The Classroom | Empowering Students in Their College Journey

How to Write a Speech to Win School Captain

Mary Dowd

Tips on Writing a Welcome Address at a High School Graduation

Writing and delivering a winning speech for a school leadership role requires planning, a sense of purpose and practice. No matter whether you are hoping to be picked for school captain, school president or class president, you need to convince others that you really, really want the job for all the right reasons. Make your speech less about you and more about what you can do to serve others and make a difference.

What Is a School Captain?

A school or class captain in the British school system is like a school or class president in the American school system. Despite different titles, the roles are similar. The purpose of a student leadership position is to act as a positive role model, encourage school spirit and embody school beliefs and values. A school captain is a go-between for teachers and students to represent the student voice and to ensure excellent two-way communication.

School Captain Responsibilities

Duties vary somewhat by school, but typically, assignments include bringing forward student concerns to the administration to advocate for positive change, such as healthier food options on the school menu and in vending machines. Student leaders may head a committee to plan student activities that will build a sense of community. Other tasks may include giving tours of the school to visitors and greeting parents who are attending functions.

Serious School Captain Speeches

Before launching your campaign or drafting your speech, interview a cross section of your classmates to find out what they like about the school and what improvements they hope to see in the upcoming year. Develop a consistent message in your campaign materials and speech that identifies your goals based on an assessment of student needs.

Do not fall into the trap of making grandiose promises just to be chosen by administration or voted into office. The tone of your speech should be upbeat, positive and high energy to hold your listeners' attention.

Humorous Class Captain Speech

If you are witty, outgoing and considered the class clown, you may want to interject humor into your speech. A funny but teacher-approved story will show your likable and relatable side.

For instance, you may want to share that you were cast as a juggler in the school play when making the point that you are experienced at juggling multiple tasks. However, do not go overboard with humor, or you run the risk of not being seen as a serious contender who will work hard.

Prepare Your Speech

Speeches are like English essays, with a strong beginning, middle and end. Keep in mind how much time you will be allotted because you may be cut off if you exceed the time limit. Outline your speech with main points and then write out your speech to avoid stumbling on your words or rambling.

Start with an introduction that includes your name, year in school and the reasons you are highly qualified to serve as school captain. List specific examples of your prior accomplishments in extracurricular activities and student organizations. Mention that you are a visionary student who believes every student should feel welcome and supported at the school.

In the body of your speech, identity two or three goals or issues you would like to address if selected for the position. Emphasize your leadership qualities. For instance, you might state that other students and teachers would describe you as outgoing, approachable, dedicated and responsible. End with an action statement summarizing what you hope to accomplish and directly ask for their vote or support. Show a draft of your speech to a favorite teacher and ask for feedback.

Practice Your Speech

Stand in front of a mirror at home and practice your speech or enlist your family as an audience. You should sound eager and excited to represent and serve fellow students. Smile, maintain good eye contact and use gestures intentionally. Speak clearly and articulate your words. Pretend you are confident even if you are shaking and super nervous. That is perfectly normal and does not mean you are not leadership material.

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Dr. Mary Dowd is a dean of students whose job includes student conduct, leading the behavioral consultation team, crisis response, retention and the working with the veterans resource center. She enjoys helping parents and students solve problems through advising, teaching and writing online articles that appear on many sites. Dr. Dowd also contributes to scholarly books and journal articles.

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Writing an Effective Year 12 School Captain Speech: A Guide to Winning the Election

Unlock the Secrets to Crafting a Winning School Captain Speech

Introduction: The role of a school captain is not just about holding a prestigious title; it’s about being a leader and making a positive impact on your school community. One crucial aspect of the election process is delivering an effective speech that captivates your audience and convinces them to vote for you. In this comprehensive guide, we will explore the strategies and techniques to write and deliver an impactful Year 12 School Captain speech that will help you win the election and make a difference in your school.

Understanding the Role of a School Captain: Leadership and Responsibilities

Gain a clear understanding of the role and responsibilities of a Year 12 School Captain. Explore the qualities and attributes that make an effective leader and how they translate into your speech.

Researching and Analyzing Your Audience: Knowing Your School Community

Learn the importance of understanding your audience and tailoring your speech to resonate with them. Conduct research to gather insights about your school community’s values, concerns, and aspirations.

Crafting a Powerful Opening: Grabbing Attention from the Start

Discover techniques to create a memorable opening that captures the attention of your audience. Explore storytelling, thought-provoking statements, or inspiring quotes to establish a strong connection.

Developing a Clear Structure: Organizing Your Speech Effectively

Learn how to structure your speech to convey your message coherently. Explore the use of introduction, body, and conclusion to ensure a logical flow and make your points compelling.

Showcasing Your Qualities and Accomplishments: Building Credibility

Highlight your strengths, experiences, and accomplishments to establish credibility and demonstrate your suitability for the role of School Captain. Use anecdotes, examples, or testimonials to support your claims.

Addressing Key Issues and Concerns: Connecting with Your Audience

Identify and address the issues and concerns that matter to your school community. Show empathy, propose solutions, and share your vision for a better school environment.

Sharing Your Future Plans: Inspiring Action and Change

Articulate your vision and goals for the school. Outline specific initiatives, events, or improvements you intend to implement if elected as School Captain. Inspire your audience to take action and join your cause.

Utilizing Language Techniques: Persuasion and Emotional Appeal

Explore rhetorical devices, such as metaphors, parallelism, or rhetorical questions, to enhance the persuasive impact of your speech. Use emotional appeal to connect with your audience on a deeper level.

Practicing Effective Delivery: Confidence and Authenticity

Discover strategies to enhance your delivery skills , including vocal variety, body language, and eye contact. Practice your speech to ensure confidence and authenticity in your delivery.

Closing with a Memorable Conclusion: Leave a Lasting Impression

Craft a powerful and inspiring conclusion that summarizes your main points and leaves a lasting impression. Use a call to action or an uplifting message to motivate your audience to vote for you.

FAQs – How to Write a Winning Year 12 School Captain Speech?

1: how long should a school captain speech be.

Aim for a speech duration of around 3-5 minutes to effectively convey your message without losing your audience’s attention.

2: Should I include personal anecdotes in my speech?

Personal anecdotes can be impactful and help create a connection with your audience. However, ensure they are relevant to your message and add value to your overall speech.

3: How can I engage the audience during my speech?

Engage your audience through eye contact, inviting them to participate, or incorporating interactive elements, such as asking rhetorical questions or involving them in a brief activity.

4: Is it necessary to memorize my entire speech?

While memorization can provide a sense of confidence, it is important to maintain a balance between memorization and spontaneity. Memorize key points and practice enough to ensure a smooth delivery.

5: How can I handle nervousness before and during my speech?

Prepare thoroughly, practice regularly, and visualize yourself delivering a successful speech. Deep breathing exercises and positive self-talk can also help manage nervousness.

6: Should I mention other candidates in my speech?

Avoid directly criticizing or mentioning other candidates. Focus on presenting your unique qualities, ideas, and plans to stand out as the best candidate.

7: How can I make my speech memorable?

Use storytelling, vivid imagery, or powerful quotes to make your speech memorable . Aim to inspire, uplift, and leave a lasting impression on your audience.

Here are a few examples of a school captain speech:

Example 1: “Dear fellow students, teachers, and staff, today I stand before you as a candidate for the position of School Captain. I believe that our school is more than just a place of learning; it is a community that fosters growth, friendship, and opportunity. If elected, I promise to be a dedicated and approachable leader who will listen to your concerns and work tirelessly to address them. Together, we can create a school environment that encourages inclusivity, excellence, and personal development. Let us embrace our differences and celebrate our achievements, for united we can make our school truly exceptional.”   Example 2: “Respected principal, teachers, and my fellow students, I am honored to be standing here as a candidate for the role of School Captain. Our school is not just a building; it is a place where dreams are nurtured and futures are shaped. If entrusted with the responsibility, I will strive to be a beacon of inspiration and encouragement for all students. I will work closely with our teachers and staff to ensure that each one of us has the support and resources we need to excel academically and personally. Let us embark on a journey of growth, unity, and achievement, making our school a shining example of excellence.   Example 3: “Dear everyone, today I am humbled to stand before you as a candidate for the position of School Captain. Our school is more than just classrooms and textbooks; it is a vibrant community that thrives on enthusiasm and participation. If chosen as your leader, I will promote a culture of involvement, where every student’s voice is heard and valued. Together, we can organize exciting events, foster a sense of belonging, and create memories that will last a lifetime. Let us come together as a united front, supporting and inspiring one another to reach new heights. Vote for me, and together, we’ll make our school experience truly unforgettable.”

Key Points:

  • Understand the role of a School Captain and the qualities of an effective leader.
  • Research your audience and tailor your speech to their values and concerns.
  • Craft a powerful opening , organize your speech effectively, and showcase your qualities.
  • Address key issues and propose solutions while sharing your future plans.
  • Utilize language techniques, practice effective delivery, and close with a memorable conclusion.
Bio: The author, an experienced public speaker and advocate of youth leadership, shares valuable insights in “Writing an Effective Year 12 School Captain Speech: A Guide to Winning the Election.” With a passion for empowering students, the author provides practical tips and strategies to help aspiring School Captains create impactful speeches and make a positive impact on their school community.

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  • Effective Public Speaking Techniques for School Leadership Roles.
  • The Role of Empathy in School Captain Speeches: Building Connections.
  • Comparing Speech Styles: Inspirational vs. Informative School Captain Speeches.
  • Overcoming Stage Fright: Tips for Confident School Captain Speech Delivery.
  • Balancing Confidence and Humility in School Captain Speeches.
  • Analyzing Past Successful School Captain Speeches: What Made Them Stand Out?
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Answer ( 1 )

Carter

In this guide, we’ll give you everything you need to know about writing a winning speech for the school captain election. First, we’ll show you some example speeches from past winners and finalists to give you an idea of what a successful speech might look like. Then we’ll talk about how to craft your own outline and where to find inspiration for topics in your own life. Finally, we’ll cover some tips for how best to deliver your speech if it all goes well with writing it!

School captain speech examples

In this article, we’ll look at the speeches that won school captain elections. We’ll also give you some tips on how to write your own winning speech for a school captain election.

We’ve got two examples of speeches that were given by students who went on to win their school captain elections: one from an Australian high school student and another from an American middle school student. Both speeches are very good because they have all the elements of a great speech–they’re funny, they have interesting facts and stories in them (which keeps people engaged), and both speakers talk about things that relate directly back to themselves or their peers (so they make it easy for listeners).

School captain speech topic ideas

Here are some ideas for school captain speech topics:

  • The importance of school spirit.
  • Why it’s important to give back to the community.
  • How you plan on making your school better by becoming a leader and role model for others.

How to write a great school captain speech outline

To write a great speech outline, you need to follow these three steps:

  • Start with a hook. You want to grab your audience’s attention right away. This can be done by using an interesting fact or statistic that relates to the topic of your speech, or by telling a story that illustrates what you’re going to talk about later on in the speech. If possible, try not to use any quotes from movies or other sources unless it’s absolutely necessary for illustrating your point (and even then, only use them sparingly).
  • Use strong openings and closings when writing out your speech outline–and make sure both are relevant! Don’t forget about these two sections because they are just as important as any other part of writing an effective school captain election speech outline; if nothing else comes across strongly enough for voters during these sections then there won’t be much left worth remembering later on down in middle parts like introduction paragraph(s), body paragraphs(s) etcetera…

How to write a winning school captain speech

  • Use the right tone
  • Use the right body language
  • Use the right content and style of speech
  • Deliver your speech effectively

A winning school captain speech can help you win the election.

A good school captain speech can help you win the election. If you’re running for school captain and want to give an impressive speech that will make everyone remember you, then this article is for you!

To write a great school captain speech outline:

  • Think about your audience. What do they want from their new leader? What are their hopes and dreams for the future of the school? How can they see themselves reflected in your words?
  • Have a clear message. Make sure that everything in your talk ties back into what makes YOU special – why should people vote for YOU instead of anyone else who wants this job too (and there will almost certainly be other candidates). Don’t try too hard though; keep it simple!

With the help of these school captain speech examples, you can write a great speech that will help you win your election. It’s important to remember that you don’t have to write from scratch and there are plenty of resources available online. Just make sure that whatever you do use is original and doesn’t copy anyone else’s work!

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How to Write a Better Captain Speech

Table of Contents

Are you feeling nervous about your upcoming class captain speech? Don’t worry; you’re not alone!

Writing a class captain speech can be daunting and nerve-wracking. It’s a significant opportunity to share your passion for the role and show everyone why you are the right person for the job.

But don’t let fear stop you from being successful — with some planning and preparation, writing an excellent class captain speech is easy! Keep reading to learn how to write a class captain speech .

Who Is a Class Captain?

A class captain is a leader in their classroom who promotes positive behavior, encourages classmates to follow school rules. A class captain acts as a role model.

They are also responsible for encouraging collaboration among students and helping to build community spirit. As the class captain, you should be prepared to act as an ambassador for your classroom on special occasions or during school events.

Characteristics of a Class Captain

Being a class captain is an important role and requires certain qualities. A great class captain should:

  • Show enthusiasm and excitement for the job.
  • Be well-prepared to take on the responsibilities of the role.
  • Have strong communication skills, including public speaking.
  • Be able to resolve conflicts between students or with teachers in a mature manner.
  • Inspire other students to be their best by setting an example of hard work and dedication.

Structure of a Class Captain Speech

  • Introduction – Introduce yourself and share why you are the right person for the job.
  • Strengths – Highlight the strengths that make you an ideal class captain and how these will benefit the classroom.
  • Goals – Explain what you plan to achieve as a class captain, such as improving student morale or increasing participation in school activities.
  • Conclusion – Summarize your message with a call to action, encouraging other students to support you in becoming their class leader.

How to Write a Class Captain Speech

kids in spiderman and Captain America costumes

Step 1: Start by Introducing Yourself

Your introduction is critical because it sets the tone and helps people understand who you are. Start by introducing yourself to your classmates, letting them know what year of school you’re in. Add any other relevant information that might help give context to your speech.

Step 2: Outline Your Strengths and Abilities.

Now that you’ve introduced yourself, it’s time to explain why you are the right person for the job. Share with them your strengths and qualities that make you a great class captain. Things like having strong communication skills or being organized and reliable.

Step 3: Explain What Goals You Plan to Achieve As Class Captain

You should also talk about the goals and objectives you plan to accomplish during your tenure as class captain. These include increasing student participation in school events or improving classroom morale. Talk about how you will go about achieving these goals and how they will benefit the classroom environment.

Step 4: Conclude With a Call to Action.

Finally, wrap up your speech with a call to action, encouraging your fellow students to support you in becoming their class captain. Ask them for their vote and remind them of the positive changes you plan to bring about as a leader.

Guideline for a Class Captain Speech

1. be prepared.

Before you start writing your class captain speech, it’s essential to do some research and learn more about what the role entails. This will help you outline the goals and objectives you plan to achieve as a leader.

2. Use Language Appropriately

Keeping the language of your speech simple is essential for connecting with your audience. Avoid using jargon or overly complex words, and stick to examples that everyone in the classroom can relate to.

3. Keep It Short & Sweet

People have short attention spans, so keep your class captain’s speech concise and to the point. Aim for up to two minutes in length, but be bold and take longer if you need to.

4. Make It Personal

Your speech should be about your goals for the role, so make sure it reflects your personality and passions. This is an excellent opportunity to show everyone why you are the perfect class captain!

5. Practice

Once you’ve written your speech, practice delivering it out loud several times until you feel comfortable with the content and delivery. This will help reduce anxiety or nervousness when it comes time to deliver it in front of your classmates.

Sample of a Class Captain Speech

Good morning everyone! My name is John, and I’m running for class captain this year.

I’m the right person for the job because I have strong communication skills and a passion for helping others. As class captain, my goal will be to create a positive learning environment in our classroom where everyone feels respected and supported.

To accomplish this, I will work closely with teachers to ensure that all students follow school rules and behave appropriately. I will also strive to promote collaboration among classmates by organizing activities and encouraging teamwork. Finally, I’ll work hard to increase student participation in school events, so everyone can get involved and have fun together! With your support, we can make this a fantastic year.

So please, join me in making our classroom a better place by voting for me as your class captain! Thank you.

Writing a class captain speech doesn’t have to be challenging or scary. With some planning and preparation, you can create an inspiring speech that will get your classmates excited about being part of the team .

That said, remember to introduce yourself, outline your strengths and abilities. Also, don’t forget to spell out your goals as a leader. Finally, conclude with a compelling call-to-action.

How to Write a Better Captain Speech

Abir Ghenaiet

Abir is a data analyst and researcher. Among her interests are artificial intelligence, machine learning, and natural language processing. As a humanitarian and educator, she actively supports women in tech and promotes diversity.

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Speech Guidelines for a School Captain Candidate Plus an Example

Being the school captain is among the things that many students strive to attain in school. Whilst some are fortunate to become leaders in their respective schools, others disappear into oblivion with their hopes forever shattered. One of the factors that separates winners from other candidates is the whole concept of speech making and delivery.

And when I’m talking about speech, I’m not talking about words just put together for the sole reason of announcing your candidature. These are very cleverly selected words that will arouse the students’ desire to elect you as their representative. It is true that when you fail to plan, you plan to fail. This maxim is also true in speeches. A speech that does not go through the guidelines explained below will not have the desired outcome.

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Speech Writing Guidelines for a School Captain

1. let your message be brief and precise.

Avoid using many filler words to make the speech long. With a long speech, you will obviously loose the attention of the audience. The speech should be short and content rich. It should be straight to the point. You should hit the nail while it is hot- the nail in this case refers to the first few minutes that the audience is attentive. Hit them with that punch line that will leave you glued to their minds. You should keep your explanations minimal and if you can do it without explanations, the better.

2. Simplicity is genius

As albert Einstein rightly put it, “If you can’t explain it simply, then you don’t understand it well enough.” The beauty of using simple language is that you reach a wide scope of students. Using complex and complicated jargon will isolate the audience and the message will not reach its intended destination.

Furthermore, you do not want your fellow students to think you are above them. If they cannot understand you, how will they trust you to deliver their grievances to the authorities above? While a technical jargon showcases your mastery of the language and may open for you unlimited opportunities in the future, at this point in time it would be advisable to speak in a language that befits a school setting. Do not forget that you will also be communicating to pupils of the lower grade. Do not overlook their votes, they are equally as important as other votes.

3. Content should be organized in point form.

The speech should be broken down into parts to make it more orderly and precise. The organization of the speech will be explained better in the outline section later in the article. Ensure that each paragraph has its own point. Each paragraph must begin with a topic sentence, followed by few supporting lines and these supporting sentences must be related to the topic sentence. The paragraphs should however be brief. Try not to go very deep into the topic at hand.

4. Exhibit qualities of a leader.

Whether you are delivering it before a congregation or just putting it on paper, there must be some level of authority that the people listening or reading can feel. Nobody wants to be represented by a coward. Naturally, people are conditioned to follow a courageous leader, who has authority and leads by example. Apart from that, kindly be as honest as possible in your speech. Do not promise things you cannot deliver. Mistrust is one deep pit you cannot salvage yourself from.

5. Use the first person.

This is quite obvious always use the first voice when referring to yourself and in second person when referring to the students or audience. It creates a form of bond between you and the students when you refer to them directly. Also, always use active voice, as it is more authoritative and direct. Passive voice is least effective when you call people into action. For instance, when you say, “We will beat them,” sounds more authoritative than saying, “They will be beaten by us.”

Planning is an integral part of a speech. An outline gives you the format or rather, a rough draft of what your speech should look like. Here is the basic format of a speech:

Introduction

Remember first impressions always last. The contents of your introduction and how you present it will either make you or break you. This is an important part of your speech, as this is the part which will either win the audience’s attention or lose it. The length of the introduction should be no more than 10% of the whole speech. So, if your speech is to last 5 minutes, then your introduction should take like 40 to 45 seconds. Here, you should provide your greetings, introduce yourself and state your purpose.

The body is the bulk of the speech, making 80% of it. What you intend to do when elected the school captain should falls within this segment. Each point should be kept in separate paragraphs and should be accompanied by few sentences shading more light on each one of them. You should however be brief and avoid going into too much details. This will bore the audience and will make the speech too long. The body should follow this format:

1 st  Paragraph

  • Topic sentence 1
  • 3-4 sentences supporting topic 1

2 nd  Paragraph

  • Topic sentence 2
  • 3-4 sentences supporting topic 2

3 rd  Paragraph

  • Topic sentence 3
  • 3-4 sentences supporting topic 3

This part should only be 10% of the speech. Your conclusive remarks are just as important as any other part of the speech. It would be absurd to give a mind blowing presentation and then have a lackluster ending. One of the best way of wrapping things up is by use of a famous quote with a few additional remarks or you may give thanks to all the people who have supported you to where you are. You may also opt to quickly summarize all your points, whichever way you choose it, when done correctly they are both equally effective.

Essay Sample for a School Captain

Dear students, teachers and the *insert school* community at large, good afternoon. It is yet again that time of the year that we have to exercise our individual rights to select the rightful leaders to represent us. I come at your presence, not as a leader but rather as a servant who will put your interests first before mine.

I have spent all my learning years in this school and I’m very aware of all the challenges that students go through. Each year, I have witnessed recurring issues that threaten the pillars of our institution, which are peace, love and unity. I’m here to put an end to that. Your humble servant speaking is *insert your Names*, sixth grade and I’m running for this year’s School Captain.

I have a confession to make. The idea of vying for the School Captain position was first initiated to me in the fourth grade by *insert teacher’s name*, who saw the leadership qualities in me. Mr./Mrs. *teacher*’s sentiments are also shared by other teachers and students, who have privately confided in me about my natural ability to inspire and mobilize people.

I would like to publicly thank them, because they are the spark that ignited this fire in me. My decision to vie for this position is a way of me giving back to this wonderful school. All the years I have spent in this here have been nothing, but good and memorable. Everyone in this school, including teachers and my fellow students have been wonderful and if I was to go back in time, I would still do it again here.

Coming from a very religious background, my parents taught me the importance of humility. That is the reason why I’m naturally humble, friendly and approachable. I believe all people are born equal and I give each person the respect he/she deserves. As most of you are aware, I have worked hand in hand with the outgoing School Captain to ensure that this institution is always running smoothly.

I would like to personally call upon you to come in large numbers during the voting period and continue what I already started with my predecessor. It does not matter who wins. The most important thing is that the process has to be free and fair. Let the voice of the people be heard, because injustice here is a threat to justice everywhere.

Lastly, I would like thank my parents, friends, teachers, students and everyone, who took part in molding me to become the person I am. If it were not for you, I wouldn’t be who I am today. I would also like to thank everyone who showed up to this function today. You sacrificed your precious time to come and lend us your ears. A great day is indeed seen in the morning. All the people that participated in this democratic practice are surely destined for greatness. They are the people who will bring good change to this wonderful nation in the future. Vote wisely, vote with your hearts. May God bless you. Thank you.

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School Captain Speech (Sample)

Speech for school captain.

To the principal, teachers and fellow students, good morning. Thank you for this opportunity to address the school and bring to your attention some few things I have noted. But before then, I want to thank you for your cooperation and teamwork and brotherly spirit you have accorded my team in the last week. It was a smooth, which allowed each one of us to focus on our academic excellence without mishap, and for that I am grateful. Am looking forward to having a similar week ahead, especially regarding discipline.

However , I want to bring the following issues to your concern. Littering in and about the compound is not only irresponsible of yourself, but also a crime against nature. We have borrowed our environment from future generations, and we have to preserve it for them. Therefore, for those who have been irresponsible with their waste kindly refrain from discarding it irresponsibly. Let us all work together to have a clean compound by being responsible for our waste. Having a clean compound won’t hurt, therefore, ensure you drop off your litter in its rightful places to improve the cleanliness standards of our institution.

Secondly , this coming week we expect to host several schools for literature symposium. We also have a football match scheduled next week on Friday. We expect each one of us to cooperate and display the best of ourselves to the visitors. We care about the image of our school, and we need to preserve it. For the football match, we need to maintain modesty and orderliness as we cheer our teams. Whichever team wins, the victory is ours and we need to support our players by cheering them.

Thirdly , the environmental club has requested everyone to join them in doing several community-based projects they have planned for. You can register with them and be part of our ambassadors of peace, who have decided to be part of a revolutionary movement aimed at improving the community around our school. The details of their projects will be communicated by the leadership of the group later. I urge you to join them and play a part in shaping the tomorrow we want by joining hands to leave a positive impact in our society.

Lastly , am expecting great cooperation from each one of us as we commence the week. For the upcoming football match, I wish both teams the best. Ensure you abide by the school policies promptly to stay away from trouble. Finally, I wish you a happy, peaceful and fruitful week. Thank you for listening.

Concisely , this article has described in detail the process of writing a good captain’s speech. It has featured important tips to consider and a short outline. Finally, there is an outline that culminates the lessons into one worked out an example for reference.

what to put in a speech for school captain

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100 Public-Speaking Jokes to Add Humor to Your Next Speech

100 Public-Speaking Jokes to Add Humor to Your Next Speech

So, if you are looking to add humor to your presentation, one of the best ways is to insert self-deprecating humor in the form of funny stories. A good story from your own personal experience will be easier to insert into your speech. The story will also create more of a shared experience with your audience. For details about how to use stories to add humor to your speech , click here.

With that being said, though, sometimes, you just need to get a quick laugh out of your audience. And good jokes can be a great way to lighten the mood. We’ve organized the post into four categories of public-speaking jokes.

100 Public Speaking Jokes to Add Humor to Your Next Speech.

  • Public-Speaking Jokes .
  • One-Liners about Public Speaking and Presenting .
  • Funny Public Speaking Quotes .
  • Dad Jokes that You Can Use as Presentation Icebreakers .

Public-Speaking Jokes for Your Next Presentation to Add a Little Fun.

Between you and I, telling jokes in front of an audience is pretty risky. But sometimes, just getting the audience to laugh right from the start can lighten the mood. Here are a few jokes about public speaking that you can use when you are public speaking.

Jokes about Being Nervous and the Fear of Public Speaking

7 Presentation Habits that Make Your Nervous Speaker

  • Why did the public speaker hire a pitching coach? Because he needed to improve his delivery!
  • I used to think I was afraid of public speaking, but just now, I realized I was actually afraid of audiences.
  • A public speaker asked the audience, “How many of you are afraid of public speaking?” About half the audience raised their hands. The speaker replied, “Don’t worry, I used to be too. In fact, there was a 50/50 chance that I’d canceled today’s talk!”
  • My wife was nervous about public speaking. So, I told her she should embrace her mistake to add a little humor to her delivery. She gave me a hug. Then she laughed.
  • Public speaking tip: Imagine the audience naked. But not if you’re giving a eulogy.

Funny Jokes about Presentation Challenges.

Okay, funny may be a little overexaggerated, but corny can work too. Here are a few jokes about challenges that can come up in a presentation.

  • Why did the PowerPoint presentation go to therapy? It had too many issues with transitions.
  • I was going to tell a time-traveling joke during my speech, but you didn’t like it.
  • I asked the librarian if there were any books on how to overcome the fear of public speaking. She whispered, “They’re in the self-help section, but you might have to speak up to find them.”
  • I used to be a baker before I became a public speaker. I kneaded the dough, and now I need the audience!
  • Why did the public speaker become a gardener? Because he knew how to plant ideas and watch them grow!

These Jokes Are about Audience Interaction.

Jokes Are about Audience Interaction

  • I asked the audience if anyone had experience with public speaking. A cricket in the corner started chirping.
  • The best way to become a confident public speaker is to imagine the audience in their underwear. Unless you’re speaking at a nudist colony.
  • I told my wife I was going to give a speech on procrastination. She said, “Maybe next time.”
  • How do you make a tissue dance during a speech? You put a little boogie in it!
  • Why did the extroverted computer become a public speaker? Because it had great social networking skills!

Public Speaking Jokes about Presentation Themes.

These funny (or corny) jokes are about the process of public speaking. You can easily use one of these if you start with… “Before I actually start my presentation…” then add the joke.

  • I asked my friend if he had any advice for public speaking. He said, “Yes, just imagine the audience is full of cats. They don’t care what you’re saying, but they’ll pay attention if you have treats.”
  • How do you organize a fantastic space-themed presentation? You planet!
  • Why did the public speaker bring a ladder to the presentation? To reach new heights in communication!
  • My friend tried to give a speech on patience, but the audience left before he finished. It seems they didn’t have the patience for it.
  • Why did the microphone apply for a job in public speaking? Because it wanted to be heard at work!

A Few Random Public Speaking Jokes (Use with Caution.)

These last few public speaking jokes are a little more tricky. You’d want to save these only for the right type of crowd.

  • I used to be afraid of public speaking, but then I realized it’s just talking in front of people. Now I’m terrified of public listening.
  • What’s a public speaker’s favorite kind of fish? The articulate!
  • I told my friend I was giving a speech about a famous chicken. He asked, “Is it poultry in motion?”
  • I was going to make a joke about public speaking, but I figured it would be better in front of a live audience.
  • Why did the scarecrow become a great public speaker? He was outstanding in his field!

Remember, just adding a joke or two to a speech won’t win over every audience. For help becoming a confident and effective presenter, we invite you to attend one of our 2-Day Fearless Presentations ® Classes . Click here for details.

Here Are a Few Public Speaking One-Liners to Get Your Audience Laughing.

You’ll have a much easier time just adding a funny one-liner every now and then. When you tell a joke, you typically have to get your audience to respond. And, in some cases, the audience will finish your joke.

So a well-placed one-liner will often get you a quick chuckle without as much risk. Here are a few that we organized into five different categories.

These One-Liners Are Related to Audience Interaction (Or Audience Reactions.)

Public Speaking One-Liners

  • “I’m not saying I’m a great public speaker, but I did once get a standing ovation… because I tripped over the microphone cord.”
  • “I asked my audience if they had any questions after my speech. One person raised their hand and asked, ‘When does the torture end?'”
  • “Public speaking is easy. It’s like riding a bike. Except the bike is on fire, you’re on fire, everything is on fire, and you’re in hell.”
  • “I used to be afraid of public speaking until I realized every audience is just a bunch of people hoping you don’t notice them.”
  • “I gave a speech on procrastination. The audience is still waiting for the punchline.”

Here Are a Few about Speech Techniques and Styles.

  • “I asked the audience if they knew the definition of a will. Apparently, ‘a dead giveaway’ wasn’t the right answer.”
  • “I don’t have a fear of public speaking; I have a fear of public not listening.”
  • “Why don’t public speakers ever get lost? Because they always find their way to the lectern.”
  • “I used to be a mime, but I couldn’t stay silent about it. Now I’m a public speaker.”
  • “I told the audience I’d be speaking off the cuff. Turns out, my cuff was more interesting than my speech.”

That’s Ironic! One Liners about Humor and Irony in Speech

That's Ironic! One Liners about Humor and Irony in Speech

  • “I used to be a public speaker at a mime convention. Needless to say, my speeches were a big hit.”
  • “I asked the audience if they could define irony. They said, ‘Sure, it’s like goldy and bronzy, but made of iron.'”
  • “Public speaking is a lot like a roller coaster. It’s terrifying, and I always feel like I’m going to lose my lunch.”
  • “I used to be a motivational speaker, but then I lost my train of thought. Now I’m just a ‘meh’-tivational speaker.”
  • “Why did the public speaker bring a ladder to the speech? To reach the high points, of course!”

These One-Liners Are about Speech Topics and Delivery.

  • “I told the audience I’m going to talk about time travel. They’re still waiting for my future self to arrive.”
  • “I tried to give a speech on humility, but everyone said I was the best at it.”
  • “Why did the public speaker get an award? Because he was outstanding in his field of expertise – corn farming.”
  • “I asked the crowd if they liked my tie. They said, ‘It’s not the tie, it’s what you’re saying that’s knot working.'”
  • “I tried to make a speech about sleep, but I dozed off during my own presentation.”

Funny One-Liners Related to the Challenges of Public Speaking.

  • “I asked the audience for silence during my speech. Apparently, their laughter didn’t get the memo.”
  • (If your audience won’t give you feedback.) “Dialogue is like a parachute – it only works when it’s open.”
  • (If you happen to break wind because of nervousness.) “I’m not a nervous public speaker. I just have a very expressive colon.”
  • “I told my wife I’m writing a book on public speaking. She told me to speak louder.”
  • “Why did the PowerPoint file go to therapy? It had too many issues with transitions.”

Funny Motivational Quotes Related to Public Speaking.

A really good way to add humor to any speech is to insert a funny quote from a famous person. These funny motivational quotes are very easy to insert. In fact, you can add them to your speech introduction right at the start. That will lighten the tension in the room and get your audience laughing.

Here are a few that always hit home!

Funny Quotes About Preparation and Delivery of Speech.

Funny Quotes About Preparation and Delivery of Speech

  • “The human brain starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.” – George Jessel
  • “It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.” – Mark Twain
  • “Speak clearly, if you speak at all; carve every word before you let it fall.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
  • “A good speech should be like a woman’s skirt; long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.” – Winston Churchill
  • “The best way to sound like you know what you’re talking about is to know what you’re talking about.” – Author Unknown

Quotes Related to Adding Humor to Your Speech.

If you are looking for a famous quote specifically about adding humor to a speech, try one of these.

  • “The first time I spoke in the West, the agents and organizers looked at me and said, ‘Oh, my God, she’s funny.’ And I thought, ‘Oh, my God, I’ve been funny all my life, but I never knew it.'” – Maya Angelou
  • “If you can’t make it good, at least make it look good.” – Bill Gates
  • “I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it.” – George Carlin
  • “The trouble with talking too fast is you may say something you haven’t thought of yet.” – Ann Landers
  • “I used to be a good communicator, but then I realized I was talking to myself.” – Author Unknown

Here Are a Few Quotes About Creativity and Writing.

Here Are a Few Quotes About Creativity and Writing

  • “I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” – Steven Wright
  • “I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.” – Steven Wright
  • “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” – Douglas Adams
  • “I don’t need time. What I need is a deadline.” – Duke Ellington
  • “I can’t understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid, my father took me to all the historic spots. Every time I refused to get out of the car.” – W.C. Fields

The Funny Quotes Can Help You Make Your Point Better.

Like the last group, these funny quotes aren’t about public speaking. But you will likely be able to use them if you are delivering an informative speech.

  • “The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.” – Oscar Wilde
  • “I have never been in a situation where having a sense of humor and a giving spirit didn’t lead to a better result.” – Ed Catmull
  • “The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his way.” – Josh Billings
  • “I like to talk about my obsession with food. I love to eat. I’m not a ‘foodie,’ but I do love to eat.” – Miranda Kerr
  • “I failed public speaking in college the first time and made a ‘D’ in the second class. It was horrible.” – John Grisham

These Last Funny Quotes Didn’t Fit the Other Categories. (LOL!)

These last quotes didn’t really fit in any of the other categories. But they are pretty funny. If you can find a way to insert them into your speech, you’re sure to get a laugh or two.

  • “It’s hard to be serious when you’re surrounded by balloons.” – Jerry Seinfeld
  • “I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.” – Elayne Boosler
  • “The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Willie Nelson
  • “I used to be a heavy gambler. But now I just make mental bets. That’s how I lost my mind.” – Steve Allen

Dad Jokes that You Can Use as Presentation Icebreakers.

Dad Jokes that You Can Use as Presentation Icebreakers

Years ago, I taught a leadership class for his team. And at the start of every session, he stood up in front of the group and told a corny Dad joke. The jokes were cringy. But whether the audience laughed or turned up their nose, they all smiled. Over the next few years, I noticed that Ron’s employee turnover was almost zero. It was unheard of in his industry.

It turns out that his team absolutely loved him. He made a tough job much more fun to come to. So, I changed my tune about Dad jokes. Here are a few that you can use to start your next speech or meeting.

Food Public Speaking Jokes

  • What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
  • Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion? There was nothing left but de-brie.
  • What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A kingfish.
  • Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side.
  • What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

Science and Technology Jokes.

  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  • I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won’t stop sending me vacation ads.
  • Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.
  • How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
  • What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!

Academic Jokes for a Presentation.

Academic Jokes for a Presentation

  • Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
  • Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
  • What do you call a factory that makes good products? A satisfactory.
  • I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
  • I used to have a job at a calendar factory, but I got fired because I took a couple of days off.

Spooky Jokes

  • Why did the skeleton go to the seance? To talk to the other side.
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  • What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hi, bud!”
  • I went to buy some camouflage pants, but I couldn’t find any.
  • What did one hat say to the other hat? Stay here, I’m going on ahead.

Miscellaneous Jokes

  • I only know how to make holy water. I boil the hell out of it.
  • Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
  • Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
  • What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
  • What did the snowman with a six-pack say? An abdominal snowman!

what to put in a speech for school captain

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Why do you want to be a school captain? 7 Sample Answers Included

Serving as a school captain is an excellent leadership opportunity and the perfect way to make a lasting impact on your school. But when it comes time for an interview, you will likely be asked, “Why do you want to be a school captain?”. In this article, we will guide you through preparing your answer and crafting an effective response showcasing your unique skills and motivations.

Why do you want to be a school captain answers

This article aims to equip you with the knowledge and tools necessary to effectively communicate why you are the right candidate for the position of school captain. Whether you are a student who aspires to be a school captain or someone interested in learning about leadership and public speaking, this article is for you.

Table of Contents

How to prepare for answering “Why do you want to be a school captain?”

Before answering the question, “Why do you want to be a school captain?” it is important to take some time to prepare. This will ensure that you are ready to give a confident and compelling answer that showcases your unique skills and motivations.

Research about the school and its values:

To start, take some time to research the school and its values. Learn about its history, mission, and goals, and consider how you can align your personal goals with the school. This will help you tailor your answer to the school’s specific needs.

Consider personal experiences and motivations:

Think about your own experiences and motivations for wanting to be a school captain. What inspired you to pursue this position? What personal qualities and skills do you possess that make you well-suited for the role?

Identify your unique skills and strengths:

Consider your unique skills and strengths and how they can contribute to your success as a school captain. Whether you can communicate effectively, your leadership skills, or your passion for making a difference, highlight these qualities in your answer.

How to answer “Why do you want to be a school captain?”

Once you have a clear understanding of the question and have taken the time to prepare, it’s time to craft your answer. Your answer should be clear and concise and showcase your passion and qualifications for the role of school captain.

Start with a strong opening:

Begin your answer with a strong opening that immediately captures the interviewer’s attention. This could be a personal story, a statement of purpose, or a specific experience that highlights your qualifications for the role.

Tailor your answer to the school:

Your answer should be tailored to the specific needs of the school. Consider the school’s values and goals, and show how your goals align with theirs.

Talk about your school involvement and passions:

Being passionate about something gives people purpose—it drives them forward and can also help them stay focused when other obstacles get in their way. Think about which aspects of your school life have been meaningful for you. Are there any activities or clubs that have sparked your interest? Any classes that motivate you? Are any causes or issues related to student life that matters deeply to you? If so, explain why they matter to you and how being a school captain would provide the perfect platform for taking action and making progress on these matters.

Highlight your unique skills and experiences:

Make sure to highlight your unique skills and experiences that make you well-suited for the role of school captain. Whether you can communicate effectively, your leadership skills, or your passion for making a difference, be sure to showcase these qualities in your answer.

Your answer should reflect your qualities as a leader:

When answering this question, you must focus on yourself rather than talking about how much of an improvement the school needs or how much better things would be if someone else were in charge. Instead, focus on expressing what qualities you can bring to the position and why those qualities make you well-suited for the job. For example, if you are organized, detail-oriented, and great at problem-solving, explain how these qualities would help you take the initiative or resolve any issues that may arise during your term as school captain.

Discuss your goals as school captain:

If accepted into the role of school captain, what goals would you set out to accomplish? Think carefully about what legacy you want to leave behind when your term ends. Do you want students at your school to feel more connected? Do you want everyone at the institution—teachers included—to feel supported by each other? These are just some examples of achievable goals that could come from being a successful leader in such a role. Describing these goals can also show the committee evaluating candidates who understand what a school captain requires and have concrete ideas about moving forward with this responsibility.

End with a strong conclusion:

End your answer with a strong conclusion reiterating your passion for the role and your commitment to leadership. This could be a statement of purpose, a vision for your future as a school captain, or a call to action.

7 sample answers: “Why do you want to be a school captain?”:

  • “Ever since I was young, I’ve been drawn to leadership roles. As a school captain, I can not only serve as a role model for my peers but also have the opportunity to impact our school community positively. I have strong communication skills and a passion for bringing people together, which make me well-suited for the role of school captain.
  • “I have a deep love for our school and its values, and I believe that I can help to further those values and make a positive difference in the lives of my classmates. I am a strong leader with a proven track record of bringing people together to achieve a common goal. I am eager to use these skills to serve as a positive influence and help to build a stronger, more inclusive school community.”
  • “The power of community has always inspired me, and as a school captain, I can help to create a sense of belonging and unity among my classmates. I have excellent interpersonal skills and a deep commitment to serving others, which make me well-suited for the role of school captain. I am eager to use my skills and experiences to help create a more positive and supportive school environment for everyone.”
  • “I have a passion for helping others and making a positive impact, and as a school captain, I can use these skills to make a difference in the lives of my classmates. I have strong organizational skills and a proven track record of leading successful projects and initiatives. I am eager to bring these skills to the role of school captain, and I am confident that I can help to create a better and more inclusive school community.”
  • “I have a strong commitment to excellence, and as a school captain, I can help to raise the bar and push our school to new heights. I have excellent leadership skills and am well-known for my ability to inspire and motivate others. I am eager to use these skills to positively influence and help create a more successful and dynamic school community.”
  • “I have always been drawn to leadership roles, and I believe that as a school captain, I can help to make an on our school community. I have excellent communication skills and a passion for serving others, which make me well-suited for the role of school captain. I am eager to use my skills and experiences to help create a more positive and supportive school environment for everyone.”
  • “I am deeply committed to the success and well-being of our school, and as a school captain, I can help to create a more positive and inclusive environment for everyone. I have excellent organizational skills and a proven track record of bringing people together to achieve a common goal. I am eager to use these skills to serve as a positive influence and help to build a stronger, more united school community.”
  • “I have been a highly involved student at my school since I started in grade nine. I have dedicated myself to being a part of the school community, whether it be through participating in extra-curricular activities or volunteering my time and energy. Being a school captain would allow me to make a real impact on the lives of my peers and make our school an even better place. I want to use this position to lead by example and ensure everyone feels included and represented.”

Being a school captain is a great responsibility and a fantastic opportunity to impact your school community positively. Answering the question, “Why do you want to be a school captain?” is an important part of the process, as it allows you to showcase your passion, skills, and qualifications for the role.

By taking the time to understand the question, preparing your answer, and crafting a clear and compelling response, you can deliver a confident and inspiring answer that will set you apart and help you to achieve your goal of becoming a school captain.

Always be yourself and let your passion and commitment to leadership shine through in your answer. Good luck!

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Speech on Sports Captain

A sports captain plays a key role in leading a team to victory. They’re the ones who inspire, motivate, and guide their teammates on and off the field.

Being a sports captain isn’t just about wearing a special armband. It’s about showing courage, making tough decisions, and setting an example for others.

1-minute Speech on Sports Captain

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Good day to you all. Today, I stand before you to deliver a speech on a role that’s crucial in the sporting world – the Sports Captain. A sports captain is not just a title, it’s a responsibility, a duty, and a personification of commitment and teamwork.

A sports captain is the backbone of a team. They hold the baton of leadership, organizing, and uniting the team. They are tasked to bring out the best in each player, ensuring everyone is working harmoniously towards a shared goal. They liaise between the coach and the players, ensuring that the strategies are understood and executed properly.

Being a sports captain is not just about talent in a particular sport. It’s also about exhibiting strong leadership skills, showing respect towards teammates and opponents alike, demonstrating a high level of discipline, and the ability to motivate and inspire others.

A sports captain is also a role model, setting an example both on and off the field. They have to maintain a fine balance of competitiveness and sportsmanship, as they represent not only themselves but also their team and their school or organization. It is their ethical behavior and positive attitude that sets the tone for the rest of the team.

In conclusion, being a sports captain is both an honor and a challenge. It requires an individual to transcend personal glory for the betterment of the team. So let’s appreciate the hard work and dedication of our sports captains, and support them as they guide our teams to victory.

2-minute Speech on Sports Captain

Good morning to all. Today, I am honoured to stand before you and speak on the topic of ‘Sports Captain’. A sports captain is not just a title, it is a responsibility, an honour, and a platform to inspire. A sports captain leads their team not just on the field but off the field as well, instilling discipline, promoting teamwork and embodying sportsmanship.

A sports captain is expected to lead by example. This does not merely mean scoring the highest runs or goals but demonstrating a high level of commitment, dedication, and respect for the game. As a sports captain, one should be the first to arrive and the last to leave, always ready to put in the extra effort to improve oneself and the team. They ought to be an epitome of discipline, punctuality and physical fitness.

However, a good sports captain knows that leadership extends beyond personal performance. They understand the importance of teamwork and unity. They know how to motivate their team members, encourage them during their lows, and celebrate their achievements. They must possess the ability to bring together individuals with different temperaments, strengths and weaknesses, and mould them into a cohesive unit. They must foster an environment of trust and respect, where every team member feels valued.

Furthermore, a sports captain must embody sportsmanship. Winning is important, but a great sports captain understands that it is not everything. They should appreciate the spirit of the game, respect their opponents, accept defeat graciously, and celebrate victory humbly. They set a standard for their teammates to follow, ensuring that the game is played in its truest spirit.

Being a sports captain also means being a role model. Younger players look up to the captain for guidance and inspiration. They observe the captain’s behaviour, actions, and attitude towards the game. Therefore, a sports captain must be mindful of this influence and strive to set a positive example, both on and off the field.

In conclusion, a sports captain is a leader, a team player, a sportsman, and a role model. Stepping into this role requires a perfect blend of talent, leadership skills, and a deep-rooted love for the game. Being a sports captain is a rewarding experience, offering opportunities to learn, grow, and inspire. It is a role that requires commitment and dedication, but the rewards are equally great.

Remember, a team is only as strong as its weakest link, and a good sports captain ensures that every link in the chain is strong. So, let us applaud the spirit of sportsmanship and celebrate the role of a sports captain in shaping a team. Thank you for your attention.

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Speech for School Captain Election

Winning an election is a tedious task. Only those can uderstand it who have ever fought elections in their life; be it at the school level, college level, organisational level or at the national level. In order to win the votes the candidates must be able to put their qualities properly in front of the voters. It can be done through delivering a genuine and strong speech. Here comes a sample speech for school captain election that can help you win that school captain post and see your dream coming true.

Good Morning to all my respected teachers and friends. It’s my pleasure to stand here and contest for the post of school captain. I have a dream today. It is that our school will enter the top 10 schools’ list in the coming years and I know it is not impossible. Do you agree with me?

I have been studying in this school since my nursery class. Now I am in class 10th. You can count that it has been more than a decade now. So, I can feel the pulse of my school. I know that you people have great potential. I know resources are ample but the motivation, the enthusiasm are lacking.

So, I would try to put my team’s efforts in the right direction which is to make sure that every student is notified of the competitions, quizzes and other activities going on at intra-school and inter-school levels. A few students can’t change the destiny of a school, that’s why 100 per cent student participation is a must.

You can always share your concerns with me. I am always open to criticism also and ready to improve. So please lend me your precious advice. I believe that I have the experience to fit in this role.

To turn my dream into reality I need your vote and support to choose me for the post of school captain. I am sure that would use your due diligence and elect the right person as school captain.

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School Captain Speech

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100 Captain Jokes

Ahoy there, mateys! Get ready to set sail on a laughter-filled voyage as we delve into the world of captain jokes. Captains, with their seafaring adventures and nautical expertise, may be known for their serious demeanor, but these jokes will reveal their playful side.

From clever wordplay to pun-tastic humor, these jokes will have you chuckling like a jolly sailor on the high seas. So, grab your sailor’s hat and get ready to navigate through a sea of laughter with these rib-tickling captain jokes!

Captain Jokes

Here’re The Top 100 Captain Jokes:

  • Why don’t captains ever get lost at sea? Because they always follow their “C” (see) charts!
  • Why did the captain bring red paint onboard? To be able to redeck-orate!
  • How do you make a pirate captain furious? Burn his treasure map .
  • Why did the captain break up with his girlfriend ? He realized he’s really in ship with her.
  • Why did the captain become a gardener ? Because he couldn’t resist the “tide” of nature.
  • Why did the captain sit on the pot of gold ? He wanted to be on “bounty.”
  • Why don’t captains use pens ? They’re afraid it might leak!
  • How do captain’s parties always end? By sinking the night away.
  • Why do captains make horrible comedians ? Their jokes are always off-ship.
  • What’s a captain’s favorite type of exercise ? Cardio-ship.
  • Why was the captain always calm? Because even when things go bad, he knows he can just ship out.
  • Why are captains bad at playing hide and seek ? Because they always peer-at-sea (peer at sea).
  • Why did the captain bring iron and copper on board? Because he wanted to avoid scurvy, so he brought Fe and Cu ( vitamin C).
  • Why did the captain never play cards with the jungle cat ? He was afraid of cheetahs.
  • What do you call a ship that only has captains onboard? Captain Crunch.
  • Why don’t captains use the internet? Because they’re afraid of phishing.
  • Why do captains hate cold weather ? Because it’s hard to navigate through ice-bergers.
  • Why was the captain always happy on his boat ? Because every wave brings a new surge of happiness.
  • Why was the captain so good at bowling ? He always had the perfect delivery.
  • Why was the captain a great dancer ? He mastered the “anchor” step.
  • What did the captain say when he bumped into the land? Long time no sea!
  • How did the captain’s son pass his exams? He really knew how to set sail into the sea of knowledge.
  • Why did the captain install a door on his ship? He wanted to have a hard-port access.
  • Why did the captain go to art school ? He wanted to learn the ropes of painting .
  • Why did the captain make a poor DJ ? He always dropped the bass (base) too early.
  • Why did the captain bring his cat on the ship? To have a purr-sistant company.
  • How do you know if a captain is good at math ? He can always count on his crew.
  • Why are captains always broke? They always have their money tied up in knots .
  • What’s a captain’s favorite type of music ? Ship-hop.
  • Why don’t captains ever get thirsty? They have an endless supply of vitamin sea.
  • Why did the captain wear a raincoat? He wanted to avoid a sea-sonal change.
  • What’s a captain’s favorite vegetable? Ship-peas.
  • Why did the captain go to the theater? He heard there was a good play on “dock.”
  • Why did the captain become a chef? He wanted to explore a different kind of “stew”-ardship.
  • Why do captains hate playing football ? They’re afraid of the tackle.
  • Why did the captain go to the gym ? He wanted to work on his sea-legs.
  • Why was the captain good at chess ? He knew all the rook-moves.
  • What did the captain say when he found the treasure? “I’m hooked!”
  • Why did the captain join a rock band ? He was good with the bass.
  • Why did the captain get a guitar ? He wanted to strum away his loneliness at sea.
  • Why did the captain go to the tailor? He needed a new suit-n-tie-dal wave.
  • Why do captains like the beach ? They’re fans of sand-bars.
  • Why did the captain become a writer? He wanted to jot down his sea-crets.
  • Why did the captain start a recycling program on his ship? He was tired of all the sea-waste.
  • Why did the captain invest in real estate ? He was interested in dock properties.
  • Why did the captain always carry a knife ? He loved to cut through the sea-breeze.
  • Why did the captain go to the disco ? He was in the mood for some ship-n-roll.
  • Why did the captain never lose at poker ? He always had an ace up his sleeve .
  • Why did the captain love to skydive? He was a fan of free-falling.
  • Why did the captain never get sick? He always took his sea-vitamins.
  • Why do captains dislike basketball? The nets remind them of fishing .
  • Why did the captain join a choir ? He loved to sing sea-shanties.
  • What does a captain say when he sees a beautiful sunset? “Aye, beauty at sea!”
  • Why did the captain bring a duck on board? He needed someone to quack jokes with.
  • Why did the captain start a bakery ? He loved making bread-knots.
  • Why did the captain have a pet parrot? He loved a good squawk every now and then.
  • Why did the captain start a gardening club on his ship? He wanted to grow sea-ds (seeds).
  • Why did the captain get a telescope? He was interested in stargazing.
  • Why was the captain a great swimmer ? He always knew how to stay afloat.
  • Why did the captain become a teacher ? He loved to anchor knowledge in young minds.
  • Why did the captain get a dog ? He needed a first mate.
  • Why did the captain love fishing? He found it reel-y relaxing.
  • Why did the captain get a haircut? He didn’t want to be mistaken for a mop.
  • Why did the captain like rainy days? They brought a wave of calmness.
  • Why did the captain never have a messy ship? He was a clean-sweep.
  • Why did the captain start a book club? He loved diving into the depths of stories.
  • Why did the captain hate skiing? He wasn’t a fan of the slippery slope.
  • Why did the captain become a mechanic ? He wanted to be in ship-shape.
  • Why did the captain buy a lot of shoes ? He had a fetish for sole-searching.
  • Why did the captain love sunny days? They brightened up his sails.
  • Why did the captain buy a lot of hats? He loved to cap-tivate.
  • Why did the captain hate playing golf ? The holes reminded him of leaks.
  • Why did the captain become a magician ? He loved to keep his crew spellbound.
  • Why did the captain love to paint? He loved making a splash of color.
  • Why did the captain get a motorcycle ? He wanted to be a ship of the road.
  • Why did the captain start a music club? He loved to tune into the rhythm of the sea.
  • Why did the captain buy a lot of sunglasses ? He was blinded by the sea’s beauty.
  • Why did the captain get a camera ? He loved to capture the moments at sea.
  • Why did the captain never get tired? He was always in ship-shape.
  • Why did the captain love cooking ? He loved to stir things up.
  • Why did the captain never play darts? The targets reminded him of treasure maps.
  • Why did the captain love sailing at night? He loved the starry sea.
  • Why did the captain never play chess? The knights reminded him of pirates.
  • Why did the captain love winter ? He loved to break the ice .
  • Why did the captain love to travel? He loved to sea the world.
  • Why did the captain never gamble? He hated to lose his ship.
  • Why did the captain love gardening? He loved to plant his roots.
  • Why did the captain love the full moon ? It made the sea-glow.
  • Why did the captain never argue? He hated to create waves.
  • Why did the captain never play pool ? The balls reminded him of cannonballs.
  • Why did the captain love comedy? He loved to crack up.
  • Why did the captain love hiking ? He loved the mountain’s peak.
  • Why did the captain never go on a diet ? He hated to lose his ship.
  • Why did the captain love the sunrise? It brought a new day at sea.
  • Why did the captain love dessert ? It was the sweetest part of the meal.
  • Why did the captain love puzzles ? They kept his mind afloat.
  • Why did the captain never get a tattoo? He feared it would sink in.
  • Why did the captain love photography ? He loved to capture the moments.
  • Why did the captain love horseriding? He loved to take the reins.
  • Why did the captain never go on a roller coaster ? He hated the ups and downs.

Ah, we’ve reached the shore of humor’s end, but fear not, for the spirit of these captain jokes will continue to float in your laughter-filled memories . From their uncanny navigation skills to their ability to find joy even in the choppiest of waters, captains have proven that a hearty laugh can be the wind in their sails.

So, whether you’re a seasoned mariner or a landlubber in search of mirth, remember these captain jokes as a reminder that even the saltiest of sailors can’t resist a good laugh. Fair winds and following seas, mateys!

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what to put in a speech for school captain

Space cadet: Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee tells schoolkids that moon is a ‘planet’ and ‘made up mostly of gases’

W ASHINGTON — Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Texas) stunned attendees at a high school solar eclipse event Monday by claiming the rock-solid moon is a “planet” that is “made up mostly of gases” — before adding she still wants to be “first in line” to learn how to live there.

The former top Democrat on the House Science Committee’s space subcommittee badly botched elementary lunar facts while speaking during the gathering at Booker T. Washington High School in Houston.

“You’ve heard the word ‘full moon.’ Sometimes you need to take the opportunity just to come out and see a full moon is that complete rounded circle, which is made up mostly of gases,” Jackson Lee, 74, told teenage pupils who gathered on a sports field ahead of the rare celestial event.

“And that’s why the question is why or how could we as humans live on the moon? Are the gases such that we could do that?” the congresswoman said.

“The sun is a mighty powerful heat, but it’s almost impossible to go near the sun. The moon is more manageable.”

Jackson Lee made a series of other questionable statements, including saying the moon, which reflects the sun’s light, gives off “unique light and energy” and misstating the scientific reason for the eclipse.

“You have the energy of the moon at night,” she told the kids.

The solar eclipse was happening because the Earth was unusually close to the moon, she said — though, in fact, the eclipse was the result of the alignment of the sun and moon.

“I don’t think we’ve been on the moon the last 50 years. So we will be landing on the moon. What you’ll see today will be the closest distance that the moon has ever been in the last 20 years. Which means that’s why they will shut the light down because they will be close to the Earth,” she said of the eclipse alignment.

“I don’t know about you, I want to be first in line to know how to live and to be able to survive on the moon,” Jackson Lee added. “That’s another planet which we’re going to see shortly.”

Jackson Lee is notorious in DC for high staff turnover because of her allegedly unusual and abusive demands of staffers.

In a statement to The Post on Tuesday, she admitted she was wrong to describe the moon, which has virtually no atmosphere, as being composed mostly of gas to the schoolkids.

“Obviously I misspoke and meant to say the sun, but as usual, Republicans are focused on stupid things instead of stuff that really matters. What can I say, though, foolish thinkers lust for stupidity!” she said of GOPers who swiftly criticized her glaring gaffes.

“They should be focusing on issues like prenatal care, building more affordable housing, and more reduction of student loan debt as President Joe Biden is,” Jackson Lee said. “Also, I care more about these children who would not have experienced the eclipse in this enthusiastic manner. And, I care more about protecting the rights of women and children than engaging in this kind of senseless dialogue!”

Jackson Lee has not deleted from her X page the footage of herself providing the miseducation to local students.

The video went viral after it was clipped and reposted by Houston-area radio host Kenny Webster.

“As a local Houston talk radio personality, she supplies us with a never-ending vault of content. She’s better than satire,” Webster told The Post.

Space cadet: Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee tells schoolkids that moon is a ‘planet’ and ‘made up mostly of gases’

Missouri teen beaten in viral video is out of ICU but has limited speech and trouble walking on her own, attorney says

Hazelwood East High School in St. Louis County, Mo.

A Missouri teenager who was brutally beaten in what officials called a "deranged display of violence" by another teen is out of the intensive care unit but has limited speech and trouble walking on her own, an attorney for the family said.

Kaylee Gain has been hospitalized since a March 8 fight near Hazelwood East High School in St. Louis County that was captured in a viral social media video.

The footage shows several people brawling in the street near the intersection of Norgate and Claudine drives, the St. Louis County Police Department said in a  March 11 Facebook post .

Kaylee Gain

One person is seen repeatedly punching Gain and slamming her head to the ground. A 15-year-old girl was arrested on assault charges a day after the fight, authorities said.

Police said the victim was found "suffering a severe head injury" and was taken to the hospital in critical condition.

In an update Friday, an attorney for Gain's family said she was out of the intensive care unit and "has been able to engage in limited verbal conversations."

"Kaylee also recently began speech therapy, and has gone on a few short walks with the assistance of hospital staff as she is still unable to ambulate on her own," attorney Bryan Kaemmerer said. "However, Kaylee does not have any recollection of the altercation that led to her hospitalization."

Kaemmerer addressed several social media rumors about the altercation, denying reports that Gain's mother drove her to the location of the fight.

He said Gain's mother was at work and was driven to the hospital by a co-worker after police informed her of what happened.

The attorney, however, did confirm reports that Gain had been involved in a fight on March 7 with a different teenager. Both girls were suspended after that incident, Kaemmerer said.

He said it was unclear whether the March 8 brawl was retaliation.

Gain's parents are calling for the 15-year-old to be tried as an adult. Kaemmerer said in his statement that "the family believes trying the accused as an adult is the most appropriate way to provide the justice that Kaylee deserves."

Authorities have not said if the 15-year-old would be tried as an adult.

St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Wesley Bell  said  in a post on X that the fight was "sickening" and the video was "difficult to watch."

Missouri Attorney General Andrew Bailey called the actions in the video a "deranged display of violence that must be punished to the full extent of the law."

On Thursday, police announced that eight more teenagers were referred to St. Louis County Family Court for consideration of assault charges, NBC affiliate KSDK of St. Louis reported. They include a 17-year-old girl, a 17-year-old boy, two 16-year-old girls, three 16-year-old boys, and one 14-year-old girl. None of the teens have been taken into custody.

Minyvonne Burke is a senior breaking news reporter for NBC News.

IMAGES

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  2. School Captain Speech

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  3. BEST SCHOOL CAPTAIN Speech

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  4. 💐 Great school captain speeches. How to Write a Speech to Win School

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  6. Ideas for school captain speech Essay Sample

    what to put in a speech for school captain

COMMENTS

  1. How to Write a Speech to Win School Captain

    Outline your speech with main points and then write out your speech to avoid stumbling on your words or rambling. Start with an introduction that includes your name, year in school and the reasons you are highly qualified to serve as school captain. List specific examples of your prior accomplishments in extracurricular activities and student ...

  2. Writing an Effective Year 12 School Captain Speech: A Guide to Winning

    Here are a few examples of a school captain speech: Example 1: "Dear fellow students, teachers, and staff, today I stand before you as a candidate for the position of School Captain. I believe that our school is more than just a place of learning; it is a community that fosters growth, friendship, and opportunity.

  3. How to Write a Better Captain Speech

    Aim for up to two minutes in length, but be bold and take longer if you need to. 4. Make It Personal. Your speech should be about your goals for the role, so make sure it reflects your personality and passions. This is an excellent opportunity to show everyone why you are the perfect class captain! 5. Practice.

  4. How To Write A Speech For School Captain

    Five tips on school captain speech writing 1. Be authoritative. A leader is authoritative and decisive. Being a school captain comes with a responsibility that you have to fulfill. The position of a school captain, therefore, needs an authoritative and decisive person who can guide the school in the right direction without wavering.

  5. Speech Guidelines for a School Captain Candidate Plus an Example

    Speech Writing Guidelines for a School Captain. 1. Let your message be brief and precise. Avoid using many filler words to make the speech long. With a long speech, you will obviously loose the attention of the audience. The speech should be short and content rich. It should be straight to the point.

  6. PDF 2017 Year 6 School Captains speeches

    to put themselves forward for the student leadership positions of School Captain and Vice School Captain and are all encouraged to take part in the student elections, which is overseen by the staff. The children presented their speeches to their Year 5-6 peers and their speeches were recorded.

  7. How to Write a Better Captain Speech

    A class captain acts as a role model. Five tips at school captain speech writing · 1. Be authorization. ADENINE leader is authoritative also decisive. · 2. Keep your message short and clarify. They are also responsible for encouraging collaboration among undergraduate press helpers to building community energy.

  8. A Good Speech For School Captain

    For the upcoming football match, I wish both teams the best. Ensure you abide by the school policies promptly to stay away from trouble. Finally, I wish you a happy, peaceful and fruitful week. Thank you for listening. Concisely, this article has described in detail the process of writing a good captain's speech.

  9. How to Write a Speech to Win School Captain

    A school or class captain in the British school system is like an school or class president includes the African school netz. Despite different titles, an roles are similar. The purpose of a undergraduate leadership your is to actually as a positive role model, encourage language spirit and embody school beliefs the values.

  10. PDF How to write a school captain speech

    Five tips on school captain speech writing 1. Be authoritative A leader is authoritative and decisive. Being a school captain comes with a responsibility that you have to fulfill. The position of a school captain, therefore, needs an authoritative and decisive person who can guide the school in the right direction without wavering.

  11. Funny Student Council Speech Ideas to Help Everyone Relate to You

    What are some examples of school captain speeches? - Quora. So large people can be naturally funny without trying too hard, so if you just relax and let own natural humor shine using is my student counsel speech, you'll how major. But if you've glued your pinky to the backspace trying to record yours, let us help it is these tips and ideas.

  12. 100 Public-Speaking Jokes to Add Humor to Your Next Speech

    Here are a few funny quote you can use if you had trouble creating or designing your speech. "The human brain starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.". - George Jessel. "It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.". - Mark Twain.

  13. Why do you want to be a school captain? 7 Sample Answers Included

    Being a school captain is a great responsibility and a fantastic opportunity to impact your school community positively. Answering the question, "Why do you want to be a school captain?" is an important part of the process, as it allows you to showcase your passion, skills, and qualifications for the role. By taking the time to understand ...

  14. Speech on House Captain

    In conclusion, being a House Captain is about making a difference. It is about leaving a mark, not just in the school, but in the hearts of your team members. Remember, being a House Captain is not about power, it is about service. It's not about ruling, it's about leading. Thank you. 2-minute Speech on House Captain. Good day to one and all!

  15. Speech on Sports Captain

    2-minute Speech on Sports Captain. Ladies and Gentlemen, Good morning to all. Today, I am honoured to stand before you and speak on the topic of 'Sports Captain'. A sports captain is not just a title, it is a responsibility, an honour, and a platform to inspire. A sports captain leads their team not just on the field but off the field as ...

  16. PDF Boy'S School Captain Speech

    BOY'S SCHOOL CAPTAIN SPEECH . They say people are born with leadership, but I believe it's forged within our past experiences. ... So, for me, becoming your school captain means so much more than just the title or a green blazer. It embodies the idea of being a role model, a friend, and even an inspiration for my peers to chase. ...

  17. School captain speech Free Essay Example

    School captain speech. Good morning /afternoon ___________ my name is _________I stand here before you to discuss the reason why I want to be part of the leadership team and hopefully become school captain for this year. (20__}. I realize that it's a privilege to have the honour but I am confident that I will be a suitable candidate.

  18. Jade's Primary Captain Speech Flashcards

    As School Captain, I will strive to guide every single one of you in this room to success, continuing to set a good example to you all. Thank you very much for taking the time to listen to my speech and good luck to everyone running for school captain today. I hope you all have an amazing Wednesday. God Bless you all!

  19. Speech for School Captain Election

    In order to win the votes the candidates must be able to put their qualities properly in front of the voters. It can be done through delivering a genuine and strong speech. Here comes a sample speech for school captain election that can help you win that school captain post and see your dream coming true. Speech for School Captain Election

  20. School Captain Speech

    School Captain Speech Good Afternoon, teachers and year 8 students of Marymount College. My name is Sara Petruzzella, I'm a student of 8 Amber and I would love to be your school captain for 2011. ... As a Type Two I, Put others before myself, I think about others and how my actions may influence them. Am very friendly, I am a very happy and ...

  21. Advice for school captain speech : r/vce

    Try to find the thread of commonality between groups and focus on that. Your speech should be all inclusive, confident and earnest. In my experience, attitude counts for a lot in leadership and trust is your most powerful tool for persuasion. Good luck!

  22. 100 Captain Jokes

    100 Captain Jokes. By Laughlore Team Updated on October 25, 2023. Ahoy there, mateys! Get ready to set sail on a laughter-filled voyage as we delve into the world of captain jokes. Captains, with their seafaring adventures and nautical expertise, may be known for their serious demeanor, but these jokes will reveal their playful side.

  23. Power of NO: Colleges are finally starting to stand up to ...

    Last week, some 150 students at Pomona College, a liberal arts school in Claremont, California, stormed the building that houses school president Gabrielle Starr's office — and refused to ...

  24. Speech Guidelines for a School Captain Candidate Plus an Example

    Speech Writing Guidelines for a School Captain 1. Let own message be brief real precise. Avoid using many filler words to make the speech long. With a long speech, thee will obviously loose the attention of the listeners. The speech should be short and content rich. It have be even to the point.

  25. Space cadet: Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee tells schoolkids that moon is a

    W ASHINGTON — Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Texas) stunned attendees at a high school solar eclipse event Monday by claiming the rock-solid moon is a "planet" that is "made up mostly of gases ...

  26. Missouri teen beaten in viral video is out of ICU but has limited

    A Missouri teenager who was brutally beaten in what officials called a "deranged display of violence" by another teen is out of the intensive care unit but has limited speech and trouble walking ...

  27. Ellis Genge: English rugby cannot afford to just rely on private school

    Ellis Genge, the England vice-captain, believes that rugby union's class divide is hampering the sport's development, as well as its ability to unearth talent. Genge, who started England's ...

  28. Jennifer Crumbley issues warning during her sentencing

    Jennifer Crumbley, the mother of Ethan Crumbley, who killed four students in the 2021 school shooting in Oxford, Michigan, spoke at her sentencing hearing moments before being sentenced to 10 to ...

  29. England drop captain Marlie Packer for Women's Six Nations match

    Marlie Packer has been dropped to the bench for England's Six Nations clash with Scotland this weekend as head coach John Mitchell hinted that no one in his squad is safe. It marks the first ...