuko

As a seasoned health writer and editor with a special focus on mental health and well-being, Elizabeth Yuko understands how powerful stress-relieving activities can be for many people—as well as the fact that they’re not one-size-fits-all. With decades of first-hand experience dealing with anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder, she’s always on the lookout for new (and research-backed) products, techniques, and services that can help people cope with stress and other mental health challenges. 

By Mary K. Tatum, MS, LMHC Mary is a licensed mental health counselor and psychotherapist with 15 years of experience working in the psychology field. She earned a Bachelor of Science in psychology from Bluefield College and a Master of Science in Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University. She began in social work and then moved to drug rehab settings, working as a therapist, group facilitator, and clinical director. She specializes in family dynamic systems, trauma recovery, improving resilience, addiction recovery, and the psychology of successful business management.

20 Self-Love Books That Will Lift You Up

Words of wisdom for your soul.

Our editors handpick the products that we feature. We may earn commission from the links on this page.

The Self-Love Experiment by Shannon Kaiser

This book literally has "self-love" in the title, so you know it's good. By using her own experiences, Kaiser unveils key tactics that lead you to be comfortable with accepting and loving yourself first  in order to reach success.

You are a Badass by Jen Sincero

Much like its memorable title, this self-love book works to help you strengthen your confidence and fully embrace your best self.

The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

Through candid storytelling , Brown—one of Oprah's favorite authors —offers this revolutionary guide to improving self-esteem as she teaches that accepting imperfection leads to cultivating self-worth.

Radical Self-Love by Gala Darling

Gala Darling uses her own failures and shortcomings to help readers bounce back from rejection, depression, career setbacks, and heartbreak. Coupled with bright illustrations and homework exercises, it's a great reference to have nearby when you need a reminder of how special you really are. 

Badass Affirmations by Becca Anderson

Reciting daily affirmations can have a positive impact on your life., which is something Becca Anderson understands. Badass Affirmations is filled with wisdom and powerful sayings to encourage readers on their journey to self-discovery. 

Braving the Wilderness by Brené Brown

You may know Brené Brown from her popular  TED Talk   on vulnerability, her bestsellers  Rising Strong  and Daring Greatly,  and her appearances with Oprah on  SuperSoul Sunday . In her latest book, the social scientist unpacks the reasons we all truly just want to feel like we belong. 

The Self-Care Solution by Jennifer Ashton, M.D., M.S.

Written by  Dr. Jennifer Ashton , the chief medical correspondent for ABC News, this self-care guide offers realistic monthly challenges—think: doing cardio in May, upping your stretching game in November, drinking water in June (done!), taking more steps in July, and committing to laughter in December—to help you rejigger your life in a way that's actually doable. All of these experiments are led by Dr. Ashton, who talks the reader through her own experiences trying them herself, including the science-backed benefits and struggles she faced. So, it's like you've got a friend joining you as you try to reach achievable goals, while she cheers you along.

What a Time to Be Alone by Chidera Eggerue

Dubbing herself "The Slumflower," Eggerue uses charming candor, and even her own original artwork, to emphasize the fact that being alone can sometimes be the best thing you can do for yourself. Seriously.

The Wisdom of Sundays by Oprah Winfrey

Oprah highlights poignant and powerful insights from her SuperSoul Conversations with folks like Eckhart Tolle, Deepak Chopra, and Brene Brown to inspire you to find the beauty in your everyday life.

When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times by Pema Chödrön

Written in the aftermath of a devastating divorce, American Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön explores the ways in which the most difficult and painful moments in our lives can lead us to profound growth and transformation.

Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis

From the author of bestseller,  Girl, Wash Your Face , comes this equally inspiring call for all women to stop letting their ties to others define them and instead to follow their own dreams—and stop apologizing for it.

Becoming Wise: An Inquiry into the Mystery and Art of Living by Krista Tippett

Krista Tippett, a Peabody winner and host of the life's questions podcast On Being , continues to dig into what it all means in this New York Times best-selling self-love read. 

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

In Big Magic , beloved  Eat Pray Love  author Elizabeth Gilbert demystifies the alchemy of connecting and engaging with the creativity inside all of us. 

Pretty Happy by Kate Hudson

Even if you're not struggling with body image issues, Pretty Happy features a variety of life-affirming advice for anyone who needs to change their perspective. Actress-turned-author Kate Hudson gives tips on how to build confidence and be a happier you. 

Surprised by Joy by C.S. Lewis

In his memoir, Chronicles of Narnia author and prolific Christian scholar C.S. Lewis details his journey from a misanthropic youth to an unexpected return to faith later in his life—with great humor and wit.  

The Course of Love by Alain De Botton

In this novel, Alain de Botton—the philosopher who founded the global emotional intelligence organization  The School of Life —explores the oft-overlooked story of what happens after you fall in love through the lives of a modern couple in Edinburgh. 

Perfect Is Boring by Tyra Banks and Carolyn Landon

Mama knows best! The former supermodel and her mother, Carolyn Landon, take turns sharing lessons they've learned over the years, like the importance of embracing flaws and imperfections. The self-love book is an honest and often times hilarious dialogue between the mother and daughter. 

Into the Magic Shop by James R. Doty, MD

Part-memoir and part-science, Stanford neurosurgeon James R. Doty's manages to also be inspirational as he explores the relationship between the heart and mind. 

A Field Guide to Getting Lost by Rebecca Solnit

Writer, historian, and activist Rebecca Solnit takes readers on her own cultural journey in a collection of autobiographical essays.

Money Diaries by Lindsey Stanberry

Based on Refinery29's series of the same name , this personal finance guide not only offers insight into how other people spend, it also includes useful budgeting tips from financial advisers. This way y0u can ensure your finances are getting a little love, too. 

McKenzie Jean-Philippe is the editorial assistant at OprahMag.com covering pop culture, TV, movies, celebrity, and lifestyle. She loves a great Oprah viral moment and all things Netflix—but come summertime, Big Brother has her heart. On a day off you'll find her curled up with a new juicy romance novel.

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5 Books to Help You Build Confidence and Belief in Yourself

Confidence and belief in oneself .

Many of the wisest and most successful human beings in history have preached the importance of these qualities and many incredible books have been written to accompany that belief.

Over the years, I’ve read many great classics on the subject of building confidence , self-esteem, belief in oneself, whatever it is you’d like to call it. There are different terms for it, but it’s generally the same thing– developing the belief in oneself that you can accomplish what you set out to do, however small or large.

And, to that end, I’ve organized what I believe to be the best books on the subject to help you start developing more of this important trait.

Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy. – Norman Vincent Peale

Self-confidence, or belief in oneself, is important for virtually everything.

It helps us talk to that person, take that action, and stand our ground in the face of fear or ridicule. Self-belief ultimately plays a part in almost everything we do, so taking the time to cultivate more of it is a worthwhile endeavor.

And to help you do that, I’ve collected five such books that have made a big impact on me throughout my life. If you’re looking to build confidence and belief in yourself, these are all incredibly powerful reads that will help you do just that:

Image credit: Amazon

1. The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz

The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz was probably the first such book I ever read, and because no one had introduced me to the importance of self-confidence in my life up until then, it essentially served as an incredibly valuable introduction to the significance of it.

If you’re looking for a good introduction to the power of self-belief, this would be my first suggestion as Schwartz breaks down everything in very simple English.

You can get The Magic of Thinking Big here.

2. Think & Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

Think & Grow Rich is a book which is close to my heart. To me, it’s significance has nothing to do with money and entirely to do with the knowledge of how to accomplish anything, specifically that which you have a passion and a burning desire to accomplish .

To be fair, author Napoleon Hill never intended the book to only be about generating monetary wealth, in the book he specifically states that there is much more to wealth than money, a definition which I think has been mostly lost not because of the author’s fault, but because of our own obsession with money.

But how does Think & Grow Rich help you build confidence ? If you’ve read it, you’ll know how. If you haven’t, it’s hard to explain.

In the book, Hill explains something which he never names, but rather alludes to throughout the book so that you can discover it for yourself (as there is power in this method of self-discovery and no value in him simply naming it for you). It’s all about having a burning desire to do something, what are the factors which point to creating that burning desire, and how an unstoppable resolve allows us to make anything happen (even things we believe aren’t possible).

You can get Think & Grow Rich here.

Image credit: Goodreads

3. Daring Greatly by Brené Brown

It would almost be a crime to talk about books that help build confidence and self-belief and not include at least one book from researcher and now famous author Brené Brown.

Originally “discovered” by most of the world via her 2010 TED talk on vulnerability and self-worth, Brown has gone on to pen several bestsellers on similar subjects. What is so significant about Brown’s work, and this specific book Daring Greatly is how she uses her extensive research to back up her claims.

She doesn’t just say that allowing ourselves to open up, be ourselves, and daring to be vulnerable is the path to living a better life and leaving it at that. No, she documents an impressive quantity, and quality, of research that is hard to refute.

What I love about Daring Greatly (and, really, any of Brown’s books) is that she isn’t talking about the basics of developing self-belief, she’s getting to the heart of the very challenges we face. Many books on self-confidence and belief are valuable but they suffer from the problem of: what the hell do you do when it comes time to actually apply this to my messy and imperfect life? Brown doesn’t just tell you to stand up and face it, and that this is the path to overcoming it and finding courage and confidence in yourself , she proves it to you.

You can get Daring Greatly here.

4. Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins

Awaken the Giant Within is Tony Robbins’ second book and it’s a relatively gargantuan effort. The book covers strategies for improving virtually every area of your life, but more than anything, it teaches you how to find the confidence to take control of your life and make change a reality.

In this way, the book is less about directly teaching some technique for building confidence and more about teaching you an effective path for building your own confidence, something you can take with you for the rest of your life.

If you’re not just looking to build confidence, but also need to find some direction in life, this is very likely the perfect book for you.

You can get Awaken the Giant Within here.

5. The Power of Positive Thinking by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

The Power of Positive Thinking is a classic as far as self-improvement-related books are concerned, having been published in 1952 by Dr. Peale. Now a national bestseller, the book was one of a few early classics that helped shape the modern self-improvement space as a whole. You’re probably already aware of some of the principles spoken of in the book because of its far-reaching influence on modern self-help books.

So, who should read The Power of Positive Thinking ? Just about everyone. Ultimately, the book is about developing belief in yourself and your efforts, but it covers everything from realizing your goals to developing more positive mental habits, improving your relationships, and self-care . For its time, it’s a relative pioneer and a book you can’t go wrong with.

You can get The Power of Positive Thinking here.

These are all great titles that can help you build confidence and start cultivating self-belief. My advice? Go with the one that calls to you the most. We all have different personalities and quirks and I purposely picked various titles that would appeal to several different personalities.

Whichever you go with, if you truly desire more confidence and want to start developing greater belief in yourself, then take this seriously. Don’t let another day go by before taking the first step. Buy the book, set a time and day when you will (if not now), or at least decide which book it will be first.

Whatever you do, take action now by prioritizing the learning and absorbing of new knowledge. Each of these books is filled with wisdom that can transform your life , so take it seriously and see where it takes you.

• self-development

Matt Valentine is a father, husband, and a self-published author. He writes weekly on his blog, Buddhaimonia.com , about everything from spirituality to self-mastery.

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CPHQ Study Guide and Exam Mastery 2024-2025: A Confidence-Boosting Step-by-Step Guide with 350 Practice Tests to Horn Your Preparedness. Paperback – March 16, 2024

• Print length 172 pages
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• Publication date March 16, 2024
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Anne Lamott reflects on life, death, and 'learning to endure the beams of love'

Manoush Zomorodi

Rachel Faulkner White

Sanaz Meshkinpour

Anne Lamott has always been honest about the messiest parts of her life, from addiction to parenthood. Now, in her 20th book, she reflects on the beautiful—and complicated—realities of love.

About Anne Lamott

Anne Lamott photographed by her son Sam Lamott hide caption

Anne Lamott is the author of twenty books, including the bestsellers Bird by Bird and Operating Instructions . Her most recent book is Somehow: Thoughts on Love . Lamott is a recipient of the Guggenheim Fellowship and an inductee to the California Hall of Fame. She lives in Northern California with her family. She is also a Sunday School teacher.

This episode of the TED Radio Hour was produced by Rachel Faulkner White and edited by Sanaz Meshkinpour. You can follow us on Facebook @ TEDRadioHour and email us at [email protected].

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April 6, 2024

New Books Help Parents Explain Climate Disasters to Kids

Books are becoming a key part of disaster recovery, helping toddlers—and their parents—cope with increasing hurricanes, earthquakes and wildfires

By Ariel Wittenberg & E&E News

A recovery vehicle drives past burned structures and cars two months after a devastating wildfire Oct. 9, 2023, in Lahaina, Hawaii.

Tama/Getty Images

CLIMATEWIRE | Watching the Maui wildfires break out on the local news last August, Elizabeth Hartline realized there was something she could do to help: write.

The preschool director had for years written "social stories," explaining in simple terms the changes a toddler might go through in early life — from going to school for the first time to learning to use the potty. The same type of story, she thought, could help when disaster strikes.

“I just thought, this is what I can contribute, this is what I can do to help people process the trauma of what has happened,” said Hartline, who is director of Honolulu Community College’s Alani Children’s Center.

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Hartline's story, " There Was A Fire ," is now posted on the Hawaii Department of Health's website for easy access by wildfire victims. It's not the only story deployed in the wake of a disaster: The United Way, government agencies and other organizations have distributed tens of thousands of books to children after hurricanes, earthquakes, wildfires and extreme weather.

Childhood trauma experts say that telling stories about climate-fueled disasters can help small children cope with their experiences. Such books can become an important tool in strengthening the emotional and mental resilience of toddlers — and their parents — during disaster recovery, a time where formal mental health care might be inaccessible.

“There are times in disasters where we want to shield kids from the worst moments of the event, but sometimes they went through it,” said Melissa Brymer, director of terrorism and disaster programs at UCLA’s National Center for Child Traumatic Stress, who has worked on other disaster stories for kids. “And these stories help kids process it and give parents the language to talk about it even with very young children.”

Hartline’s story explains that winds are usually safe for people, as are wildfires because firefighters can contain them. But this time, Hartline wrote, "the big winds combined with the big fire” in Maui to make it spread faster than firefighters could put it out. The book also says that some people lost their homes, or jumped in the ocean to escape the fire and died.

The narrative is coupled with prompts for children to draw what they have seen or how they are feeling, and with coping mechanisms they can use to feel safe if they are scared, like asking for a hug or taking three slow breaths.

“The big goal of social stories is that it’s very helpful to have language to describe what you’re experiencing, and that’s what trauma can take away from you,” Hartline said. “So it is giving kids a framework to understand what happened and to know that even though it was scary, it’s OK to talk about.”

In drafting the story, Hartline faced a choice of whether to mention that the fire killed people.

“We don’t want to tell children anything more than we have to,” she said. “We don’t want to put anything new in their head that will scare them.

“But ultimately, I decided that these kids know about this, they were hearing about it, it was all over the news, and if we didn’t name it, it would become taboo and kids would think it was off-limits to talk about,” she said.

Hurricanes and earthquakes, too

Hartline isn’t the only one who has used storytelling to help kids cope with climate disasters.

Chandra Ghosh Ippen, a child psychologist at the University of California, San Francisco, was partnering with colleagues in New Orleans to address early childhood trauma when Hurricane Katrina hit. In the aftermath, she said, it quickly became clear “there was just not enough mental health support for families.”

The resulting book — “Trinka and Sam and the Rainy Windy Day" — tells the story of two mice who recently experienced a bad hurricane in their community and become afraid similar destruction could repeat during a less intense rainstorm. The book shows Trinka and Sam being comforted by their parents, and includes a “guide” at the end to help adults talk to kids about disaster-related fears.

When she wrote it, Ghosh Ippen thought the book was a one-off side project.

“Little did we know how many hurricanes there would be,” she said. “It’s really hard to think about how much more these little mice are needed now than when we started."

Since then, the little mice have helped children cope with tornadoes, earthquakes, wildfires and Covid-19. The books — which are available at no cost thanks to grants from the Early Trauma Treatment Network, National Child Traumatic Stress Network, and Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration — have been deployed by the government of Nepal and United Way in Puerto Rico to help families cope with earthquakes and hurricanes.

Ghosh Ippen, whose husband illustrates the books, is currently working on a new story about flooding.

Reading the books is sometimes the first time parents broach the topic of a disaster with their children, said Brymer at the UCLA National Center for Child Traumatic Stress, who has contributed to some of the more recent volumes.

"We often hear from parents, 'Well, my kids aren't talking about this thing we just went through, so I'm assuming that they are just resilient and weren't effected,'" she said. "But then as they read the story, their child will say, 'I feel like this character.' And the parent can also use the story to describe how they felt during the disaster. Reading the book shows your child, ‘OK, I'm here for you, we can talk about this.’"

Ghosh Ippen has sometimes worked with communities to help tailor the stories to conditions in their area. For example, following Hurricane Maria, the American Academy of Pediatrics’ Puerto Rico chapter reached out asking if she could change the mice’s names to something easier to pronounce in Spanish.

So "Trinka and Sam" became "Trinka y Juan."

Cindy Calderon, who was president of the chapter at the time, said she was also initially concerned that a story centering on mice could send the wrong message to children who, following the storm, were being told to steer clear of vermin due to concerns about infectious disease spreading through contact with rats.

“I was worried about how the kids would relate to it, but Chandra explained to me that they would see Trinka y Juan like Mickey Mouse,” she said.

United Way ultimately distributed more than 22,000 copies of the updated story across the island, complete with a survey. Calderon used the story in trainings she held for preschool and day care providers about how toddlers’ behaviors may have been affected by what they experienced during the storm and its aftermath.

“In a disaster, emotional and mental health for kids is an afterthought, because you are in crisis and your life and your resources are threatened,” Calderon said. “But now we have a whole population that has been very effected that needs to learn to cope.”

During one training, which took place during a rainstorm, a parent told Calderon about heightened anxiety she felt any time there was inclement weather following the hurricane.

“I was able to use the book to say, ‘That’s exactly how your kids feel. But they don’t have the same reasoning as you to know why this rain is different or why this windy day is different,’” she said. “The book helps them feel safe again.”

Reprinted from E&E News with permission from POLITICO, LLC. Copyright 2024. E&E News provides essential news for energy and environment professionals.

Books are trash too: Remember to throw them away during spring cleaning

I used to hold on to books as if they were cash, before realizing that all books are not created equally, by d. watkins.

Trashing books has the power to save the publishing industry.

Spring cleaning has become a universal time to declutter our lives , chucking everything we no longer need. Those jeans you can't fit anymore and maybe will never be able to fit again. Your iPhone 3, unless you are an archivist who is planning to have an exhibit based upon technology that we'll never use again. And your mail, go through it. You don't need to save the red light ticket from 2023 because if you didn't pay it by now, I'm pretty sure you already paid to remove the boot or took care of it when you paid your 10 other tickets from Motor Vehicles. 

I try to do this every year and have to say that I am getting better with time because, in 2024, I purged some items that were near and dear to my heart, items I never thought I had the heart to get rid of: books. Yes, I got rid of books. 

Before you begin tearing me apart, I did not throw all the books in the trash ; only about 30, and the rest of the books will be donated to an organization in Baltimore called The Book Thing, which frequently hosts giveaways. But yes, there are now about 100 books erased from my library, and I am so happy for several reasons. I'll start by addressing the elephant in the room, which you and I both know but up until now would never say. So, imagine me standing on top of a soapbox, dead center in the middle of a crowd of about 1,000 people, yelling at the top of my lungs, "All books are not created equal!"

This is when you may click off of this article, storm out of your room, slam the door behind you or become ambitious by writing a nasty letter to my editor. But before you do that, let me just tell you a little bit about my process and the books that are currently sitting at the bottom of my trash can. 

Most of the books that made it into my donation pile were celebrity memoirs that were beautifully written and surprisingly inspiring. 

My system isn't intricate or complex at all, as it is solely based on two general rules that are summarized in these questions:

Is this book so good that it deserves to be read by someone who can be inspired as well? 

Is this book so bad that I would never want to punish another person by mistakenly having it fall into their hands? 

Most of the books that made it into my donation pile were celebrity memoirs that were beautifully written and surprisingly inspiring. For full transparency, I never got into celebrity memoirs until I was given assignments to cover them for work – and then became more interested in the genre when I started writing them myself. Gabrielle Union has a beautiful memoir, as does Viola Davis, Chelsea Handler and Chef Kwame Onwuachi , to name a few. These books are hysterical, informative and most importantly, easy to read. 

My opinion could be biased, but those books are often written by highly talented writers who don't always get the promotion or backing behind their books that they deserve. So ghostwriting is the only way they could eke out a decent career. Many of the celebrity memoirs I have are directly connected to people I covered for work over the years; however, I buy them for myself from time to time, and they don't need to be a part of my library. I've learned the lessons, I will not revisit. They take up space, and we are spring cleaning, so it is time to pass them on. 

We've had all kinds of literary crises in my hometown of Baltimore. As a writer with some local success, I donated boxes of books like "Beloved" by Toni Morrison, "The Fire Next Time" by James Baldwin and "Their Eyes Were Watching God" by Zora Neale Hurston.

Your bookshelf should be beautiful enough to make it onto someone's Pinterest page. I don't even know if people still use Pinterest, but if they do then your bookshelf should be on there. You shouldn't have a bookshelf that has nothing but books. You need a cute little woven basket, or a little statue from your ceramics class or maybe that plaque you got from work from being employee of the month or something, but you got to spice it up, you got to make it look good and you're not going to do it if you're holding on to that celebrity memoir that you are never going to open again.

Some of the classics should be donated as well. We've had all kinds of literary crises in my hometown of Baltimore. As a writer with some local success, I donated boxes of books like "Beloved" by Toni Morrison , "The Fire Next Time" by James Baldwin and "Their Eyes Were Watching God" by Zora Neale Hurston. These are books that our young people need to read; they need to see themselves in the history of this country, they need to see themselves in the present, and they need to see themselves in the future. We have an opportunity to do this if we stop hoarding books.

And then there is the trash pile.

If we hate some artwork, hate some of the food from some fancy restaurants that are supposed to be great, and hate the design, fabric, and everything related to some of the furniture we feel shouldn't have been created – then why can't we hate books? There's an awful stigma that we hold on to when talking about books that we need to release immediately. Your favorite singer's sophomore album can suck, but a book can't? So now everyone can write? 

Why must we sit up on our high horse and act like books are the one thing you can never get rid of? This could not be further from the truth, and I'm embarrassed that it took me so long to figure this out. Books can be trash just like that horrific excuse for artwork you made at some Sip and Paint you attended on a corny date night.  

So, as I did my spring cleaning, I threw away a book called "eBay for Dummies" because what is this, 1990? I trashed a book about a faultless preacher who saved his entire congregation because red flags flooded the first paragraph, and I tossed out a lovely tale about a pop singer who was forced to sell bricks of cocaine for the Mexican cartel as she soared up the R&B charts. There was also a collection of old college books that should have been in the dump a long time ago as well, like that Business 101 book that taught you nothing about business, and any book that was written by the professor, who you also had to buy the book from – and about 90% of your pity purchases. This is the part where you can call me a terrible person, but this is also how we can save the publishing industry. 

 A pity purchase is a book that you bought because you felt sympathy for the person selling it – and yes, as a person who wrote eight books, I have definitely been on the other side of pity purchases. These purchases often happen at empty readings or book fairs where you sit alone at your table with that big stack of work that you poured your heart and soul into, Sharpie in hand, ready to sign as everyone walks past you. People will walk past you for hours, but then from the shadows emerges a grandma with two big watery slits for eyes that glisten and gleam as she slides towards you and says something like, “I can't believe you wrote a whole book, sonny. I’ll buy one!" And you quickly pull it away from the stack. You sign it because you know once your signature is in that book that she can't take it to the bookseller’s brick and mortar and return it, that book is hers, and she stuck with it for life. And from this transaction you received that one little piece of hope, that makes you feel like you're writing and career aren't entirely worthless. That grandma gives you the industry to push forward. But maybe she can't do that if her bookshelf is full of 300 pity purchases . . . so we must purge. 

The point is that you got the sale, so you don't have to punish the person by expecting them to read it or hold on to it. It is totally cool if grandma throws that book in the trash because it belongs to her; she bought it. 

I feel so good now that I have cleaned off my bookshelves. And guess what? Not only do I have space to make my shelves look cute enough to be on someone's Pinterest page, but I can also make some more pity purchases — the kind of pity purchases that keep our industry alive. 

So do yourself a favor this spring and go throw some books away. 

about this topic

• D. Watkins' Salon 5: The five unexpected books on D's summer reading list
• Viola Davis shares regrets over acting in "The Help": The "voices of the maids" weren’t heard
• "I tried on the American dream": CNN analyst Natasha Alford on finding success without assimilating

D. Watkins is an Editor at Large for Salon. He is also a writer on the HBO limited series "We Own This City" and a professor at the University of Baltimore. Watkins is the author of the award-winning, New York Times best-selling memoirs “ The Beast Side: Living  (and Dying) While Black in America ”, " The Cook Up: A Crack Rock Memoir ," " Where Tomorrows Aren't Promised: A Memoir of Survival and Hope " as well as " We Speak For Ourselves: How Woke Culture Prohibits Progress ." His new books, " Black Boy Smile: A Memoir in Moments ," and " The Wire: A Complete Visual History " are out now.

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Once Upon a Time, the World of Picture Books Came to Life

The tale behind a new museum of children’s literature is equal parts imagination, chutzpah and “The Little Engine That Could.”

By Elisabeth Egan

Photographs and Video by Chase Castor

Elisabeth Egan followed the Rabbit Hole as it was nearing completion. She has written about several of its inhabitants for The Times.

On a crisp Saturday morning that screamed for adventure, a former tin can factory in North Kansas City, Mo., thrummed with the sound of young people climbing, sliding, spinning, jumping, exploring and reading.

Yes, reading.

If you think this is a silent activity, you haven’t spent time in a first grade classroom. And if you think all indoor destinations for young people are sticky, smelly, depressing hellholes, check your assumptions at the unmarked front door.

Welcome to the Rabbit Hole, a brand-new, decade-in-the-making museum of children’s literature founded by the only people with the stamina for such a feat: former bookstore owners. Pete Cowdin and Deb Pettid are long-married artists who share the bullish determination of the Little Red Hen. They’ve transformed the hulking old building into a series of settings lifted straight from the pages of beloved picture books.

Before we get into what the Rabbit Hole is, here’s what it isn’t: a place with touch screens, a ball pit, inscrutable plaques, velvet ropes, a cloying soundtrack or adults in costumes. It doesn’t smell like graham crackers, apple juice or worse (yet). At $16 per person over 2 years old, it also isn’t cheap.

During opening weekend on March 16, the museum was a hive of freckles and gap toothed grins, with visitors ranging in age from newborn to well seasoned. Cries of “Look up here!,” “There’s a path we need to take!” and “There’s Good Dog Carl !” created a pleasant pandemonium. For every child galloping into the 30,000 square foot space, there was an adult hellbent on documenting the moment.

Did you ever have to make a shoe box diorama about your favorite book? If so, you might remember classmates who constructed move-in ready mini kingdoms kitted out with gingham curtains, clothespin people and actual pieces of spaghetti.

Cowdin, Pettid and their team are those students, all grown up.

The main floor of the Rabbit Hole consists of 40 book-themed dioramas blown up to life-size and arranged, Ikea showroom-style, in a space the size of two hockey rinks. The one inspired by John Steptoe’s “ Uptown ” features a pressed tin ceiling, a faux stained-glass window and a jukebox. In the great green room from “ Goodnight Moon ,” you can pick up an old-fashioned phone and hear the illustrator’s son reading the story.

One fictional world blends into the next, allowing characters to rub shoulders in real life just as they do on a shelf. Visitors slid down the pole in “The Fire Cat,” slithered into the gullet of the boa constrictor in “ Where the Sidewalk Ends ” and lounged in a faux bubble bath in “ Harry the Dirty Dog .” There are plenty of familiar faces — Madeline , Strega Nona , Babar — but just as many areas dedicated to worthy titles that don’t feature household names, including “ Crow Boy ,” “ Sam and the Tigers ,” “ Gladiola Garden ” and “ The Zabajaba Jungle .”

Emma Miller, a first-grade teacher, said, “So many of these are books I use in my classroom. It’s immersive and beautiful. I’m overwhelmed.”

As her toddler bolted toward “ Frog and Toad ,” Taylar Brown said, “We love opportunities to explore different sensory things for Mason. He has autism so this is a perfect place for him to find little hiding holes.”

A gaggle of boys reclined on a bean bag in “ Caps for Sale ,” passing around a copy of the book. Identical twins sounded out “ Bread and Jam for Frances ” on the pink rug in the badger’s house. A 3-year-old visiting for the second time listened to her grandfather reading “The Tawny Scrawny Lion.”

Tomy Tran, a father of three from Oklahoma, said, “I’ve been to some of these indoor places and it’s more like a jungle gym. Here, my kids will go into the area, pick up the book and actually start reading it as if they’re in the story.”

All the titles scattered around the museum are available for purchase at the Lucky Rabbit, a bookstore arranged around a cozy amphitheater. Pettid and Cowdin estimate that they’ve sold one book per visitor, with around 650 guests per day following the pink bunny tracks from the parking lot.

Once upon a time, Cowdin and Pettid owned the Reading Reptile, a Kansas City institution known not just for its children’s books but also for its literary installations. When Dav Pilkey came to town, Pettid and Cowdin welcomed him by making a three-and-a-half foot papier-mâché Captain Underpants. Young customers pitched in to build Tooth-Gnasher Superflash or the bread airplane from “In the Night Kitchen.”

One of the store’s devotees was Meg McMath, who continued to visit through college, long after she’d outgrown its offerings (and its chairs). Now 36, McMath traveled from Austin, Texas with her husband and six-month-old son to see the Rabbit Hole. “I’ve cried a few times,” she said.

The Reading Reptile weathered Barnes & Noble superstores and Amazon. Then came “the Harry Potter effect,” Pettid said, “where all of a sudden adults wanted kids to go from picture books to thick chapter books. They skipped from here to there; there was so much they were missing.”

As parents fell under the sway of reading lists for “gifted” kids, story time became yet another proving ground.

“It totally deformed the reading experience,” Cowdin said. Not to mention the scourge of every bookstore: surreptitious photo-snappers who later shopped online.

In 2016, Cowdin and Pettid closed the Reptile to focus on the Rabbit Hole, an idea they’d been percolating for years. They hoped it would be a way to spread the organic bookworm spirit they’d instilled in their five children while dialing up representation for readers who had trouble finding characters who looked like them. The museum would celebrate classics, forgotten gems and quality newcomers. How hard could it be?

Cowdin and Pettid had no experience in the nonprofit world. They knew nothing about fund-raising or construction. They’re ideas people, glass half full types, idealists but also stubborn visionaries. They didn’t want to hand their “dream” — a word they say in quotes — to consultants who knew little about children’s books. Along the way, board members resigned. Their kids grew up. Covid descended. A tree fell on their house and they had to live elsewhere for a year. “I literally have told Pete I quit 20 times,” Pettid said.

“It has not always been pleasant,” Cowdin said. “But it was just like, OK, we’re going to do this and then we’re going to figure out how to do it. And then we just kept figuring it out.”

Little by little, chugging along like “ The Little Engine That Could ,” they raised $15 million and assembled a board who embraced their vision and commitment to Kansas City. They made a wish list of books — “Every ethnicity. Every gender. Every publisher,” Pettid said — and met with rights departments and authors’ estates about acquiring permissions. Most were receptive; some weren’t. (They now have rights to more than 70 titles.)

“A lot of people think a children’s bookstore is very cute,” Pettid said. “They have a small mind for children’s culture. That’s why we had to buy this building.”

For $2 million, they bought the factory from Robert Riccardi, an architect whose family operated a beverage distribution business there for two decades. His firm, Multistudio, worked with Cowdin and Pettid to reimagine the space, which sits on an industrial corner bordered by train tracks, highways and skyline views.

Cowdin and Pettid started experimenting with layouts. Eventually they hired 39 staff members, including 21 full-time artists and fabricators who made everything in the museum from some combination of steel, wood, foam, concrete and papier-mâché.

“My parents are movers and shakers,” Gloria Cowdin said. She’s the middle of the five siblings, named after Frances the badger’s sister — and, yes, that’s her voice reading inside the exhibit. “There’s never been something they’ve wanted to achieve that they haven’t made happen, no matter how crazy.”

During a sneak peek in December, it was hard to imagine how this semi-construction zone would coalesce into a museum. The 22,000 square foot fabrication section was abuzz with drills and saws. A whiteboard showed assembly diagrams and punch lists. (Under “Random jobs,” someone had jotted, “Write Christmas songs.”) The entryway and lower level — known as the grotto and the burrow — were warrens of scaffolding and machinery.

But there were pockets of calm. Kelli Harrod worked on a fresco of trees outside the “ Blueberries for Sal ” kitchen, unfazed by the hubbub. In two years as lead painter, she’d witnessed the Rabbit Hole’s steady growth.

“I remember painting the ‘ Pérez and Martina ’ house before there was insulation,” Harrod said. “I was bundled up in hats, gloves and coats, making sure my hands didn’t shake.”

Leigh Rosser was similarly nonplused while describing his biggest challenge as design fabrication lead. Problem: How to get a dragon and a cloud to fly above a grand staircase in “ My Father’s Dragon .” Solution: “It’s really simple, conceptually” — it didn’t sound simple — “but we’re dealing with weight in the thousands of pounds, mounted up high. We make up things that haven’t been done before, or at least that I’m not aware of.”

Attention to detail extends to floor-bound exhibits. The utensil drawer in “Blueberries for Sal” holds Pete Cowdin’s mother’s egg whisk alongside a jar containing a baby tooth that belonged to Cowdin and Pettid’s oldest daughter, Sally. The tooth is a wink at “ One Morning in Maine ,” an earlier Robert McCloskey book involving a wiggly bicuspid — or was it a molar? If dental records are available, Cowdin and Pettid have consulted them for accuracy.

“With Pete and Deb, it’s about trying to picture what they’re seeing in their minds,” said Brian Selznick , a longtime friend who helped stock the shelves in the Lucky Rabbit. He’s the author of “ The Invention of Hugo Cabret ,” among many other books.

Three months ago, the grotto looked like a desert rock formation studded with pink Chiclets. The burrow, home of Fox Rabbit, the museum’s eponymous mascot, was dark except for sparks blasting from a soldering iron. The floor was covered with tiny metal letters reclaimed from a newly-renovated donor wall at a local museum.

Cowdin and Pettid proudly explained their works-in-progress; these were the parts of the museum that blossomed from seed in their imaginations. But to the naked eye, they had the charm of a bulkhead door leading to a scary basement.

When the museum opened to the public, the grotto and the burrow suddenly made sense. The pink Chiclets are books, more than 3000 of them — molded in silicone, cast in resin — incorporated into the walls, the stairs and the floor. They vary from an inch-and-a-half to three inches thick. As visitors descend into the Rabbit Hole, they can run their fingers over the edges of petrified volumes. They can clamber over rock formations that include layers of books. Or they can curl up and read.

Dennis Butt, another longtime Rabbit Hole employee, molded 92 donated books into the mix, including his own copies of “ The Hobbit ” and “ The Lord of the Rings .” He said, “They’re a little piece of me.”

As for the metal letters, they’re pressed into the walls of a blue-lit tunnel leading up a ramp to the first floor. They spell the first lines of 141 books, including “ Charlotte’s Web ,” “Devil in the Drain” and “ Martha Speaks .” Some were easier to decipher than others, but “Mashed potatoes are to give everybody enough” jumped out. It called to mind another line from “A Hole is to Dig,” Ruth Krauss’s book of first definitions (illustrated by a young Maurice Sendak ): “The world is so you have something to stand on.”

At the Rabbit Hole, books are so you have something to stand on. They’re the bedrock and the foundation; they’re the solid ground.

Cowdin and Pettid have plans to expand into three more floors, adding exhibit space, a print shop, a story lab, a resource library and discovery galleries. An Automat-style cafeteria and George and Martha -themed party and craft room will open soon. A rooftop bar is also in the works.

Of course, museum life isn’t all happily ever after. Certain visitors whined, whinged and wept, especially as they approached the exit. One weary adult said, “Charlie, we did it all.”

Then, “Charlie, it’s time to go.”

And finally, “Fine, Charlie, we’re leaving you here.” Cue hysteria.

But the moral of this story — and the point of the museum, and maybe the point of reading, depending on who you share books with — crystallized in a quiet moment in the great green room. A boy in a Chiefs Super Bowl T-shirt pretended to fall asleep beneath a fleecy blanket. Before closing his eyes, he said, “Goodnight, Grandma. Love you to the moon.”

Elisabeth Egan is a writer and editor at the Times Book Review. She has worked in the world of publishing for 30 years. More about Elisabeth Egan

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